I Miss U - Blog Posts

I know I should give her

Her space

But how am I supposed to rest

When my heart is trying its hardest

To break out of my ribcage

But I swear this oath today

From now on anything that comes for you

Will break against my flesh

I am always late

But not anymore

How dare I forget what I am for

No more

The wolf is dead

The wolf is dead

The wolf is back

I would happily leave this world but this is

       the only world that has you in it.

You can hurt me all you wish

You can hurt me without care,

Without any comfort to be there

Hurt me past my breaking point,

And I will hold onto the pain

Simply cause it came from you,

Cause it's something of you I can call mine.

Please. I miss her so much. It's making me want to stop being good.

insp

She comes before the world. No sacrifice is too big. Morality Is a privilege for those who love in finite measurement like weighing calories in a meal, careful not to go over maintenance.

Something we do not concern ourselves with. If bringing you back means the world gotta burn then I will have us rest comfortably on bed or Cinders under a roof of stars.

I died but I came back exactly the same. You though, I came back and you were wrong. Did the fact of my dying really damage you that much? Was bringing me back worth what it cost you? Would it have been better to just leave me?

I am so obsessed

         Got you so ingrained in me

  Your taste your smell your feel too

         So everytime my lips meet

          No doubt they only talk of you.

I want to kiss you so bad. Hard and deep.

         So everytime your lips meet

         You could still taste me.

You are so far away. And I am so down in the dumps. So unworthy. That admiting that I love you feels like fucking hubris.

You might not love me but you need me.   

      That has to be enough.

But what to do when

I am not even needed?

I'm the Artist, she's my Muse.

I'm the Devil, she's my Salvation.

I'm the Monster, she's my Humanity.

I'm the Wolf, She's my Moon.

She needs to recharge.

I hope

Why does this feel like a goodbye.

I was too weak

Now she is gone.

50 minutes and I am already waiting for her.

Relatable post that I dont want to relate to.

me giving affection: oh man i really hope im not like overstepping my boundaries here. what if i make them uncomfortable? do they feel obligated to say thank you? am i going too far and scaring them? what if i’m annoying?

me receiving affection: AAAAAAAAA!!!!! AAAAAAA!A!!!!!!!AAAAAAAAAAAA

I will cry. I am crying. Relatable.

Dean being so nonchalant and laid back hanging out with Cas normally but the second they agree to go on their first date, he becomes flustered and self conscious because he wants to make a "good first impression" on his best friend of 12 years

Tell me pretty lies

Look me in the face

Tell me that you love me

Even if it's fake

Cause' I don't fucking care

At

All

I am not afraid of death, nor am I afraid of an unlived life.

But I am afraid of growing old, without you by my side.

I am the disease that inflicts this world.

She is the one that keeps me at bay.

If she is taken from this world.

The world will die a slow agonizing death.

I am here and I am not going anywhere

In life, and in death,

In this life, and the next,

I will stay by your side,

Till the end.

I have heard that self love is survival. But for me it's my love for you that keeps me going.

Even as my hate for the world and self pushes me to end it all.

I wonder what it will take for you to love me back.

What it would take you to choose me.

But at the end of the day, This isn't something that is in my hand.

Is it love that you are only one I have ever longed for?

Is it love that you are the core of all my happy memories?

If yes,

Then whatever you do,

Whether you choose me or not,

I only ask that you let me love you

Wholeheartedly.

I second this. I see no point in staying where I am not needed. If it's always me running after you. It feels like I want you while you simply tolerate me out of politeness.

I cannot be the only one to initiate everything in my relationships anymore I’m going to go insane I need to be needed

I understand this and I understand why people would subscribe to this school of thought but I don't agree.

This, feels disingenuous. Like something we know we should do but we can't because it feels like a lie. Maybe it's just me and I need to grow up. But progress in my life doesn't really mean that I am letting go. They are Always will be my priority.

If I miss someone I will go. I have no honor in face of them. No shame. And it's true that it's important to create value through absence. But I can't create my absence because at the end of the day just want them to be happy and I can't stay away. So no hope either.

Me: Doc, I miss her too much. Not sure what to do.

Doc (also Me): Murther when feeling sappy / shy. Destiel when feeling numb / sad. Hannigram when feeling helpless / hopeless.

I wish I could let you go. I say as I get

       comfy in bed, hoping to dream of you again.

When I prayed I didn't think God would listen. Now she is taken from My dreams. Damn. Where do I call to rectify this?

I dream of you every night.

Every morning I lose you.

Everyday I pray to God—Either stop her from invading my dreams or don't wake me up.

I immediately thought of her...

Even though I am usually thinking of her.

This hit me the hardest

The moment when distraction break. When we realize that we live our lives going from one task to another trying not to obsess over one thing over one being.

Then moments like this when distraction breaks and we realize we were living a lie. The person is never truly gone and distractions won't change the fact that we are in the end, all alone

The hurt. That makes us pause. That hurts something special.

I was widdling a stick to make it smooth and my cousin says...

"Oh, you're skinning a stick... Who broke your heart?"

I immediately thought of her...

Even though I'm usually thinking of her.

I wanted to tell my cousin that I've been in love with the same person and or girl for the last 7 plus years...

But I didn't.

Even though my cousin is, I think the only one in my family, other than my Mom, to know I'm not exactly straight.

Another entry in Tumblr call-outs.

God I'm a sucker for characters who are so utterly loyal to someone that they're completely unhinged. Characters who have no moral compass except their overwhelming devotion to whoever they've chosen to listen to. That's the good shit

I fell in love with you and just like that I was  

       no longer perfect

This is it. The Tumblr experience. You are scrolling and bam you are called out.

I hate to overthink

But that’s just my speciality

I want to think you like me back

But my mind can’t stop thinking the opposite

I don’t want to give myself a fantasy

Knowing that it’s unrequited

Knowing that it’ll end with my heart broken

I<3

I am happy when with your memories. I am happy when we are talking. Then you leave. You are not mine. Then why am I so fucking sad.