Aroacespec - Blog Posts

Am I the only one who has a few specific friends who I'm really close with and love to be around, and, if they wanted to, I'd be completely down for making our relationship into something different (romantic, queerplatonic, etc.), but at the same time, I don't activity have a crush on them or want to push for a different relationship bc what if they don't feel the same way or don't know what queerplatonic relationships are.

Am I the only aro-spec person who switches between wanting a committed partnership, be it romantic, platonic, queerplatonic, etc, and wanting to be as far away from relationships as possible?

Was I the only aro-spec person who had the experience of thinking that I had crushes growing up, but looking back, they might not have been crushes because 1. I could never or only rarely name any traits that I liked about them (and those rare times that I could were traits that I simply admired), 2. I felt immense relief when they rejected me, or 3. I just wanted to have a crush, so I chose a person and consciously decided to develop feelings for them, not knowing that it doesn't work like that?

Something I recently realized that helped me understand my aro-spec identity is that my "crushes" that I can remember weren't actually fueled by romantic attraction for the person. They were actually fueled by attraction towards the idea of dating/liking them, but not actually them as a person. I wanted to find my soulmate and as soon as I found someone that I thought fit that ideal, I would start daydreaming about being with them, but I wasn't really attracted to them as a person, just my idealized version of them and the relationship. As a result, I couldn't really name any traits about those people that I liked, aside from surface level ones like, "funny," "nice," and "hardworking." And while I was aesthetically attracted to them, I never really fantasized about kissing them or being super romantic with them (aside from maybe hand-holding or hugging), and if I ever tried, it made me uncomfortable and felt like I was violating them. Did anyone else have a similar experience or is it just me?

"Do you want a boyfriend/girlfriend?" no i want a best friend/roommate/soulmate that I can go on silly adventures with and hang out with and have deep intellectual discussions with and we can be life partners without any of the romance stuff

J'ai l'impression qu'il y a aucune personnes aroace en france, je sais que non évidemment mais en une vingtaine d'années je n'en ai jamais rencontrées...

(À part un mec ace et une fille bi ace au lycée)

Honnêtement, je me sens seul.e à cause de la pression allonormative et amanormative en ce moment parce que je suis entouré.e que de personnes allos (et horny asf, elles me mettent mal à l'aise tous les jours 💀) dont beaucoup d'entre eux sont en couple.

Ça plus la télé et les réseaux sociaux, bref, internet et les représentations des allos dans la généralité. 😒

Ça m'étouffe et le fait de n'avoir aucune personne aroace dans mon entourage pour souffler de l'air frais et se comprendre sur ce sujet est frustrant...

Et tout ça me montre à quel point je veux tellement être en relation queer platonique avec une autre personne aroace encore plus que d'habitude...

Au moins en rencontrer une et être amis serait incroyable.

Anyway, j'avais besoin d'écrire pour extérioriser !

Proof That Jughead is Aromantic - Masterpost

*so we know he’s asexual in canon. but he could still feel romantic attraction!!1!1

what’s this? a screenshot from the writer’s twitter??? doesn’t prove anything. that’s just one comic. i’ll put an asterisk next to the comics by this guy to prove he’s the only one writing Juggie as aro.

i’m not convinced. that’s pretty open to interpretation; he’s probably interested

well… maybe that could mean he’s aro?

Keep reading