Alex Penkala - Blog Posts

Easy Company Sleepover??

The chaos

Heffron: EYYY WHO’S STILL UP?

Toye: *squints* Well me now, dipshit

Guarnere: SHH I need at least 10 hours if I’m gonna look fresh tomorrow

Talbert: Ok, seriously everyone simmer down, let’s just sleep

No one:

Webster: …What’s the meaning of life?

Liebgott: cAn wE nOt??

Shifty: Guys pls be quiet or Captain Winters will hear us

Luz: Wait turn the lights on, I can’t find Malarkey!

Malarkey: I’m under the bed!

Skinny: What the actual f—

Muck: That looks so fun! *gets under bed*

Penkala: Midnight pillow fight! *hits Gordon*

Gordon: Ow! What the hell is in your pillowcase? Fuck, I’m bleeding!

Roe: *asleep*

Christenson: Shhh did you guys hear that?

Speirs (outside peeping in the window): be silent.

Speirs: It’s like Malarkey, Muck, and Penkala all share one brain cell.

Malarkey: *cant think of a good comeback because it’s not his turn to use the brain cell*

Penkala: FOUR MONTHS!

Malarkey: What's wrong with him?

Muck, holding back laughter: Just wait-

Penkala: THAT'S HOW LONG YOU STOOD BY AND WATCHED ME WATER A FAKE PLANT-

Gene: I’m leaving- Nobody here except Winters has common sense or a regard for their own safety. 

The rest of Easy Company in the background:

@rayleighshughes​, our convos have given me inspiration that can last me until the end of time- how many times can i fucking thank you, ma’am??

Easy as random memes on my phone part 1:

talbert:

liebgott @ web:

malark, skip & penk:

german pow's & speirs:

babe:

buck:

lip, martin & luz (in that order):

winters about nix:

i keep shitting out shitty content on the daily. am i sorry? no not one bit 😎✌🏻

Easy Company in a food fight (1/?)

@indigosandviolets and I were chatting together about how Easy Company would have a food fight and this is what we came up with:

Liebgott: *uses his hershy chocolate syrup to spray people*

Guarnere and Perconte: *throwing the crappy spaghetti at each other*

Nixon isn't even in the food fight 'cause he's drinking all the alcohol

Malarkey starts throwing mash potatoes at people: i don't care if i start another potatoe famine, this is WAR

Winters staying in the kitchen and a handful of potatoes goes right by his head, he looks back it for a second, looks back at Malarkey and then slowly ducks under the counter

Spina, also drinking with Nixon: *looks at Babe* How are you still alive?

Babe, who has somehow not been touched by any food even though he’s standing on the tables: i have no idea!!

Doc is throwing baguettes: THIS IS FOR ALL THE TIMES YOU YALL DIDN'T GIVE ME SIZZORS

Speirs goes all Chuck Norris and he uses a rubber band to fling food. Let's say he does it David and Goliath style.

Speirs hits Bull right between the eyes, and Bull then proceeds to pick it off and pelt it at him

Welsh has the box of Lucky Charms cereal and making it rain: TASTE THE RAINBOW YOU BITCHES

Luz uses cookies as frisbees

Buck is going Rambo with the baloney

no one DARES hit Martin

Except Webster who almost hits Martin with a bratwurst sausage but Martin dodges like Matrix style

Malarkey somehow gets his hands on a whole head of lettuce

Penkala and Skip use Cheezits as ninja stars

i feel like there is a rule that Speirs cannot be left alone with Penkala and Skinny, because the latter too are marely children and they worship the ground Speirs walks on so it is incredible easy for him to talk them into doing something stupid

like i feel once Alex had to go the hospital because speirs was like “if you hit on something hard constantly, your bones will become stronger and you will suffer minimal injuries” and Alex straight up jumped out of the third floor window to test this

i’m here to share this screen cap with you all of penkala’s sassy ass eyebrow.

Skip Muck: How long are we going to let him do this?

Alex Penkala: Just give him a minute.

Don Malarkey: *is pushing a door clearly labelled pull*

Babe: You’re on a date with someone when they refer to guacamole as avocado jelly. What do you do?

Penkala: Bash their brains in.

Muck: Propose.

Luz: Bold of you to assume I’m on a date

Band Of Brothers Modern AU Headcanons

(No one asked for this, but you know what? I’m still gonna do it.)

The guys all live in the same apartment building.

Dick doesnt understand 99.9% of pop culture. You could probably show him a thirty minute PowerPoint about what “ok boomer” means and he still wouldn’t understand.

Dick listens to old country music and Nix absolutely hates it.

Nix works at the local animal shelter and wants to bring a dog home almost every day, but Dick always tells him that the two dogs they have are enough.

Liebgott listens to Indie music.

He’s also the bass guitarist in a band called The Flashbacks.

The Flashbacks mostly cover songs by The White Stripes, Pixies, Metric, Arctic Monkeys, and occasionally Cavetown, but they do perform a few songs that Liebgott has written, including one dedicated to Webster.

Guarnere plays the drums in The Flashbacks.

Webster writes poetry and everyone claims to hate it. (Spoiler alert: they don’t.)

Webster is Instagram famous. (He mostly posts aesthetic photos he’s taken or little bits of his poetry.)

Luz is a huge fan of all kinds of ghosts, demons, and cryptids, but his favorite would have to be Mothman. He even went to West Virginia to look for him once, but ended up not seeing him.

Luz knows all of the lyrics to Take On Me and Tainted Love and sings them when he gets bored. Sometimes he doesn’t even realize he’s doing it.

Toye has a black belt in Tae Kwon Do and used to go boxing with Guarnere every Saturday before they got in a car crash.

Eugene can sing and play piano. Like... Really well.

Eugene has a banana ball python named Peaches.

Babe used to paint a lot when he was a teenager, so now he’s really good at it. His favorite thing to paint is Eugene’s cat, Magnolia.

Lipton owns a small tea and coffee shop.

Lipton’s shop actually brought him and Ron together. Ron was a regular and always changed up his order to make it more complicated so he could stay longer and talk to Lip.

Ron has a rottweiler puppy named Dally and he carries him around in a puppy backpack. They have matching sunglasses.

Ron is a big Outsiders fan. He’s been to the museum in Tusla five times and read the book at least thirteen times. (And yes, he named his puppy after Dallas Winston.)

Shifty sends everyone a wholesome meme each morning to let them know that they are loved.

Shifty works at Lipton’s tea and coffee shop.

Muck eats tomatoes like apples and everyone’s extremely disgusted by it.

Malarkey, Muck, and Penkala like to hide tiny plastic alligators in front of everyone’s apartments. (They always put sharks in front of Webster’s apartment.)

Luz, Babe, Malarkey, Muck, and Penkala are in a group chat called “RIP Vine 😔😔😔” and each member sends a meme every day. It’s been going on for two years.

Everyone always goes to Buck’s football games, even though most of them don’t care for the sport, because they enjoy screaming at the other team.

Luz, Babe, And Talbert are Tik Tok famous.