Manessathevamp - Schizotypal Girly

Im Ngl I feel like what I do to myself isn’t even self harm like idk why I do it honestly it’s relaxing like when people drink tea or something I’m not aroused by it at all I’m not a masochist I can’t even explain half the shit I feel and when I try to people try to speak for me I hate that I hate people like is it really bad to harm yourself and torture yourself if it makes me feel relaxed and content?

I’m so tired of being scared to sleep I feel them watching me the entities

can you relate?

I have this issue I don’t like when people are affectionate with me it just disgusts me I don’t know why I legit feel uncomfortable

ancestry dna

I think the craziest thing about this month is when I did a ancestry kit on myself and found out I’m mixed in half white with a little bit of blood of indigenous in me I never would have thought I was half white to be honest

I’m probably going to be alone for the rest of my life I cannot trust people

I was crying yesterday I’m tired of having schizotypal personality disorder, I’m tired of accusing people of stuff, I’m tired of being paranoid, I’m tired of thinking people are doing rituals on me, I’m tired of thinning entities are watching me

Schizospec culture is not understanding why people demonize voices/hallucinations/delusions so much. They are just trying to keep me safe even if they aren't very good at it.

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Does anyone else torture themselves idk I might be self harming myself