In My Schizotypal Arc Don’t Approach Me

I want him to hug me so hard that my bones crack, I want him to love me so hard his heart is in pain when I’m away from him, when he kisses me I hope my lungs are in agony from being out of breath

Sometimes stpd is shame. Constant shame. Shame so intense it bleeds out from you, into the rest of the world, where no one is to be trusted, not humanity, not anyone you know, not even yourself.

Shame that defies “common reality," where no one is to be trusted because humanity is inherently sinister. Because everyone you know personally is going to watch you through cameras or kidnap you. They're watching you because they've noticed that there is something "off" about you, that you're inept or otherwise incompetent. And thats why they want to hurt you.

Stpd is to exist in two seemingly contradictory states all at the same time- constant anxiety, and constant apathy.

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i require a lot of love and attention to be functional

I was crying yesterday I’m tired of having schizotypal personality disorder, I’m tired of accusing people of stuff, I’m tired of being paranoid, I’m tired of thinking people are doing rituals on me, I’m tired of thinning entities are watching me

Either if you love or hate me cut me up

its not psychosis its divine knowledge this time

cum inside you while i tell you that you belong to me

I’ve been feeling an entity watching me for the past couple of weeks

Mother is always right she knows all

I’m tired I can’t do this anymore