Call Me Manipulative, But I Want Someone To Reach Their Hand Out To Me When I Start To Walk Away.

Call me manipulative, but I want someone to reach their hand out to me when I start to walk away.

I want to feel like I'm worth running after. I want to feel like I'm wanted.

More Posts from Inspiredtrans and Others

3 weeks ago

yeah so I don't wanna be heartless or anything, but genuinely get fucked lol. Classic case of "I wanted others to suffer, I never thought it would happen to *me*"

Sorry for the actual baby who may have to grow up facing discrimination due to this, but, as for the parents, lol. lmao, even

‘We were horrified’: parents heartbroken as baby girl registered as male
the Guardian
Parents told Nottinghamshire registrar’s error on birth certificate cannot be changed

A newborn baby girl will have to go through life with the wrong sex on her birth certificate after a registrar’s error, which her parents have been told they cannot change. Grace Bingham and her partner, Ewan Murray, were excited to register their first child at the Sutton-in-Ashfield Registration Office in Nottinghamshire last week. But, after nights of broken sleep, they failed to notice the registrar had written the wrong sex on the birth certificate until after it had been submitted. “We were horrified but assumed that, as we saw the mistake just a few seconds after it had happened, correcting it would be an easy matter,” said Murray. “But although the registrar apologised for her mistake – and the area manager also apologised – it turns out that birth certificates can’t be changed.”

this article is interesting because it demonstrates that cis people can very easily apply structural thinking to sex assignment - this couple immediately identifies that their daughter, having mistakenly been assigned male at birth by the registrar, will have administrative problems in employment, education, travel, and so on. they pretty adeptly identify the foundational role that sex assignment plays in the administrative and civil functions of a state, and how incorrect sex markers effectively produce a ‘rational’ reason for discrimination within these administrative and civil arenas:

The General Register Office (GRO), which is responsible for administering all civil registration in England and Wales, and the Home Office have both confirmed that Lilah’s birth certificate cannot be reissued, although an amendment can be made in the margin of the original document. But Bingham said this is not enough. “People reading a birth certificate might easily miss a tiny note in the margin – which means that Lilah could be regarded as male when she applies for school, her passport, for jobs – for everything that she needs a full birth certificate for.”

And given that this was published in The Guardian, this article makes zero mention as to why it’s impossible for this couple to receive an updated birth certificate with correct information (something the author notes was possible to do a year ago), but the reason is obviously transphobia. 

Now one might ask why there’s no exception for cis people whose birth certificates were recorded incorrectly at birth, but this reveals the instability of cissexualism. How would you determine who is a cis person with a mistaken birth certificate, versus a trans person who wants to change their mistaken sex assignment record? Sure, you could say well, this is an infant, of course she’s “really” “biologically” female (something the parents argue in the article as grounds for having their child’s birth certificate re-issued), but 1) that certainly can’t be argued for in all cases, 2) 'biological sex' is understood by medical doctors as alterable through hormones and surgery, which trans people are often required to undergo in order to change their records, and 3) binary sex assignment is already imprecise and discretionary, particularly if infants have sex characteristics that don’t conform to binary F/M assignment standards (which is part of how the category of intersex emerges, framing this failure to conform to state census categories as a biological defect - and in fact, many intersex people do not discover they are intersex until the onset of puberty or later, at which point they are even less in luck if they want to change their sex assignment - and if they don’t, if they are cis but have sex characteristics that do not conform to cis standards, they will be discriminated against anyway). 

Even setting aside the issue of transgender and intersex people for a moment, states fuck up all the time in administration! you've probably either experienced this directly or know someone who's had some kind of record fucked up by the government at some point in their life. If you get married they could fuck up changing your last name, fuck up your disability status, record your social insurance number wrong, print the wrong address on your driver’s license, fail to acknowledge you as a dependent when filing taxes, incorrectly mark you as having graduated when you’re still a student, fuck up your immigration paperwork, record your name wrong during immigration, etc etc into infinity, and this is not even getting into errors that occur when different levels of government pass information between one another. This level of administrative rigidity is purely to punish people who fail to perform cissexualism correctly, and in the case of this couple's child, the administrative error of the state is imputed to them as a personal failure that she and her parents will now have to deal with for the rest of their lives. 

I think the ultimate analysis is not that transphobia will become less precise and hit more "wrong" targets as it expands its reach, but that this is the exact same operational logic as all other liberal state measures - if you encounter a systemic issue, it’s your fault for not avoiding it, fuck you, go away. You’re poor because you’re lazy, you’re unhoused because you’re lazy, you’re disabled because you’re lazy, and your daughter is now administratively transsexual because you’re lazy. In this case, we don’t even need to assume the intentions of the state - they outright say it:

The family complained to the GRO but was told the mistake was their responsibility and could not be fully rectified. “The duty to ensure that information recorded in any particular entry is true is the responsibility of the person providing the information and not of the registrar general or the registrar recording the birth,” the GRO said.

7 months ago

"minors can't know their (gender) identity!!11!!!1!" but they'll make you choose a college degree that'll affect the rest of your life at like 17. Sometimes earlier when high school subjects/grades are relevant + AP classes.

If you're a minor you don't know your identity. You're a he/they so you're a girl. You'll come to realize you're not actually trans in a few years and just do it for attention.

maybe stfu and leave me alone about my gender because it’s none of your business, thanks <3


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7 months ago

I'm not saying I'm mentally ill, but today I bought a new teddy bear because I had been looking at it for a couple weeks and finally caved into the temptation. Yet the moment I put it down on my bed, I felt an overwhelming urge of guilt and disgust and the need to throw it away and apologize to my old, trusty teddy. And now the new one won't stop looking at my with its devilish eyes and I actually want to get rid of it even though it's like brand-new but I also DO NOT want to touch that thing anymore.


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8 months ago

No you don’t understand me calling you afab isn’t me calling you female it’s me just referring to an event that happened in your life - where you were assigned female. Don’t question why I never call you a man only a “afab trans person”. I’m not misgendering you and if you think I am then you have internalized transphobia you need to work out.

8 months ago

being a trans man sucks bcs you experience both misogyny and the challenges that come with being marginalized men, while constantly being denied that you experience either. youre a man only when it can be used against you. youre a 'failed woman' otherwise.

7 months ago

New missed childhood memory unlocked

Piss on an electric fence.

5 months ago

@ anyone who says "I'd call a cis man girl too", I'd like to see you try that in a group of straight gym bros

the second a trans man fucks up, other queer/trans people start calling him "girl" and going ok well its gender neutral. its slang. like how dumb do you think people are to fall for that

6 months ago

I need fellow friends who are also struggling. Doesn't matter online or offline but I'm tired of venting to my friends about how hard it is to juggle all my responsibilities in a body that's actively trying to not be alive, only to hear "damn that sucks" or "I believe in you" when you know they live with loving parents who provide everything for them, and don't have to put up with a body that's mentally and almost physically falling apart.

Of course I'm happy for those people but I don't think people fully grasp how much dysphoria, depression brain damage, and a broken relationship with your parents, sets you backwards in life. And tbh I need friends who can relate to at least 2/3 of those things just so we can talk about our shitty problems while having fun idec what.

please hmu


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inspiredtrans - Naamloos
Naamloos

Trans man, 19 years old, on T and post top, stealth in day to day life. This is my blog to post about trans stuff, as well as other queer stuff sometimes.

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