One Time I Dreamt - Blog Posts

i had a fever dream in autocad last night (don’t ask, it’s unfortunately a common occurrence) where i was for some reason tasked with creating floor plans for aziraphels bookshop, unfortunately (due to what i’m assuming was miracled room extensions) the shop didn’t abide by the laws of physics and was literally impossible to draft. i woke up in a cold sweat at 3am. fell back asleep. and continued the exact same goddamn dream.

I can't believe home depot literally produced a wildly successful science fiction musical and we all just pretend it didn't happen. on one hand yes it had a boring white guy main character but like.... home depot just... Made it? And it had shit ton of box office sales? and no one even talks about this. this is like avatar (2009) all over again

Being a non-lucid dreamer is so fucking weird

Like, I just had a dream where I was at the mall with my dad (normal enough), then I suddenly found myself in the makeup section trying out foundation for some reason?? And the foundation were sealed in these plastic bags that you had to rip into like a bag of chips, but it just didn't spill??

And I was like "Yeah, that's normal."

Then we're at checkout, paying for groceries and my vacuum sealed bag of foundation when the police arrive??? And two of my friends were there and helpfully gave me the context on why the police were here for me. Apparently I committed grand theft auto at some point, and that I'm under arrest

And I just "Yeah, that sounds like something I'd do. Makes sense."

And when I was in my stolen vehicle with my dad, I woke up as soon as an officer pulled me over

I had a dream my parents got a cat called mustard (one of those patchy looking brown/black and orange ones? Tortoiseshell I think) and we were driving somewhere and we drove across some train tracks but I don't think it was an actual crossing because my parents were being shady as hell about it but it was near a the stations I'd of been to a couple of times in my dreams.

We were visiting libraries to get a book and they didn't have it but the second library said they would have it in a couple days and also the librarian who was also a priest was asking me if I knew this girl and I was like yeah? So he showed me my emails and there was a bunch from her asking for details about a meet up except it had already happened. So we went home, back the way we came across the train tracks.

I'd been leaving the cat alone because I was pretty sure it didn't like me but also so as not to overwhelm it and I fell asleep once and was crowding its space when I woke up so I cuddled it a bit but left it alone because it was acting weird and its mouth was being held open uncomfortably near my neck.

So I had to check on the cat because the train tracks were a bumpy ride and it was fine but afterwards we stopped for a pee break or something (one of my parents left the car) and I tried to say hi to the cat again and it tried to kill me, like it was sizing up my throat before and everything to see if it could do it and then it bit me and it hurt so I wrenched it's jaws open but I couldn't hold it for long because it was strong and when I let go it tried to snap down but I dodged and grabbed its muzzle which was now too long to be a cats and I was struggling and yelling for help and my parents were like "what do you need help with? What are you doing? If you could just *explain*"

And then I woke up

The fact that this somehow got into a YouTube compilation with art

I saw an ad for My Little Pony Equestria Girls: 2cool4school. Twilight Sparkle was wearing sunglasses and throwing gang signs. My only thought was, “So this is what the world has come to.”

@one-time-i-dreamt of you 🍒

Good morning

This reminds me of a dream I had a few days ago! I hope it’s worth the long read.

So the dream begins with me at some kinda school that had a problem with mean students. I got into a fight with a guy which got us sent to counseling (in this world it’s basically detention and school "therapy" smashed into one) Now for a bit of context this world was like semi-magical. People had powers but they weren't really paid attention to. The counselor had us go in a circle say something we liked/loved, and I of course said "dragons". They all looked at me funny and I couldn't tell if because they had heard me say it too many times or if dragons were a weird thing to like. The counselor had me explain myself. Then, a giant blue dragon came down to the school to ask for my location, which for some reason caused everybody else to panic. The counselor told me that it wasn't safe for me to be here (as if it was horrible that a dragon was interested in me??) and told me to run.

Now I walked off for a bit and looked at my options: heaven and hell. Heaven was in the clouds and had wing imagery as you would expect. I don't remember too many details. Hell was more unique though. It was kind of like an rpg game, where you'd spawn in a low "level" area and you could move around to try and get stronger. The starting area reminds me of hot spring pools but if they were in the Nether and had lava instead of water.

I ended up choosing Hell because unlike Heaven you could choose your fate there. (Like in Heaven you wouldn't really have a goal to achieve while in Hell you could have something to work towards?) Hell was pretty nice ngl. It wasn't hot and there wasn't a lot of danger aside from the occasional imp. Most of the souls allowed to wander around weren't bad people either. Bad people were trapped in cages, usually surrounded by imps tormenting them I almost immediately ran into a group of high "level" demons and they took a liking to me. I asked them for help cause I wanted to get out of the starting area and they agreed to help me. They gave me instructions to take this special BBQ sauce to a demon who was in his restaurant at the time. [Demon was definitely a mafia boss or some shit] "If he starts getting grumpy and cursing then RUN. But if he doesn't say/do anything then you're in the clear." They take me to this guys restaurant which I think was a To-Go Mexican restaurant. (According to the demons the drive thru was new).

They handed over the special BBQ sauce while they taking their own orders. The dream ended shortly after that. Let it be known that the special BBQ sauce wasn't code for anything, the demon just had a passion for unique barbeque sauces. The other noteworthy thing is that the Devil was an axolotl with human legs and arms and a bowl cut mullet. He had the vibe of a very energetic old man. (Which I found to be another pro of Hell, the Devil seemed friendly!)

I want a story where the angels didn't fall, they jumped. they clipped their own wings, knowing their Master wouldn't have a use or a need for them once they were damaged and less-than-holy. they could not defeat the Tyrant who exerted absolute control over their lives, so they abandoned heaven their homeland in exchange for independence, accepting exile as its own form of freedom. and hell is just the place where all unwanted things are sent--be they angels or souls who just will not obey.

the other day I had this weird dream where someone broke into my house with a ski mask on, like with two eye holes and a mouth, and I was like, 'oh hell no' so obviously instead of calling the police I grabbed my sword but I haven't sharpened it yet so it's just blunt painful steel. so I bludgeon this guy in the neck until he goes off to join Hogwarts if you know what I mean and when i finish I'm like 'let's see who it is' and I pull off his mask and it was the president of United states, like it wasn't a real president it was just dream logic but then I woke up