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how do i tell her i made it?
all those nights dreaming of what waking up might feel like. all those mornings still stuck in a dream.
how do i tell her that every week day i wake up at six to greet the blue haze outside my window while i dance to the radio station and put on way too much highlighter?
all those hours longing for satisfaction. all those minutes longing for routine.
how do i tell her my days are full of a life which i live?
all those poems praying for my flame. all those prayers poeticizing the mundane.
I saw you looking
So why did you say you didn't care
why look at something you dont like
instead look at the trees blowing in the air
I caught you looking
and i caught the blush in ur cheeks
the soft smile on your lips
like the cutest little geek
I noticed you not looking
so i tried to forget
it wasnt all that hard
but then you had to look again
this time your eyes were lower
and i wouldnt have minded but
i saw you looking
then you said u didnt care
Is this the end of my chapter or merely the beginning? I have been reminded of my past and promised my future. Nothing hangs in the balance yet everything sits on edge. I know I am not a main character and I don't believe myself to even be a regular but I've felt it recently. I saw reminders of the me that once was, the me that was broken down stuck back there. But I'm not going back right? I refuse to go back there yet it seems inevitable, the signs are taunting me to go. Or perhaps the signs are pushing me to go start a beginning or is it pushing me to go finish an ending? I know I'm crazy but thats not the point. The point is that I can't tell where I have begun and I can't see where I will end.
Basic starting premise for another story that takes place in my multiverse
An ageless loli Neko-Kin ( Cat-Girl ) professor along with their mysterious femme fatal alien body-guard, a queer exiled vampire noble and their ghostly former demon-hunter companion walk into out-of-the-way shire-like village during the harvest festival where they intended to have a nice jovial night of drinking and fun only to have the night interrupted by the arrival of two terrified young children on the verge of death who flee into the festival pleading for help to save their mother from a monster they claim has taken over their home and trapped their mother inside. The village elders request that the 4 strangers ( The professor, her body-guard, the vampire noble, and their ghostly companion ) go and aid the children in the rescuing of their mother and defeat the monster. One of the village residents named Oskar Lochlan ( an Anam-Forge Gunslinger ) with a disturbing past agrees to join them in aiding the children and so together the group sets out as the children lead the way back to their house that dwells along the side of long-forgotten path on which no one ever travels anymore.
P.S. = I am always looking for those who are interested in helping me create something beautiful, bring ideas to life and hopefully expand the amount of LGBTQIA+ media out there at the same time. If you are interested or would like to talk then please contact me here on Tumblr. Thank you all for your time.
Here is a brief description of another part of my multiverse in which all my writings take place.
ESCAPING HOME:
Written by
Lillian Ashcroft
22 November 2021
A small group of super-powered kids and teens are forced to fight for their lives after an evil corporation known as Xen-Vulleriss invades locks down and kills all the adults in their small island town. Xen-Vulleriss is drawn to the town by the youngest of the kids accidentally using his devastating power at school during an altercation with some school staff resulting in the kid being taken into custody and placed in the local lock-up. During the night Xen-Vulleriss invades in hopes of capturing the all super-powered kids in the town. Xen-Vulleriss proceeds to kill all the adults in town leaving it up to the older kids in the town to protect the younger kids as they try to escape their island home and go get help from the outside world. At the end of the story, the group of survivors will make discoveries that will change the course of human history forever as dark truths are revealed and mysterious events begin to play out on a global scale.
This story is intended to be part of an ever-expanding cinematic universe that deals heavily with ideas and themes ranging from Multiversal conflict and inter-dimensional travel to concepts such as aliens and eldritch gods. Themes regarding the LGBTQIA+ community will also play a heavy role in this cinematic multiverse.
Architectural Words of High-Arcana
This just some words used my the Architects / Gods of my mythos ( The Piper Wars mythos ) to magical control reality. Elementus ( Elemental ) Words: Aiero = Air / Wind Anam = Soul / Spirit Cré = Earth Chronoss = Time Codexus = Digi-Materia / Digital Information Derlana = Electricity Hemoss = Blood Gravtoss = Gravity Lann = Light / Photo Machina = Machines Magnes = Magnetism Matara = Matter / Solid-Material Narcess = Self Necross = Necrotic-Energy / Death Ogher = Ice / Cryonic-Energy Psychiss = Mind Radioss = Radiation Aqiss = Water Tine = Fire / Flame Umbriss = Darkness / Shadow Vitia = Life / Vitality Weapia = Weapon / Implement Vlles = Flesh Silvarali = Silver-Light / Divine Light / Luciferian Light Formus ( Forming ) Words / Actoss (Action ) Words: Armeri = Armor / Shell Ascedor = Rise / Ascend Devos = Deform / Breakdown Dominostrass = Dominate / Control Fayda = Find / Locate Gail = Vibrate / Pulsate Paraza = Bind / Restrain Ga = Go Imprusa = Imprision / Cage Invetia = Invert Kinde = Cone Materia = Materialize Mendri = Mend / Repair Phallicia = Penis / Phallus Pillerum = Pillar / Column Pellta = Pull / Drag Ripola = Ripple / Wave Shaw = Shield Shuriko = Shuriken Straka = Strike / Melee Vortoss = Vortex Zeth = Nebulate / Mist / Fog Targeting Words: Ven = Self / Me Ver = Their ( Targeted area of effect ) Vie = Them ( Unnamed designated group ) Vor = Them ( Single unnamed target )
So I have a question for any writers out there...
How do you write a workable story without the dimension of ‘place’? What I mean more fully is. How can you write story from the point of view of omniscient beings, who exist and life in a place so devoid from any reality that it is effectively everywhere and nowhere at the same time. How to you tell / write a story about the actions and lives of these individuals from their perspective when they effectively are existing without the foundational concept of ‘place’? I know this is a hard / weird question but I really need to know so any answers would be deeply appreciated.
Ways I Show a Character is In Love But Doesn't Know It Yet...
This one’s for the emotional masochists writing the slowest of burns, where your readers are screaming “just kiss already!” by chapter twenty... I Love and Hate you... ♥
They compare everyone else to the person… and everyone else comes up short. Even when they’re not consciously doing it. No one’s laugh is as warm. No one’s eyes crinkle that way.
They remember the weirdest little things about them. Birthdays? Whatever. But that time they snorted laughing at a dumb joke? Locked and loaded.
They feel weirdly guilty when flirting with someone else. Like they’re cheating… except they’re not even dating. Or are they? Or—ugh, feelings are the worst.
They notice every damn detail when the other person isn’t around. "They’d like this song." "This smells like their shampoo." "I wonder what they'd say about this weird squirrel."
They use weird, overly specific compliments. Not “You look good,” but “That color makes your eyes look like a storm in a novel I’d cry over.”
They get weirdly intense about that person being hurt or in danger. Like, irrationally intense. "He’s just a friend," they say while planning to murder anyone who makes them cry.
They feel safer around them than anyone else, and it freaks them out. Like: “I’m always on guard. Except with you. That’s... suspicious.”
Vulnerability Confessions
"Some days, I don’t even like myself. But you, you look at me like I’m worth loving."
"I act like I’m fine, but if you left, I don’t think I’d recover."
"Loving me isn’t easy, I know that. But I swear, I love you in a way no one else ever will."
"I don’t need you to fix me. Just sit with me in the dark until I can find the light."
"You make me feel seen in a way that scares the hell out of me."
"I’m terrified of losing you, but even more terrified of never telling you how much you mean to me."
There's a girl with my name, we don't look the same but we both huddle under covers when it rains. There's a girl who is almost my age, yet we have the same moon sign and we always forget the time. There's a girl reading what I write who comments every night and I can only hope that life treats you kindly, this girl will one day be in the ground and so will I, but I hope as you age you'll shed those debilitating fears that hold you back and hopefully we'll have lived a life of joy and mostly happy tears.
If you’re having writers block…READ!!!! CONSUME MEDIA
I feel like I don’t hear that given enough as advice for writers block..just read? Watch tv? Movies? Find inspiration in media.
Writers block is a lack of inspiration, so go collect more.
Ways to get to know your characters:
These are just some ways I do t, feel free to add your own tips!
Google sheets. Just google sheets. Make a sheet for your story and create categories to fill on your character's traits. Very simple example:
2. Making Pinterest boards. Listen maybe I'm biased because I'm on Pinterest more than I'm on Tumblr and it gives me the most intense nostalgia of any website/app ever, but it may be my most helpful tactic. This works in plenty of ways. Making a board for one story's character designs and making individual categories for each character in that board. Making individual board for each character's design, aesthetic, personality, whatever. No example but I think you get it.
3. I might sound like you lame ass ELA teacher from 9th grade or whatever when I say this, but plot mountains are really helpful. Now I don't mean the plot plot for all you, "I just start writing and am as surprised as my characters when everything goes to shit." writers like me, I'm talking about an internal plot. To explain, there is an external plot (exposition, rising action, climax, etc.) and internal plot (character development,) making external plot mountains isn't helpful for me because I want freedom in my writing. I know where it starts and sometimes where it stops and that's good enough, but writing the development of a character is good to outline just for the foreshadowing and because CHARACTER FLAWS ARE FUCKING IMPORTANT. (Cue the one post about eating mayo packets)
4. Mark their birthdays in your calendar. Like google calendar or whatever the fuck you use. Anyway, dedicate their birthday to just getting to know them. Make a wish list of presents they'd like, or a slideshow about the party activities they'd like, or a pinterest board about what their party theme would be. It's fun, I swear.
5. Make lists of a bunch of stuff. Their flaws, their strengths, their favourite thing, their pet peeves, their favourite people, their pets, their little quirks they have, etc.
6. Physical objects. Make them, buy them, or just stuff you already have. Make a little box of things they'd like or have. Treat them like a friend. A real person. It'll inspire you to write or draw more and you can come up with little backstories on the items.
7. Give them a catchphrase. Even if they never say it, it's cute. I like them. Most people do, I think.
I've been making a series I hope to post on YouTube. I won't go into detail but y'know I think it's cool. Anyway it's really just a me and a few friends project. I'm writing the scripts and doing the animation (yes it's animated) while also voice acting like 14 characters. My friend is voice acting the rest and will be helping with the editing. Anyway that's just exposition for the funny part of the post.
My friend was asking me where as this was going and I vaguely described the season 1 ending to them. They asked for specifics and stuff and I was just sitting there like, "Mx. do you think I know the specifics? I'm as in the dark as you are! I start writing and shit happens. Until we get to the one scene that inspired my writing trip I do not know shit until I edit it! We'll find out together! :)"
So yeah that's my writing process, what's yours? It's probably less chaaotic is what I would say if I didn't know what writers are like.
For Future Reference...thank you Original Poster for creating this.
Things Real People Do in Dialogue (For Your Next Story)
Okay, let’s be real—dialogue can make or break a scene. You want your characters to sound natural, like actual humans talking, not robots reading a script. So, how do you write dialogue that feels real without it turning into a mess of awkward pauses and “ums”? Here’s a little cheat sheet of what real people actually do when they talk (and you can totally steal these for your next story):
1. People Interrupt Each Other All the Time In real conversations, nobody waits for the perfect moment to speak. We interrupt, cut each other off, and finish each other's sentences. Throw in some overlaps or interruptions in your dialogue to make it feel more dynamic and less like a rehearsed play.
2. They Don’t Always Say What They Mean Real people are masters of dodging. They’ll say one thing but mean something totally different (hello, passive-aggressive banter). Or they’ll just avoid the question entirely. Let your characters be vague, sarcastic, or just plain evasive sometimes—it makes their conversations feel more layered.
3. People Trail Off... We don’t always finish our sentences. Sometimes we just... stop talking because we assume the other person gets what we’re trying to say. Use that in your dialogue! Let a sentence trail off into nothing. It adds realism and shows the comfort (or awkwardness) between characters.
4. Repeating Words Is Normal In real life, people repeat words when they’re excited, nervous, or trying to make a point. It’s not a sign of bad writing—it’s how we talk. Let your characters get a little repetitive now and then. It adds a rhythm to their speech that feels more genuine.
5. Fillers Are Your Friends People say "um," "uh," "like," "you know," all the time. Not every character needs to sound polished or poetic. Sprinkle in some filler words where it makes sense, especially if the character is nervous or thinking on their feet.
6. Not Everyone Speaks in Complete Sentences Sometimes, people just throw out fragments instead of complete sentences, especially when emotions are high. Short, choppy dialogue can convey tension or excitement. Instead of saying “I really think we need to talk about this,” try “We need to talk. Now.”
7. Body Language Is Part of the Conversation Real people don’t just communicate with words; they use facial expressions, gestures, and body language. When your characters are talking, think about what they’re doing—are they fidgeting? Smiling? Crossing their arms? Those little actions can add a lot of subtext to the dialogue without needing extra words.
8. Awkward Silences Are Golden People don’t talk non-stop. Sometimes, they stop mid-conversation to think, or because things just got weird. Don’t be afraid to add a beat of awkward silence, a long pause, or a meaningful look between characters. It can say more than words.
9. People Talk Over Themselves When They're Nervous When we’re anxious, we tend to talk too fast, go back to rephrase what we just said, or add unnecessary details. If your character’s nervous, let them ramble a bit or correct themselves. It’s a great way to show their internal state through dialogue.
10. Inside Jokes and Shared History Real people have history. Sometimes they reference something that happened off-page, or they share an inside joke only they get. This makes your dialogue feel lived-in and shows that your characters have a life beyond the scene. Throw in a callback to something earlier, or a joke only two characters understand.
11. No One Explains Everything People leave stuff out. We assume the person we’re talking to knows what we’re talking about, so we skip over background details. Instead of having your character explain everything for the reader’s benefit, let some things go unsaid. It’ll feel more natural—and trust your reader to keep up!
12. Characters Have Different Voices Real people don’t all talk the same way. Your characters shouldn’t either! Pay attention to their unique quirks—does one character use slang? Does another speak more formally? Maybe someone’s always cutting people off while another is super polite. Give them different voices and patterns of speech so their dialogue feels authentic to them.
13. People Change the Subject In real life, conversations don’t always stay on track. People get sidetracked, jump to random topics, or avoid certain subjects altogether. If your characters are uncomfortable or trying to dodge a question, let them awkwardly change the subject or ramble to fill the space.
14. Reactions Aren’t Always Immediate People don’t always respond right away. They pause, they think, they hesitate. Sometimes they don’t know what to say, and that delay can speak volumes. Give your characters a moment to process before they respond—it’ll make the conversation feel more natural.