Rumplestiltskin - Blog Posts

Oh yeah, remember that?

Gold vs. Rumple

(nsfw under cut, GN!reader)

Mr. Gold who likes chocolate, but Rumple hates it

Mr. Gold who is a morning person, but Rumple who is a night person

Mr. Gold who likes winter, Rumple who likes summer

Mr. Gold who has attachments, Rumple who doesn't

Mr. Gold who gives kisses, Rumple who gives bites

Mr. Gold who is a service/power bottom, Rumple who doesn't have sex

Mr. Gold who likes doing, Rumple who likes watching

Mr. Gold who is semi tame, Rumple who isn't tame at all (watching others)

Mr. Gold who is an aftercare god - fav tea, snack, a bath, pj's, blankets, whatever you want/need on stand by-, Rumple who never does aftercare - just kinda leaves after all i said or done.

Both who need/want clear consent, love making you beg of anything

Both who love hearing the noises you make

Both who like marking - receiving, seeing, making them

Gold x M!reader (NSFW under the cut)

Mr. Gold who gave up hoping for a change. 20 years spent the exact same way. Nothing changed, or moved on.

Mr. Gold who was rather ruthless with his rent deals, and kept to himself outside of it.

Mr. Gold who went to collect his rent money, and found a new tenant. Young, fresh faced, new to town. Stumbled into it one their way away from the big city.

Mr. Gold, who for all intents and purposes needed to do a thorough interview to make sure said new tenant could pay rent on time.

Mr. Gold who learned everything about his new tenant. No one knew has come to Storybrooke for as long as it existed.

Mr. Gold who quickly fell for the young new mind. Hired him to help run the pawn shop so he could have a day off every now and then.

Mr. Gold who slowly entices this new tenant into a favorable position. Who quickly gets way over his head and underestimates him.

Mr. Gold that quickly learns his new employee knew every way to fuck him under the sun.

Mr. Gold who almost gets worried his neighbors overheard how loud he was, moans and shouts and beg.

Mr. Gold who never begged untill it was for you cock, stretching and filling him.

Misthaven's #1 fashion designer

Yes

the difference between rumplestiltskin and literally all the other dark ones is so funny to me. like. rumplestiltskin as the dark one is this campy, flamboyant, giggling, mischievous imp of a guy, who traded the dark one's typical ominous dark robe for skin-tight leather, thigh high boots, and a magical blowout. was he like that before he became the dark one? no. not at all. were any of the previous dark ones like that? also no. were either of the two dark ones after him like that? again, no. there's no actual real given reason for why he behaves like that. he just does. and i adore him for it

Exactly. Regina just didn’t give him a first name. Gold has no friends, and is only a landlord, so she didn’t think he’d need one.

Sorry I didn't get this posted on the 12th, I was having a lot of computer issues and wasn't able to be around as much as I wanted to be. Have it now (as well as a bonus Neal one) as a Valentine's Day treat!

The pose(TM).

Can you tell I’m rewatching OUAT again? I was obsessed with it when I was twelve, so it is therefore a life-long obsession. Sorry, I don’t make the rules.

(Considering I was also obsessed with Twilight in year six, I would say that this is the better, mildly less problematic option…)

Rumple + whatever is going on with his hands (s1–3)

Sparkly golden disco lizard - ha! That’s the best thing I’ve ever heard.

I had similar thoughts, especially because i prefer Rumplestiltskin when he’s scaly (and actually has a personality), because he’s so much more fun.

We all know that Rumple's got lots of self-loathing, among other things connected with the way he looked in the EF because it represents how inhuman and monstrous he is.

Now imagine for some reason he and Belle end up back in the EF at some point in the show... or maybe EF 2 in S7...

And Rumple grows scaly and golden and sparkly and lizardy again and he hides from Belle because he is ashamed, because he can't bear to see the expression on her face when she sees the reminder of who he truly is...

But when Belle eventually finds him - because she always does - she takes one look at him and just... smiles and runs up to him and envelopes him in a tight hug and has the audacity to sigh contently against a very baffled Rumple.

Because as much as she loves his human form, as much as she loves him in any form, period, this Rumple - the sparkly golden disco lizard - is her Rumple, the one she met first, the one she got to know first, the one she fell in love with first.

And she missed him... she really did.

These two in their best form. I love enchanted forest Rumbelle so much, I miss them…

average t4t couple tbh

So years ago I watched Once Upon a Time and had made it through season 3, so I thought I would catch up.

First of all:

I'm in love. Don't even care.

Second of all, and I'm only on episode 4 as I write this so I might be reading this wrong, but how is Mr. Gold going to swear on his son's grave that he's going to do better and still be doing sketchy shit and being secretive. I mean I get it. You can't change all at once. But he can't pick up the phone and tell someone about whatever his relationship with the Ice Queen is about. He couldn't give Emma a call and tell her about Hook's hand situation, which is playing out before my very eyes?

He didn't just promise Neal he would be better, he said he would be the hero and person Neal died believing he could be. Come on man.

FACTS.

“The Crocodile”

Okay. I was typing a reblog and it somehow became a rant/spiel, so I’m making a whole post about it.

“The Crocodile” Episode? I know a this isn’t exactly an unpopular opinion, but I’mma say it anyway.

Hook and Milah. Had. It. COMING.

Granted - Hook became cool eventually. But I hated him for a LOT of the series on the grounds of his first impression alone.

Like it’s one thing to run off with a man’s wife. Rumple and Milah weren’t in love and the marriage wasn’t a good one. She put zero effort into their family and taking her off their hands may arguably have been better for everyone.

Seriously. Fuck Milah.

Spinner Rumple tried so hard to be a good husband and father, or at least to make their family work in a loveless marriage, and he deserved better.

But in spite of that, what Hook did to him on the ship crossed so many lines and he totally deserved to get owned for it.

Let’s review:

Concerned husband boards a pirate ship to beg for his wife back, thinking she’s been abducted. Right off the bat: That right there took courage. It always pisses me off when OUAT characters call Spinner Rumple a coward, because he really wasn’t. The world put him through it and he was doing his damn best. Just showing up to the ship of bloodthirsty pirates, knowing that literally all he could do was beg and hope for the best, took guts.

Back to Hook. So this poor guy shows up to ask for his wife back unharmed. And shy of actually hurting Rumple, Hook decides to do quite possibly the cruelest thing he could have done:

Keep letting the spinner think that his wife had been taken against her will and that she was being raped by the whole crew.

If Milah was in on the lie, then in my opinion SHE was the cowardly one here. Not Rumple. You want to abandon your disabled husband and son to run off and live the high life with a pirate? Own your shit.

But no. Instead they pushed the blame onto Rumple and gaslit this poor man into thinking it was somehow his fault.

Yeah - Rumple didn’t pick up the sword when Hook challenged him to a duel over Milah. But let’s think about that for a sec shall we?

We have Rumplestiltskin: An older wool spinner with a disability. Who can’t walk all that well WITH his walking stick - much less without it, on a boat, and during a fight with a sword. Which he’s barely held in his life unless you count the crash-course he got as fodder- I mean a new recruit, when he was drafted into the Ogres War.

Versus Captain Jones: A younger, taller, stronger pirate. An experienced swordsman, comfortable on a ship, and with two good legs. AND with a loyal crew of OTHER strapping pirates who would probably kill Rumple even if by some miracle he DID take Hook by surprise or something.

So really, Rumple had two options here.

Option A: Refuse to fight the bloodthirsty pirate, leave with your life but without your wife, and return home to your now motherless son.

Option B: Fight the bloodthirsty pirate, probably die or at least get badly injured (which could be death within a few days-weeks anyway given his financial situation and living conditions), the pirate takes your wife anyway, and your son is left an orphan who may or may not ever know what happened to you.

So there was no realistic scenario here where he fights off the pirates like a dashing hero and carries his wife home.

What else was he supposed to do?!

Rumplestiltskin is extremely smart. He always was. He knows when to pick his battles and he would have known all of that at a glance.

Refusing to fight wasn’t cowardice. It was common sense.

And yet Hook, this mothafucka, who must have realized all of this too and put Rumple in this situation in the first place, had the gall to act disgusted about it when Rumple refused to “fight like a man.” And then gaslit him into thinking that he was a coward and a fool for making what was obviously the more rational decision.

Now Hook is a pirate. I never would have expected much from him. But that’s no excuse. What he did was fucked. And karma is a bitch.

Stupid Game = Stupid Prize

And yes I know this is a pretty commonly held opinion so it shouldn’t be new to anyone but I rewatched that episode recently and needed to get this off my chest. 😤

Inktober 2023 #10. Fortune

Extras Below!:

Regina: 😈👿👊🔥

Rumple: 😌🙄😴💅

Everyone please read Gilded by Marissa Meyer immediately

I want to have a discussion with someone