Batbros - Blog Posts

Gotham minimum wage is like 5x the national average to discourage people from getting PhDs

tim showing duke around the cave for the first time: there’s jason’s memorial case, and - oh, here’s dicks old nightwing suit, we call it discowing cuz frankly it’s kinda —

duke: it’s beautiful.

tim: what.

duke: all those bright colors, i bet he pulled in this suit

tim: i mean, i guess he was dating starfire, but she’s not exactly a normal girl —

duke: im gonna have to take notes, maybe dick will help design my suit?

dick wrapping his arms around duke and leading him away to discuss suit ideas: i’m glad someone appreciates my artistic eye

jason: imma kms, there’s two now

Dick Grayson? You mean Eldest Daughter Syndrome Incarnate?

Dick, from another room: Barbara, I swear to GOD I will evescarate you, if you call me that AGAIN!

(Honestly like father like son)

Incorrect Batfam Quotes

Jason: Hey Pixie Boots!

Damian: Call me that again and I will remove your organs in alphabetical order. Any questions?

Jason: Yes, actually. Which alphabet?

Damian: *attacks

inaccurate Batfam quotes #28

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟBatfam Twitter, Otherwise known as: Idiots with Internet PART 2

Bruce Wayne🗸 @ BrucieWayneOfficial

@ Diamondsareacatsbestfriend Doesn't she look beautiful in her dress for tonights Gala? IMG.29ghv260na.JPG

20k Likes 12.7k retweeted 23.9k Commets

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Selina Kyle @ Diamondsareacatsbestfriend

@BrucieWayneOfficial Oh, you.

12.2k Likes 9.8k retweeted 8.7k Comments

Dick GAYson🗸 @ FlyingGraysonJr

Hey, join me on insta live later to see if we can convince Dami to put on a panguin onsie! LOL So cute

24.3k Likes 20.7k retweeted 10.3k Comments

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Damian Wayne🗸 @ TheBloodSon

@FlyingGraysonJr Grayson, what are you talking about. I will NOT be putting on that abomination.

23.1k Likes 12.3k retweeted 9.7k Comments

Jay Son🗸 @ zombierebellion

20k retweets and I shoot @ sleepwhenimdead with a tranq dart

32k Likes 28.7k retweeted 30.8k Comments

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Jay Son🗸 @ zombierebellion

@ sleepwhenimdead The people have spoken. OKAY TIMMY, TIME FOR BEDDY-BYE

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Tim Drake🗸 @ sleepwhenimdead

@ zombierebellion HOW COULD YOU ALL, I THOUGHT YOU CARED

34.9k Likes 24.3k retweeted 40.1k Comments

Tim Drake🗸 @ sleepwhenimdead

I woke from being tranqued and it's been 53 hours...

34.8k Likes 29.8k retweeted 30.2k Comments

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Dick GAYson🗸 @ FlyingGraysonJr

At least you slept.

32.2k Likes 12.3k retweeted 9.8 Comments

Damian Wayne🗸 @ TheBloodSon

Despite being the most heinous article of clothing I have ever seen, the material is quite comfortable. But I'm never wearing it again.

35.3k Likes 30.1k retweeted 33.4k Comments

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Dick GAYson🗸 @ FlyingGraysonJr

@ TheBloodSon But you looked so cute as a panguin! IMG.92htmil83.JPG

37.4k Likes 37.4k retweeted 40.2k Comments

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Jay Son🗸 @ zombierebellion

@ FlyingGraysonJr @ TheBloodSon looks normal like that. Minus the sour face.

22.4k Likes 12.9k retweeted 19.2k Comments

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Tim Drake🗸 @ sleepwhenimdead

@ FlyingGraysonJr @ TheBloodSon @ zombierebellion he looks so precious even though he's going to kill us all..

20k Likes 18.2k retweeted 22.4k Comments

inaccurate Batfam quotes #21

Batboys as D&D Races...

Dick: Bard-- obviously-- and Genasi, since he's decended from Gypsies.

Jason: Paladin Tiefling.

Tim: Warlock Kalashtar.

Damian: Elvish Assassin Rougue, class Eladrin for his unpredictable behavior.

inaccurate Batfam quotes #20

The batfamily as romantic types...

Dick: The hopeless romantic and flirt, shameless, makes it known who he likes.

Jason: The confused about emotions but still making an effort; getting flowers that he probably just snatched from a feild, buying chocolates and gets embarassed about any positive feedback.

Tim: Border on stalking until he finds out what they like to use that as a tactical advantage, as well as over-analyzies every scenario.

Damian: Very foreward and very formal with everything, probably escort them to his Dads private yacht for a dinner date under candles and stars, being very serious the entire time.

Bruce: Emotionally constipated but sincere.

Barbra: Drops hints, but a lot of them. At once. Sometimes scares people but no one can turn her down, it's Barbra. Does not take no for an answer.

Cassandra: Very shy around them and makes casual comments; "You look nice today." etc.

Duke: Charming and patient, always there for his romantic interest as a friend first and lover second.

inaccurate Batfam quotes #15

Jason: Whatever, accidents happen.

Jason, pointing at Damian: How do you think he got here?

Damian: I will definestrate you, Todd.

Inaccurate Batfam quotes #14

Batfam on a rollar coaster:

Dick: Screaming in joy

Jason: Screaming in fear

Tim: Bored af

Damian: Pouting but secretly enjoying it

Bruce: Sitting stiff, internally screaming

Alfred: Sipping tea somehow without spilling

inaccurate Batfam quotes #13

Jason, snickering: shhhh...

Tim, peacfully reading:...

Jason: sneaks up and shoots a gun at the ceiling

Tim: jumps off the couch THIS IS WHY DAD DOESEN'T FUCKING LOVE YOU!

inaccurate Batfam quotes #12

Damian: Give it back, Todd!

Jason, holding a batarang over his head: What are you gonna do? Stab me?

Damian: Pulls out throwing knife yes.

Jason: wait, what?

Damian: stabs him

Jason: You little B*tch!

Bruce: appears Hey, no swearing.

Jason: Demon just stabbed me!

Bruce: Damian, what did I tell you about stabbing your brothers?

Damian: sighs don't stab your brothers...

If I had a nickel for every time I drew Tim insisting that Jason is a good person I’d have two nickels. Which isn’t a lot but it’s sad that it’s happened twice.

anyways have some de-aged Tim angst

saw someone point out that Tim wasn’t immediately jumping to become Robin, and that he had gone to Dick multiple times before deciding that he himself had to step in. I don’t think Tim blames Dick but I do think there’s a tiny bit of resentment because he doesn’t fully understand why Dick couldn’t just come back to Gotham in order to help Bruce instead of a complete stranger doing it.

Damian Wayne, because I don’t draw him enough.

POV: Some rando hit your brother on patrol and you have five seconds to come up with an excuse as to why you reacted with extreme violence.

Once again this is very built into my head canons of their relationships. In Dick’s perspective the Jason he had and the one he has now are almost basically two separate people. Their personalities, habits, and mannerisms are almost completely different except for the few rare moments where Jason almost seems like his younger self. Don’t get it mixed up, Dick loves both Jasons. He just sometimes catches glimpses of the old one and feels guilty that he couldn’t protect him. Jason was the first brother he had and the first one he lost, and I think sometimes he gets caught up in what could have been.

Part 3!!! This is the finale part! As you can see Jason does feel a teeny tiny bit of guilt for what happened but he’ll probably never admit it out loud. Also I don’t think Tim’s hero worship for Jason ever truly went away, even after all the murder attempts.

Part 1

Part 2

Part 2!! I feel like every time I draw them they look different. It also doesn’t help that in the last part I forgot to add in Tim’s freckles but that’s okay we’ll just ignore that detail!

Welcome to Damian Wayne on Fear Toxin. He constantly claimed that he was the only blood son and that he was the rightful Wayne heir. So he got rid of his competition. anyways I made their heads balloons cause crusty dusty funky dunky chemical gas.

When you’re technically legally dead you don’t have to attend Galas. However that doesn’t stop you from making fun of your older brother, who is still required to go.

There really isn’t enough JJ content in the world, so I thought I’d contribute. I’m still working on being good at clothes (especially shoes) but I’m happy with how it turned out.

Another Jason Todd headshot cause I love him. Yes smoking is bad for your lungs, but you know what’s worse? Dying.

I think a lot about Jason missing his adolescence and the dismorphia he must feel waking up in a body twice his size all of a sudden.

But recently I've been thinking about the loss Bruce and Dick must feel for missing that portion of his life that they were likely looking forward to. To need to look up at their baby boy/brother all of a sudden when your last memory of him you could carry him on your hip. This man has a whole personality, memories, experiences they don't know about when just yesterday they knew everything about him.

The idea of Jason not having any scars after the Lazarus pit is also angst central usually. Jason shows up and says "I'm not the kid you knew". They look over him and the small burn on his wrist from when him and Dick tried to cook? Gone. The scar on his back from falling in training that led to him and Bruce taking a PT break together? Nowhere to be seen.

When they work together they slot into his right out of habit since he's had more of an opening there since he broke his arm but... That injury doesn't exist anymore so he moves out of that position. And they're left with that small reminder that he's grown now. He's still Jason but they don't know him like they used to anymore.

Ugh I love this every time I see it. Dick is looking at Red hood, at his brother alive and in front of him in the present, like he is all the light in the world(note the choice of lighting hitting that side of his face). Jason will never know though cause he won’t look back, he’s too focused on Robin and the red hood helmet, at what was and what has to be done. He does not dare look at what is at the moment because what if Dick is also looking at Robin, what if the brother he wanted back was not him any longer. So he will focus on the mission while Dick is left to despair over what could be.

"Do I look like him?"

Tim: what's the meanest thing you've ever done?

Jason: i know you expect me to say trying to beat you to death that one time, but in the league i once told Damian that Talia was lying about his heritage to manipulate Batman and his actual father was Lex Luthor. so that.

Tim: ?!

Jason: yeah i faked a DNA test to prove it and he believed me for like 4 months.

Tim: holy shit

Jason: to be honest the meanest part was probably putting hair removal cream in his shampoo and convincing him he was going bald due to genetics. he was nine.

Tim: you are my hero. hear me say these words. I. Love. You.

Jason: i know buddy. i know.

I read somewhere that its common in Arab culture to refer to someone close to you as your organs, implying you can’t live without them. Like how in english someone would say “my heart” (qalbi), in Arabic someone would also use “my liver” (kabidi) “my lungs” (riati). Notably, “my blood” is “Dami” which is funny bc it’s Damian’s shortened nickname.

Damian’s brothers have been using the nickname for years with or without knowing. I propose that as Damian gets closer to them, and Tim in particular, he responds in kind.

He starts to refer to Tim as “tuhali.”

…it means “my spleen.”

(Edit: this has now been confirmed by several Arabic speakers! Except the pronunciation of Dami (as in my blood) and Dami (shortened) are different which is sad. But my spleen idea works! So I’m happy!)

Jason: "Don't attack, it's me."

Dick, staring at the target through the scope: "Finally, what took you so long--" *turns and stares*

Jason, in Discowing suit: "Bike had problems. What?

Dick: "You know what."

Jason: "Come on, you don't like my Halloween costume? Literally had to fight Robin 3 for it."

Dick:

Jason, grinning: "Too soon?"

Dick: "Let's just get this over with, I can't even look at you right now."

Jason, muttering as he takes the scope from him: "Holy self-loathing Batman."

Dick: *shoves him off the roof*

I hate canon Bruce Wayne hitting his kids so how does he discipline them WITHOUT abuse?

(where's that post about how anything can be a punishment if you frame it as one)

———————

Dick: *breaks the chandelier while swinging from it*

Bruce: *hands him a broom*

Dick: Yeah that's fair.

Bruce: Also you have to use the Batman plate at dinner.

Dick: Please no, I hate that plate.

Bruce: You should've thought about that before.

———————

Tim: *logs into the Batcomputer without permission*

Bruce: And what do you think you're doing?

Tim: I know I've been benched but I just need to—

Bruce: Sit.

Tim: *sits down*

Bruce: *puts on The Bee Movie*

Bruce: If you insist on being down here while injured, then you're gonna watch this in its entirety.

———————

Cass: *blinks*

Bruce: And you think that's an excuse?

Cass: *blinks*

Bruce: We're going for a drive and I'm picking the music.

Cass: *blinks*

Bruce: Maybe you'll take this as a lesson.

———————

Jason: *causes a crime scene*

Jason: Go ahead, punish me. I'll still be right.

Bruce: *takes out a marker*

Bruce: *draws a mustache on Jason's helmet*

Bruce: It'll wash off in three weeks.

Jason: WHAT?!

Bruce: Actions have consequences.

———————

Steph: *breaks protocol*

Bruce: Go change your cape in the car.

Steph: That's not fair!

Bruce: That's the rule.

Steph: *grumbles and puts on a cape that's a slightly different shade of purple from the rest of her suit*

———————

Duke: *sneaks in after curfew*

Bruce: *flicks the light on*

Bruce: Do you know what time it is?

Duke: I can explain—

Bruce: Yogurt. Now.

Duke: But I don't want yogurt.

Bruce: I don't care. Go eat a cup of yogurt and think about what you did.

———————

Damian: *drops his fork at dinner*

Damian: Fuck.

Bruce: *pulls out a straw*

Damian: You wouldn't.

Bruce: *takes a sip of Damian's drink*

Damian: I hate this family.

Dick, eating off the Bat-plate: You and me both.

I might write something like this. Like Damian or Tim(depends on what timeline I decide) gets friendly with the kid from Crime Alley and creates a web of information for easier ways to make sure the kids are taken care of.

Okay but Bruce being Bruce Wayne and adopting a bunch of kids, like the elite looking to him and stuff and they want to appeal to him so he supports them and stuff. Stay in his social circle.

So they start adopting children and stuff. Some of them genuinely growing to love them and adopting children of Gotham. Others though, they hate it and the children, so after like 4 months they stop doing anything for the child or just go “I don't want it anymore, it's just…they aren't the right kid for us”

And when Bruce finds out he looses his shit on these people, he is making jabs at them with a strained smile with rage in his eyes. He is making sure those kids get good loving homes, he talks to others who are good and care.

Tim? He finds out these kids are getting neglected and he makes sure those kids get out of their house and then tanks their business, but don't worry, he hands out applications to those who work for them so they ain't struggling to find a job.

Jason seeing these kids were on the street getting homes and being fed and clothed and warming up to them, it warms his heart, yeah fuck these rich elitists but some of them are good. Then he sees the kids who get sent back, who don't get attention after a certain amount of time, he takes the kids and says screw you to rich persons. And works with Tim to take them down.

Damian understands being forced into the home of strangers and not belonging and having to conform to their ways, it doesn't feel good. He sees kids going into these rich homes and having to change themselves, he watches very carefully. And when the kids get sent back, get ignored, oh-ho there's an unimaginable anger he never imagined having. They deserve to be cared for, to be loved, you took them in, you don't get to abandon them.

And Dick, he’s certainly the most proactive. Yeah…he wears the blue suit, but he isn't just in blue, he's a detective. He also has a private investigator license, no matter how much is going on, he will see if you're fit to be a parent. If you don't take care of those kids he will have the evidence, yeah Red Robin will drop evidence on peoples desks but it means so much more with Dick.

I don't know, just thinking about Bruce’s effect on the elite of Gotham that isn't just Batman but just Bruce himself. And then his kids being his little ducks behind him in the change of Gotham.