There is more to Spring than just the Bee's Dreams of a Meadow. Sunshine warms the petals of forgotten roots. Wildflowers sway gently, the breeze whispers secrets old, Life Blooms, and Love Unfolds
A car just came by and illuminated her face for nothing more than a breathe but in that moment I saw her. In her a beauty that has never before been rivaled or matched. My heart paced faster and my eyes watered and all I wanted was to have my hand on her face.
On days like this I can see Autumn is nearing. I think about that Robert Frost poem, "So Dawn goes down to Day, Nothing Gold can Stay". The house will soon be warmer, the trees a little more brown, the leaves changing shades and colors, the sky always a bit more overcast, a sun more orange than yellow. Personally I think about Apple Slices, Cinnamon, Allspice and Plum Cake. And recently in this house, I have had the pleasure of hearing Owls. "Her early leaf's a flower; but only so an hour." He describes an entire season of our lives as Only so an Hour. A breath on a breeze compared to a lifetime's run. I think about Shelby Eatenton, and what she says to her Mother in Steel Magnolias. "I would rather have 30 minutes of "wonderful" than a lifetime of nothing special." Nothing Gold can stay, But I am so thankful I get to live in a world where I get to experience something as wonderful and special as an Autumn Day.
It was that new years eve of 2019 going into 2020 and I had bought a bottle of prosecco. It was a last minute sorta thing like a surprise for my then girlfriend and I to drink she didn't know about it, however, sparkling wine is supposed to be served cold, right, so I stuck it in the freezer. Alcohol takes a lot to freeze, I didn't think nothing of it. I was Bartender for years at that point hadn't had any mishaps. I still keep vodka in my freezer even now. Anyway eleven thirty rolls around and I'm like I'm gonna bust out the champagne. I go and open the bottle, yeah, because the bottom of it froze the pressure made it so that when I popped the cork, it violently exploded off. Shattering the neck of the bottle, and careening the cork into the ceiling light fixture and spilling this half frozen slurry of sparkling wine all over the kitchen floor and the cabinets above me. Erin came rushing into the kitchen and I had to have been standing there with some half stupid half surprised look, I guess. We both just laughed and laughed. She laughed until her stomach hurt. We cleaned up whatever mess I had made trying to be seasonal and romantic, we drank screwdrivers for the rest of the night. The following year of 2021 it was literally during that big ol snow storm we got. It started that same night as Valentines you remember? Morgan hadnt been someone's Valentine before. Not officially. Shed never gotten flowers or other gifts before for Valentines. So I was Morgans first, I also got her this big ol hunting knife because she was big into knives. Anyway it was like midnight o'clock, and she had just gotten home from the airport, like the actual airport she worked there as like an usher for handicap people. And she was tired dude she gotten home ate like a bunch of biscuits and gravy that had been sitting out all day, and she came over in her pajamas and was just this beautiful mess that I completely adored. I wrote this poem about the experience "It's an image. It was February, Winter. The moon had just rose full again. My anxious heart still beating, as she walked up the stairs, she didn't knock she just entered. The warm light from the side of my house cast sight on the Snow caught in her Raven Hair." And we sat on the couch the rest of the night and watched YouTube videos. It was probably like the best and the worst Valentines kisses I had ever gotten, day old biscuits and gravy breath and all. She sent me pictures of her with the knife and roses later that I had used as my phone background for line months. And a voice message of her going "Fuuuck Yoou". whenever I'm in a bad mood sometimes, it's like I can remember some of the worst things that I've done or someone else has and I can stew in it for hours or days, or in the worst case entire seasons of my life. But sometimes I get glimpses of stuff like that, and its just so Human to me, and it isnt as taxing to breathe after that.
My astigmatism sometimes might exaggerate her radiance with spears of light and halos. However my myopia only makes me nearsighted not shortsighted.
I wonder how many per mutations I am from my daydreams? Michael Faudet once wrote "I am hopelessly in love with a memory. An echo from another time, another place." I would modify this to "I am hopelessly in love with a memory I dont yet have". How many decisions, or indecisions, a moments wembling, a pause, a misplaced stutter, getting caught in traffic red when it should have been green. A vain attempt at times to scry into futures yet unseen. Has my own ambition tripped me up from my own success? Some other version of me is also on this couch right now, somewhere. and there is laughter his rooms. McAlpine would sing "Somewhere I lost all my senses, I wish I knew what the end is. Over and Over, I am watching it all Pass... I wish I knew what the end is" Dostoevsky would say, "I am not angry at him. I know his thoughts. His heart is better than his head." I am not angry at him; I knew what the end is
I might be able to help!
does anyone have pokemon scarlet and can touch trade (trade then trade back) koraidon for my miraidon… i have 4 pokemon left to finish the dex and i want to get it done today SO badly, my flatmate has scarlet but she’s not home and im literally itching to get it finished LMAO. i would really really super duper mega appreciate it
I believe we are apt to see the truth as lies. Lies sometimes are alluring, sweeter to the ear, or easier to believe. We trick even ourselves, justifying them and enabling them. Pain and Anger are the greatest among the liars. They hurt us, so we doubt the truth. We define our Identity by our Truths. I will share with you what I have thought, felt and learned. Love, the complete commitment to the well being and happiness of yourself, another person or people without any condition or modifier. Integrity, the practice of being uncompromised in one's values and actions. Kindness, it is a behavior defined by consideration and concern. It is gentle, and it is generous. We become the truths we believe in. We accept the lives or the lies we agree with. We can choose, more importantly You can choose these things. But do not do this partially, or reluctantly, you have to accept it wholly. It is a challenge and it takes time. I am still learning. But if you allow them to they will change you.
I wish to be like a cold winter’s day. Atmospheric frozen solid. An optimistic indifference. I want to be the tingling sensation in someone’s toes, fingers, and nose. I want to be the warmth on their back. The reason why they curl up in a blanket at night. The reason why they don’t want to leave it in the morning. The thing that their very breath catches on. I want to be like a cold winters day.