Jason: Why Do The Vampires Keep Trying To Kill Us?

Salim: I'm going to take a shower, you want to join me?

Jason: I keep a gun in the drawer under my bunk. If I ever say no to that question I want you to shoot me with it

Jason, watching Zain steal something: Man, what an idiot, where are his parents?

Jason:

Jason: Oh shit, I am the parent

SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE TEACHERS PEOPLE IN THE BACK

“you’re [insert age here] and should already know how to—“ very inappropriate way to start or end any conversation with a disabled person <3

Nick: You gotta live more in the moment! Today is a gift!

Jason: Is there a receipt?

Salim: it’s been a rough 24 hours, we could stand to do something stupid

Jason: I’m something stupid, do me

Jason: Let's play twenty questions

Salim: Sure, what's your favorite color?

Jason: Circle. Are you into guys?

the funny thing about this is that Jason is actually a war criminal

Salim: can't believe i'm the first ever bisexual war criminal ❤ love wins

Salim: Is this... normal for them?

Jason: Yeah, trust me, it's normal for everyone, hey Salim, do you wanna... get outta here?

Salim: And go where? Home? We just got here.

Jason: Right... wait did Merwin just come out-?

Merwin: Joey, I'm gonna pretend for a second that you're my wife and that we have children,

Salim: I raised a man with a softer heart than the world deserves.

Salim, raising his stake: fortunately for him, my mother cannot say the same

Jason: How do you know how to kiss? like who teaches you?

Salim: Well it’s actually a class, but sadly it’s full at the moment now.

Salim: Would you like private lessons?

Nick: Damn that was smooth.