MAKING LIFE BEAUTIFUL ༊*·˚

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In Too Deep w/ Satoru 18+ NSFW

(best friends to lovers)

You weren’t sure what made you put on the extra bit of lip gloss or the bikini that hugged your curves just right. You even did your hair. Subtle perfume. It wasn’t like this was a date. Just another hangout with Satoru—your best friend, your pain in the ass, the guy who once saw you eat half a pizza in your underwear and still dared to call you “pretty girl”.

The one who’d seen you at your worst—half-asleep with tangled hair and mismatched socks, drunk off two cocktails. The one who you had been through everything with. From the petty arguments about him carelessly hurting himself or that one time when your ex-boyfriend cheated on you and he held you all night as you sobbed into his chest.

So when you stepped through the glass doors to his backyard, and he turned around—lounging poolside like a model in a ridiculous pair of sunglasses and smugness dripping off his grin—why did your heart start hammering in your chest?

“Whoa.” His voice dropped low as he sat up. “You clean up nice.”

You rolled your eyes, heat prickling your skin in places that had nothing to do with the sun. “Oh please. You’re just not used to seeing me put in effort.”

Satoru smirked. “So you did try. Interesting.”

You snorted and dropped your bag, walking past him and feeling his gaze trail behind you like the sunlight on your skin. “Try not to drown in your own ego, ‘Toru.”

But he didn’t stop watching. Even as you slid into the pool, letting the water wash the nerves away, you felt his stare—and something in it had changed.

The water was blissfully cool against your heated skin as you slipped in. Satoru followed with a loud splash, flinging water at you like a kid. It was easy to fall back into the rhythm of your friendship: teasing splashes, random grabs, jokes, the occasional glances that lingered too long. He drifted closer, inch by inch, like the pull of gravity was just stronger between you in the water.

“I didn’t know you were so weak,” he teased as you lunged at him again.

You hooked your arms around his neck with a grin. “I’m conserving my energy, obviously.”

He grinned as he grabbed your waist and pulled you under for a second before bringing you back up, water cascading down both your faces.

Then he started moving toward the deep end—fast. You stiffened the moment you felt your toes lose touch with the bottom.

“Wait—wait, ‘Toru, I can’t—”

He stopped instantly, letting you cling to him, legs wrapping around his waist instinctively. One of his hands slid under your thigh to keep you steady, the other resting warm against your lower back.

“Relax, I’ve got you.” he said softly, eyes uncharacteristically gentle as you clung to him. “You okay?” he asked, softer now.

You nodded, but your voice came out small. “Yeah. Just forgot how deep it gets.”

“Lucky for you,” he said, standing with the water at chest level, “I’m annoyingly tall.”

You snorted, but your laughter faded. You were suddenly hyperaware of how close his body was, how your chest pressed against his, how his strong hands didn’t move an inch too far but definitely not far enough.

“You’re staring,” Satoru’s voice dropped a little, playful still—but something deeper laced beneath it.

“So are you.”

He didn’t answer. The silence stretched, warm and tense.

“I really wanna kiss you,” you broke the silence before you could stop yourself.

Satoru blinked slowly, and then—very deliberately—tilted his head and kissed you.

It wasn’t rushed—not at first. His lips moved over yours like he was memorizing you, like he couldn’t believe you were letting him. Your arms tightened around him, and he groaned softly into your mouth as the kiss deepened, hands sliding under your thighs to hold you tighter.

You didn’t know how long you stayed like that, half-floating and half-pressed to each other, but eventually, he pulled back just far enough to rest his forehead against yours.

“You’re gonna be the death of me,” he murmured.

“Then take us somewhere softer to die.”

His laugh was low, rough. Without another word, he started walking—still carrying you, cradled to his chest like you weighed nothing. You blinked, surprised. “You’re really—”

He smirked. “Yup.”

You barely registered the door opening behind his shoulder, the sunlit bedroom welcoming you in. Large windows gave a perfect view of the shimmering pool, your damp skin glistening in the filtered light as he laid you back on his bed, hovering over you with a hunger barely restrained.

Satoru looked down at you like he was seeing heaven.

“I’ve thought about this,” he admitted, voice low. “Too many damn times.”

Your fingers skimmed over his abs, trailing lower. “Then stop thinking.”

His mouth crashed into yours again—hotter now, needy. He tugged the ties of your bikini loose one by one, slow and deliberate, like he wanted to savor every second.

Your back arched as his lips traced a wet path down your neck, teeth grazing your collarbone. He kissed the swell of your breast before taking one nipple into his mouth, teasing it with his tongue until you whimpered beneath him.

“You sound so fucking pretty,” he whispered, switching sides.

His hand dipped beneath your bikini bottoms, fingers finding you soaked and aching. You gasped when he rubbed slow circles over your clit, teasing and light.

“Been wanting you like this for so long,” he murmured. “I can’t believe you’ve been right in front of me, looking at me like that, and I didn’t do anything.”

“Do something now,” you challenged.

He groaned, deep and raw, then sat up to slide your bottoms off completely. You watched as he shed his own swim trunks, his cock already hard, thick and so ready.

He stroked himself once, then leaned over you again, voice a rasp against your ear. “Tell me you want this.”

“I want it. Badly.” you breathed.

He groaned, dragging his cock along your folds before easing in—slow, smooth, thick enough to make your breath catch.

“Shit,” he whispered, burying his face in your neck. “You feel so good.”

And for a while, neither of you said anything—just the sound of skin, breathing, and the creak of the bed under the slow, deep rhythm of his hips.

It wasn’t rushed. It wasn’t messy. It was everything you didn’t know you’d needed.

And when you came—clinging to him, legs still wrapped tight like they had been in the pool—he was right there with you, eyes locked on yours, like he didn’t want to miss a second.

“That’s it, baby,” he murmured, kissing you again. “Hold onto me.”

You did. You held him like he was the only thing keeping you from sinking.

And maybe, in a way, he was.

Afterward, he collapsed beside you, dragging you onto his chest, both of you sticky and grinning like idiots.

You traced patterns over his ribs and muttered, “So, uh... still best friends?”

He laughed. “Best friends who do this? Hell yeah.”

You giggled. “You’re ridiculous.”

Gojo kissed your forehead, pulling the sheet over both of you.

“And yet... you keep coming back.”

love this!

You’re uncomfortable being by yourself, and it’s ruining your life.

We’re all human beings, and it’s in our nature to crave interaction. To yearn for hour-long talks and constant messages. And this is normal, it’s perfectly fine. We all experience it. 

Problem comes when it reaches a point where you can’t survive without it. When your social media becomes the centre of your life, and you can't stop checking/refreshing/posting in hopes of getting some more of that sweet, fresh interaction. When you can’t sit for 5 minutes without needing to talk to someone.

You’re uncomfortable with being by yourself. Don’t get it? Let me rephrase. You are not able to sit in your own mind and be content. You can’t be alone with your thoughts, and this trouble comes when all your thoughts are inherently negative. When all your thoughts are about how you look, all alone and pathetic. About your appearance or something embarrassing that made you feel bad.

“Aeryne— how do I combat that?”

Well…

Be okay with being boring. Be okay with your thoughts going to “what am I going to have for lunch” or “that movie I watched was really interesting, let’s think about a scene I liked” Be okay with your thoughts being absolutely mundane.

Start observing. I’m sure you’ve seen babies or little children. They give you that thousand yard stare sometimes, because they’re always observing. We live in a life of stimulation, that doesn’t need to be your phone or your social media. Look at the colour of that wall, guess how fast that car is going. Fill up your time with some good old observations.

Get used to the fact that being alone is okay. And that no one else’s thoughts should affect yours. If someone thinks sitting alone = pathetic, loner, disgusting, I think they’re in for a rude awakening that life isn’t a 2005 coming of age movie. 

Now that we’ve changed your mentality a little, let me talk about the beauty of being solitary. The way of being alone.

Being alone, and having “me” time is so wonderful. God- being able to think about myself, and only myself? Not worrying about how my replies sound to others? My tones in speech? Glorious. When you’re alone, you have no one else to appease or listen to. Only yourself, so listen.

Woah- did you realise that? You can actually hear your thoughts. In this world of action, my mind is detached from all that hustle and bustle. There’s no one else’s thoughts or words filling up my logical reasoning. Just my own. 

Treasure your time with yourself. Realise what I’ve told you, apply it and you’re going to be comfortable with being by yourself. Here’s a personal challenge, if you can:

—Turn off all your notifications for an hour.

—Observe your surroundings.

—Listen to the thoughts, appreciate them.

thank you for listening, sweet ones.

xoxo,

Saint Aeryne 

PAINSLUT TOJI, MAYBE???!!! 18+ NSFW

(edited, enjoy!)

You were lying in bed, reading a book, when Toji finally came home. The door creaked open and he stepped inside, sluggish and quiet.

“I’m back,” he grunted, not even glancing your way before heading straight into the bathroom.

You raised an eyebrow, eyes drifting to the closed door. He didn’t look hurt—just... drained. You waited, listening to the sound of the shower starting up, then the low sigh that followed.

When he finally came out, he was toweling off his hair, another towel hanging low on his hips. His muscles flexed with each swipe, water still dripping down his chest. You let your eyes linger for a second too long before smirking.

“How was your day, baby?” you asked, setting your book aside.

“Absolute shit,” he muttered, walking over and flopping down face-first onto the bed “That guy’s gonna kill me.”

You shifted to face him. “Who?”

“My new training partner.” His voice was muffled by the pillow.

You nudged his shoulder playfully. “Aren’t you supposed to be super strong? Don’t tell me you’re getting soft.”

“Gimme a break,” he grumbled, not even bothering to lift his head.

You smiled and shifted over to straddle his hips, hands starting to knead the tension in his back.

He let out a long, low groan. “Yeah, that’s good,” he mumbled.

You kept working on him, thumbs digging into the spots that felt the most tense, feeling the stress slowly melt out of him. He made little grunts and sighs, equal parts pain and relief.

“You enjoying this?” you asked, leaning forward a little, lips brushing his ear.

“Fuck yes,” he breathed. “Don’t stop.”

You shifted again, your weight pressing into his lower back.

“Where you goin’, baby?” he murmured, lifting his head a fraction.

“God forbid a girl gets tired,” you said, brushing your hair out of your face. “Flip over.”

He let out a low groan and rolled onto his back, eyes half-lidded, body spent. You straddled his hips, dragging your fingers down his chest slowly. He shivered under your touch, his hands moving lazily to your thighs.

You started rolling your hips against him, just a little. Just enough.

“Don’t start this,” he muttered, voice tight. “I’m serious—I’m beat.”

You tilted your head, feigning innocence. “What d’you mean?”

Toji met your gaze, jaw clenched, clearly fighting the urge to move. “You know what.”

“Too tired to fuck me?” you teased, leaning in to kiss his jaw.

“I wanna,” he admitted, “but my body’s not keeping up right now.”

“That’s fine,” you whispered, grabbing his wrists and pinning them above his head.

“You don’t have to do anything.”

Toji groaned, head pressing back into the pillow.

He was used to being in control, used to flipping you over and fucking you until you couldn’t breathe. So being under you like this—unable to do anything but feel—was killing him in the best way.

“You just can’t wait, huh?” he muttered, his breath catching as your hips rocked again, slow and deliberate.

“Do you not want this?” you asked, peppering soft kisses along his neck.

“You know I do,” he breathed, eyelids fluttering shut. “But you’re playing dirty.”

You grinned, sliding your hand down his stomach, undoing the towel. His cock sprang free, already thick and hard, twitching under your touch. You wrapped your fingers around it, stroking slowly from base to tip, teasing the sensitive underside with your thumb. Toji bit his lip hard, holding back the shiver that racked his body.

You kissed your way down his chest, trailing lower until your breath fanned over his tip. He sucked in a sharp breath, and you smiled against his skin before pressing a kiss to the base of his cock.

“God, this is embarrassing,” he muttered through clenched teeth.

You tried not to laugh. “You look pretty good from down here,” you said, licking a slow stripe up his shaft.

He twitched and flinched as the muscles in his thighs tensed beneath your palms.

Then you took him into your mouth—slow, steady, letting him stretch your lips, the tip brushing the back of your throat. His fingers tightly clenched the sheets, his breath stuttering as he groaned low in his chest.

“Mmf… shit,” he hissed.

You came up for air, swirling your tongue around the tip, stroking the rest with your hand. You moaned around him, your own arousal pulsing between your thighs. You let his cock fall from your mouth with a soft pop and climbed back on top, straddling him once again. He looked up at you, completely dazed.

You didn’t give him time to speak. You peeled off your nightgown, pulled your panties to the side, and slowly slid his cock through your folds, spreading your wetness along his length.

His eyes locked on your pussy as you teased him. He let out a tiny, almost pitiful whimper.

“You’re so wet for me, baby,” he muttered, voice wrecked.

“Yeah? You want me to ride you?” you asked, placing his tip at your entrance and rocking your hips.

“Fucking get it over with—oh my god—” he groaned as you sank down onto him.

His eyes rolled back, head dropping to the mattress. You never thought you’d hear Toji whine, but here he was—completely undone under you.

You started slow at first, savoring the stretch, but you couldn’t help it—you needed more. You leaned forward, planting your hands on his chest for leverage and began slamming your hips down. The headboard banged softly against the wall in time with your movements.

“Holy shit, baby, fuck,” Toji moaned, his hands flying to your ankles, gripping hard like he was grounding himself.

“You see what you do to me, huh?” you whispered, grabbing a fistful of his hair and tugging just enough to make him look.

He barely opened his eyes, but when he did—his gaze locked onto the sight of your pussy swallowing his cock—and he let out a broken sound.

“Uhuh… just like that—fuck.”

His moans turned desperate, and you could feel yourself getting close. You clenched around him, his cock twitching inside you.

Your legs were shaking, and you could feel how soaked you were, the wet sounds between you two getting louder with every bounce. Toji's head was thrown back, mouth open, eyes fluttering as he gripped your ankles like they were the only thing keeping him from completely losing it.

“Fuck, baby—you’re gonna make me come,” he rasped, voice hoarse.

You leaned forward, your hands flat on his chest, hair sticking to your neck. “Yeah? You gonna come already, big guy?” you teased, breath hitching as you ground down on him slow and deep.

He let out a choked laugh, cut short by a groan. “Keep talking shit—see what happens when I can move again.”

You smirked. “You’re threatening me? Cute.”

You rolled your hips with purpose now, chasing that high you could feel tightening in your gut. All it took was feeling his cock throb inside you. Your body trembled, your moans falling out unfiltered as you clenched around him, eyes squeezing shut.

Toji’s jaw clenched as he tried to hold on, but the heat of your orgasm, the feel of your slick walls gripping him—it was too much. Toji swore under his breath, his cock pulsed as he spilled deep inside you, hips jerking up helplessly with each twitch.

“Fuuuck—baby, fuck,” he groaned, his head thrown back.

You slumped forward, both of you panting like you just ran a marathon.

A few seconds passed before Toji muttered, “I can’t believe you fucking did that to me.”

You snorted, brushing your fingers through his sweaty hair. “You loved it.”

He grumbled something into your chest, arms lazily wrapping around your back.

“You’re not gonna move, are you?” you asked after a beat, still on top of him.

“Nope,” he said flatly. “This is my life now.”

You laughed softly, “You’re such a mess.”

“Yeah, whatever,” he murmured, already half asleep.

Already listened twice today

*It has arrived* EQUUS CABALLUS, our second Equus opus, is out everywhere. This record carries every ounce of < 3 we have. We’re beyond proud to finally let it gallop free. Come catch us live on tour this year where will be playing these songs for the first time

(My dog made sure to sneak into just about every photo last time at the studio. Hi, Hobs.) Thanks for the 🌊 of love we’re already receiving

https://open.spotify.com/album/7dJPDPUi94jA91VxG4vZb3?si=uvC0Wfw-S6W0mgtJrl7nqg

https://music.apple.com/ca/album/equus-caballus/1810920290

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