New

36 hours without food now, running 10k every day. Feels good. My body disappears. Disturbing things: sleep is not good and I am freezing all the time (here is still winter). BMI 20.4 now.

Ate an apple yesterday 😭. And feel I failed @n@ and my best friend.

why do they take away always all the good meeting points for us @na-people? Really annoying

Binging, the next step

I was binging yesterday, a social occasion where I had some pressure. Still ate ",only" 1500 cals the whole day. But simply - I did not like it at all. No emotions. I even did not gate it. Simply.. meaningless. It feels so good. Food and I am on two different planets

Crossed bmi 21 in the right direction today. Can't wait being under 20. I eat now three to four moderate meals a week. Happy.

Bad day today. I am stressed, there is an important exam in six days. And I was alone at home, the most dangerous situation. So I binged. After running says my calculator that I had an intake of 1000 cals. Still undercaloric, but I feel like a piece of shit

i love starving myself

nobody knows what i’m doing, i walk around with a secret, and i love it

Happy today. Making food for my family, but didn't eat anything. It was no fight, I simply was not tempted. After a binge Friday a relief

new rules just for me:

(im writing these here cause i hide tumblr on my phone so no one can find it)

1. no more than 500 cals a day

2. no liquid calories only water

3. vitamins and supplements every single day no exceptions

4. 10,000 steps a day

5. if youre eating a meal dont finish it

6. no snacking

7. home workouts every night before bed

🤍🤍🤍

Everybody wants something from me. The world is fucking up. I want only run away. I can't. But I can decline this fucking world by declining eating. This really helps. It's not 3d. It's liberation.