No Matter How Many Times My Favorite Person Tells Me He Loves Me I Don't Believe Him. I Can't Believe

Being near me is not a privilege, it’s a punishment

Quick sketch that I made (⁠~⁠‾⁠▿⁠‾⁠)⁠~

When did this start? When did I wake up hating myself? When did I start avoiding every mirror I came across? When did I hate being in pictures? When did my smiles become forced, and difficult? When did I stop looking both ways when I crossed the street? When did I stop leaving the house because I hated the way I looked that day? When did I grow to hate myself so much that I did physical damage to my body? When did I realize I had to change my wardrobe to hide the scars? When did I start avoiding everybody that ‘loves’ me? When did I start wanting to leave this world? It’s been so long, I don’t remember.

I’ll never be pretty enough

I’ll never be skinny enough

I’ll never be capable enough

I’ll never be funny enough

I’ll never be enough.

“absence makes the heart grow fonder”

absence makes me want to kms

Having bpd is literally the worst thing ever. A mood swing can hit you literally anytime any second of the day. You’re literally at the mercy of this fucking illness. Does it care that two seconds ago you were having an amazing time with your friends? No. Does it care that no will understand why you’re frowning and sitting in a corner when you were literally laughing two seconds ago? No. It doesn’t give a fuck about anything or anyone. Not one thing. It just consumes you. And makes you hate yourself for being like this because there’s nothing you can do about it. Nothing.

People really think I'm joking when I say my emotions get so intense that I believe the only way out is to kill myself.

Once I learn how to stop being me it’s over for y’all