Commission Sheet!!! If You Need More Info, Don’t Hesitate To Dm Me Umu

I want this game sooo badly now. You're evil

So I got a really stupid idea but it’s really complex so hear me out.

So I kinda wanna see a sequel to Arkham Knight where instead of playing Batman you switch between 4 children of Gotham Rogues, specifically Killer Croc’s daughter, Scarecrow’s daughter, Riddler’s daughter, and Joker’s son, and you play the whole game running from ARGUS and trying to defeat a mystery villain, all while trapped on the abandoned Arkham Island.  The whole time Riddler’s giving them all help because his daughter’s trapped and also because Scarecrow threatened to kill him if any harm came to his daughter.

And each kid has special skills, both in combat and out of combat, so you don’t get too complacent playing one specific kid.

Croc’s daughter can breathe underwater for extended periods of time, making her ideal to get through underwater sections of the game, and she’s really strong, making her ideal for getting rid of big obstacles and stuff.

Scarecrow’s daughter can breathe in segments with poison gas and is the agilest, making her the natural choice for segments with stealth or climbing crumbling structures.

Riddler’s daughter is good with tech and wears goggles with something similar to detective vision, making her a good pick for segments involving breaking into locked off areas and segments requiring locating objects that are hidden from view.

Joker’s son is the smallest of the group, making him the obvious choice for climbing through vents and small areas.  He also has a grappling hook (stolen from Batman in one of the previous games and given to him as a gift) so he can climb areas Scarecrow’s daughter can’t reach.

And as a DLC, there’s an updated version of the first 4 games where instead of playing as Batman, you’re using the switching mechanic as the kids, and there are updated voicelines where the rogues interact with their children and there are combat segments that are easier and harder depending on which kid you play as, not because of skillsets, but because the parents have different responses to fighting their own kids.

I dunno, it was an idea.

Late night

Ficlet of Jervis and Madeline

The rain made everything seem so loud. Every step, every panting breath, and every police siren echoed so much louder. A part of her wished all of the noise would just stop, stop and let her think. Instead, she kept running forward. Madeline could feel rather than see Tetch stumbling behind her, all she could do was grip his hand tighter and hope the next turn would give them a place to hide. 

Finally several abandoned buildings came into sight and Madeline forced her exhausted legs to push faster.

"Tetch, come on! Just a few more steps! Then the police won't get us. I promise, we'll be safe soon!"

Madeline turned her head only for a moment to see Jervis's panting exhausted face. If she was in a better scenario, she'd try to carry him, but that was impossible now. 

Finally buildings stood in front of them. Without thought Madeline grabbed her remaining Kama and broke the glass to the dingy window. She quickly grabbed Tetch and thrust him through before hopping in herself. The moment her body dropped inside she felt shards of glass entering her torn boot. 

For a few tense seconds, they both remained on the floor, panting. Mercifully, the sirens disappeared, leaving only the sound of rain. Still exhausted, Madeline pushed herself up and looked at her companion. He remained on the floor, trying to curl up and block out the world. 

"Alright, alright, Tetch, the cops are gone, we just need to lay -"

"March, why did- did she do that? Why did she scream for the Red Queen?"

Madeline's face softened as she realized that Tetch was once again lost in his own fantasy. Slowly, Madeline crept closer to her companion, ignoring the glass that penetrated part of her broken boot. Madeline half jumped towards Tetch, before tilting her chin up and wiggling her nose.

"Now now Mister Hatta' we know that wasn't the real Alice. Why that young girl just wanted - wanted to play a game with us. No need to sulk!"

As casually as she could, so as to not spook him, she pushed Tetch into her lap, dusting off the broken glass that stuck to him.

"Ah, but March! I don't care for croquet, you know! And I'm tired of all these silly games!" 

Tetch pouted, throwing his arms in the air, ignoring the bleeding wound on his arm.

"Alice, oh Alice, where is she? Can't she see how much I want to bring her a party?"

Madeline sighed, looking around the old building. She would need to find something to distract him from his pity party. 

"Well, sometimes girls just want to -"

Suddenly, Madeline had a marvelous idea. Moving her hand to grip his shoulder, she forced him up to see a pile of decrepit boxes.

"Ah, look Hatta', a tea party! Already set up! How wondrous, how stupendous! Perhaps this was all a game to get us here!"

Madeline glanced down at Tetch, hoping that he would see the table and cups, and not some other wicked thing. She could never fully predict where his mind would take him. 

Just as she thought, he immediately jumped up and began eagerly walking towards the pile.

"Well, Callooh Callay to you, March! For a hare your eyes are sharp, why I bet they could cut a rath in half!"

Without another word, he sat himself on one box lower than the rest, and began to mime pouring tea.

"Hurry, Hare! Before it gets too cold!"

Smiling, Madeline stood up, already feeling the soreness in her body. It was only a temporary distraction until Tetch got his bearings. 

'Why, see this! Our day went from mimsy to frabjous in an instant! Why it's like a -'

"Not the same thing a bit!’ said the Hatter. `You might just as well say that 'I see what I eat' is the same thing as 'I eat what I see'!"

"You might just as well say,’ added the March Hare, `that 'I like what I get' is the same thing as 'I get what I like'!"

The words tumbled out of Madeline’s mouth with ease. Madeline slowly sat down next to her friend and pretended to eat a crumpet. She knew they'd have to leave and find a better hide out. For now, playing pretend with her friend was all she wanted to do.

Her other self was fluffy and cute, but she doubted they would like to be to told that. They did however appear friendly and welcoming.

"Ah thank you! I full heartedly agree!"

Taking the offered seat she grabbed a cup and set about pouring herself some tea.

"We are just a set of twiddles with a single Hat between us."

Setting the tea pot in a clear area on crowded table she added, "Though one of us has a better coat I concede. Do you have any preferences in coats or teas Hatter?"

● { @themarchinghare} ●  | { Pour a new cup! }

✂ - - -   “ Wait–wait! Hold everything– SILENCE March! ”

March was not making any noise.   “ Do you hear that? Someone is walking in our garden… The roses are talking about them behind their back– as they do… ”

He pauses. “ …March Hare is coming? What? –Did I send you two invitations, March? If so this other you is terribly late indeed… Oh, March Hare! Over here you silly lagomorpha!  ”

Blackberry Cheesecake

Y'all may notice some strange things happening to this blog but don't worry I'm just doing some 'cleaning' up of this blog since it's my main!!!

Do you have sleep/dream/nightmare headcannons for Jervis?

Jervis sleep headcanons

- Goes to bed at 9:30pm, wakes up at 6:00am

- An insufferable morning person.

- wears Ebenezer Scrooge pajamas.

- Sleeps on his left side and has very soft snores.

- His dreams are mainly tea parties

- The guests and location varies but it’s always some sort of social event.

- Nightmares are where it get fucked up.

- He has a recurring nightmare where he’s in solitary confinement in Arkham and the walls close in and suffocate him.

- Another one where he’s trapped in a grey cubicle and tries to climb out but then his father fucking appears out of nowhere and drags him back down.

- Theres one where all his friends yell at him and kick him.

- And then there’s this weird one where he’s getting married but the ceremony never starts and he never sees who he’s marrying. It’s just a bunch of people waiting around and then he wakes up confused.

- He’s pretty sure the wedding one is his subconscious bemoaning the fact he’s single. 

- He’s not going to think about the actual nightmares.

Mad Hatter's quirks relating to the Lewis Carrol books

Traits directly from the book:

These are just a reference for me to look at for future Batman fanfiction and shitposts because I want to get them right, and perhaps for anyone who hasn’t read the book Alice in Wonderland. If Jervis is truly trying to mirror the Hatter to the letter, he should get all of these. 

If you want to see the traits alluded to instead, they’re under the cut. If you’re interested in some of my personal headcanons, they’re also just under the cut.

Anyways, here we go.

- According to illustrations, he’s small and wears a proper dress shirt, coat, and bowtie, along with a large hat with a card stuck in the top reading “In this style 10/6”

- The Hatter appears in chapter 7 and 11 of the book and not in Through the Looking Glass. He’s with the March Hare and the Dormouse, who can be percieved as his best friends.

- If you attempt to sit down uninvited at his table, he’ll shout “No room! No room!” even if there’s tons of room available.

- If you sit down without his invitation, he’ll be grumpy. Even though the Hare does this, Jervis can offer you wine even if there’s no wine at the table, calling you out for sitting without an invitation.

- He has an odd need to cut Alice’s hair. “Your hair wants cutting.”

- “Why is a raven like a writing desk?” This is the most common question he’ll ask people. Those who get it right will put him in good spirits with them.

- The answer to the riddle, by the way, is “I haven’t the slightest idea” or just saying you don’t know. There is no answer. Lewis Carroll never came up with an answer until a bunch of fans of his work wrote to him, so Jervis stays faithful to the book.

- He’ll easily confuse you if you contradict yourself. For example, when Alice says that “I mean what I say” is the same thing as “I say what I mean”, the Hatter replies with the notion that it’s like saying “I see what I eat” is the same as “I eat what I see”.

- He has a pocketwatch that tells the day, month, and year instead of the time. And it’s two days off.

- He can’t tell the time because he believes that it’s 6:00 all the time. This is because Time, who is described as a person, doesn’t like him, and thus stopped moving for him.

- 6:00 was British tea time back then, which explains his obsession with tea.

- He loves stories, and will demand one from others.

- He also sings. Yes, he sings. “Twinkle twinkle little bat, how I wonder what you’re at. Up above the world you fly, like a tea tray in the sky.” Luckily, that’s all.

- He’s also no stranger to rude remarks, even calling Alice stupid at one point.

- There’s a point where he tries to shove the oversized Dormouse into a teapot. I like this idea because I like imagining Jervis grabbing Riddler by the hair and slamming his head into a teapot.

- He collects hats to sell them, so he has a large variety.

- He has a large fear of the King and Queen of Hearts. In fact he gets extremely anxious in these situations when under a lot of pressure and fumbles when he speaks to the point where he even fucks up a few of his movements, biting a piece out of a teacup instead of his bread.

Jervis’ possible quirks according to the books:

These aren’t particularly attributed to the Mad Hatter, but can be used as references that are good to know. Most of these are about Alice or Wonderland in general.

- Alice prefers picture books, so, being in a place of imagination, it would make sense the Mad Hatter would like them more. However, being a genius, he will read regular books if he really must. He just finds them boring.

- Despite speaking more than proper English, there are some made up words sometimes from the book that Alice or the characters use, like the infamous phrase “Curiouser and curiouser,” which was a word made up and coined by Lewis Carroll. Though, it’s not considered a legit word. Examples also incluse “pleasanter”, Expect Jervis to use a few of those.

- The metaphors are very odd and almost always come from the books, and are hard to understand. For example, “shutting up like a telescope” means to get smaller.

- At one point, Alice gets confused about who she is, believing herself to be another little girl instead of Alice. It would make sense for the Mad Hatter to call other people he believes to be “Alice” by that name, believing they’re just confused over who they are.

- He’ll sometimes speak to animals as if they’re people. Does he expect them to answer? Maybe.

- Alice is actually learning French. It would make sense for Jervis to deliberately learn French for this purpose. He just might be bilingual.

- Alice carries around a box of comfits and enjoys marmalade. Jervis might be more favorable to sweets.

- Most of the denizens of Wonderland are animals, so it can be gussed that Jervis would have a love of them.

- “We’re all mad here,” says the Cheshire Cat. Jervis could very well know he’s nuts and just rolls with it. Hell, he might even desire it, possibly refusing psychoactive treatment.

Personal headcanons:

- It’s already been established he’s short as fuck, but hey.

- Jervis names every supervillian and hero in Gotham after a character in the book. For example, Jonathan is the March Hare, Batman is the Jabberwocky, Joker is the Queen of Hearts and Harley is the king, things like that.

- He has very proper English and uses complex vocabulary, as well as made up words from the book. The only ones who can really understand him completely are Scarecrow, Riddler, and Batman, who have read the books front to back to understand him.

- He has a copy of Alice’s Adventures with him at all times. He’ll hand it to someone if they can’t understand what he’s talking about. Scarecrow dubs it “Jervis’ dictionary”.

- To calm himself down from a particularly harsh schizophrenic episode, he hums some of the rhymes from the books.

- The rhymes and phrases he mutters to himself when it gets quiet also dictate what mood he’s in. Usually he’s pretty cheerful, but the poems get darker as the more disgruntled or sadistic he feels.

- He’s prone to suddenly stopping himself in random conversations and quiet situations to squeal that he’s late or something like that. He’ll continue to freak out for a good thirty seconds before calming down and continuing to talk like nothing happened.

- No one actually knows what he’s late for, but reminding him of it is a good way to stop him in his tracks for a good few seconds. The only time this doesn’t work is with a serious event going on or if he’s upset.

- His most prized possessions are his hat and his copy of Alice in Wonderland, but in case those are every destroyed, he has, like, twenty other duplicates at home.

-He is bilingual in both French and English.

- He’ll take a hammer to any copy of the Burton movies he comes across.

Natural Study Art Prints by RivuletPaperShop

x / x / x / x

I absolutely enjoyed this little writing with Madeline and Shaw!

Ethereal: (adj.) extremely delicate and light in a way that seems too perfect for this world I'm curious to see what you'd do with Madeline and Shaw for this, thank you!

(Note to readers: The Madeline here isn’t Madelyne Pryor, it’s @themarchinghare‘s OC Madeline Daresbury akak The March Hare, who is also a baker!) “I’ve read that adults begin loosing their sense of taste between forty and fifty,” said Shaw, “It starts with the nuances, the subtleties, the underlying flavors dominated by the rest of the dish ...and by one’s sixties, one may begin to be unable to distinguish between the basic groups of sour, bitter, and sweet.” He ran one broad fingertip---even this smallest part of him was broad---over the crystalline structure that Madeline had concocted. “I stopped liking sweets before I started being able to afford them. Perhaps that’s why. I would have longed for this as a boy. Now, though?” He withdrew his hand from the ethereal creation of spun sugar that the baker had delivered on his order for tonight, “Now it’s just about how it looks. Which is spectacular. You’ll have your payment wired momentarily.”