Hey, ladies, gents and in-betweens. I'm writing this because I've seen a really big up-tick in people in fandom (both readers and writers) acting in ways that are generally unsavory, and wanted to share the advice that I think is relatively common sense to not be a dickwad!
This will mostly focus on how to behave. If someone wants a version with writing tips, I would be happy to provide, but I also recommend you ask someone smarter than me (I know my limits lmao)
This will be divided into two sections: Readers and writers (obviously), but I'm going to start with....
• First things first, be nice. I cannot stress this enough, be nice. Not just to your authors, but to each other. No author wants to come to their comments and see a catfight.
• If you do have advice or criticism, make sure it is constructive! If you need to run your phrasing by someone else or use tone tags, absolutely do! Remember, when people feel hurt by something you said, they're not likely to listen to you very well.
• Now, this is where my rules get much less popular. Be mindful of the person writing your fic. Writing, like any other creative process, can be very draining, and writers have lives outside of their work, too! If you see a lull in output, don't comment on it. It's a bummer, yeah, I get it, but keep those feelings to yourself or complain to a friend. Don't harass a writer. You don't know what they're going through on the other side of that screen.
• Another thing I don't think I should have to say (mostly because tagging is a really popular thing), but you should probably make sure you're in a relatively good state of mind when you read. If it's hurt/no comfort, make sure you can handle that. No writer wants to know their work really fucked up someone else's day.
• I will say my single hottest take. You can be rude if you see fucked-up shit entirely untagged (think: extreme, not-canon-typical violence or abuse, + other subjects that can very much trigger a good deal of people). Things that come with real trauma. Leave a firm comment, but, again, be respectful.
• Yes, you as a reader are responsible for what you read, but there is a clear boundary of disrespect for both the platform and everyone on it when an author purposely leaves a very traumatizing thing untagged when they are very much aware of it. TLDR: Don't be a dickwad! Be nice and Support other readers and writers, but point out shitty behavior if you see it. Remember, any writer worth their salt wants to be accountable for what they put to paper. Be nice, but hold people accountable for their decisions.
• I feel like I have less to say here, but that does not mean I won't say anything.
• Right off the bat, take care of yourself. Your work will directly suffer if you are suffering. If you're too sick to write, then don't. It's as simple as that. This is not your job, you get no (or not much) money from it. You are under no obligation to get your next chapter out right this very second. Yes, even if you said it would be out by Thursday, I don't care.
• My real thesis with that is to give your writing time to breathe. Of course, how much you write and when will vary based on who you are and what the other facets of your life are like, but this is fan-fiction. Don't stress yourself into your casket over it.
• Now, I know I said a lot to the readers, but I do have a qualm with some of y'all, too.
• Respect the source material. Yeah, sure, it's fiction. Yeah, sure, you can do whatever you want. But I can tell you upfront that your fic will suffer if you don't care about the characters in it.
• Do a character study. Look at their reactions. Read into the why. Know them so well you could fully predict how they would react to at least four conversations off the top of your head. Yes, even if they're written to be mysterious. Know them anyway.
• Now, here is where I'm going to get a little heated. So, I'm going to be upfront. In this part, I'm going to talk about tagging your fics, and why it's so important to do so. Cancer is discussed, for the sake of my example and also because I am still pissed about the incident I reference.
• Remember that your work is public. Other people can and will see it. You can put who you prefer see your work in your bio if you want, but that doesn't mean that your readers will care.
• I say this specifically for the people who will post a fic to, say, Tumblr, where minors are, and then complain about a minor reading their work. Tell them you don't want them there, but beyond that, there is nothing more you can do. Drill that into your head. If someone wants to read your public work, they will. That's just what happens when you post your work publicly.
• Now, I'm gonna head into some more heavy shit. If you don't wanna hear a mention of cancer, scroll down to the asterisks.
• Let me paint a picture for you real quick. I find a sick-fic. Its tags are simple, nothing too extreme, and so I think it'll be nice and fluffy, a sweet thing to read before bed.
• I am sorely mistaken, as the writer proceeds to give their main character entirely untagged cancer, and then kill them. Again, with no warning for either from the tags! (and the fic was misleadingly well-tagged otherwise)
• I am a cancer survivor. I lost some of my first friends in that ward and I almost died there myself. Do you know how fucking stupid it is to leave something so big untagged??? Where anybody could stumble on it?
• Someone who just lost a family member to cancer could have read that fic. Someone much less mentally stable could have read that fic, that writer could have dug up hurtful memories at a time when someone wasn't ready to think those things. And they gave no warning.
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• This is what I ask of a writer. I don't think it's a very tall ask: Respect your readers. All of them. Respect everyone who might come across your page, by warning them what they're getting into.
• Especially if you're dealing with something that causes a lot of trauma. If your fic features domestic violence, an eating disorder, anything of that tune, tag it. I cannot say this enough, tag it.
• Yeah, sure, you technically don't need to tag everything (and some little things can very much be excused for me, personally), but I will tell you to your fucking face that I think you're a sack of shit for leaving major, traumatic things untagged. Respect your readers, they're taking time out of their days to spend it with you and your work. If you write things that might trigger trauma, tell them.
• I'm not saying you can't write about a heavy topic. In fact, seeing a heavy topic handled well in fic makes me happy! It means people's struggles are being given a realistic voice, no matter how small.
• I'm telling you that if you really cared about the struggles you're writing about, you would know some people aren't ready to confront them like that. So tell your readers what you're doing. Be transparent with them.
TLDR: Take good care of yourself. Your work is never to be placed before your health, physical or mental. Tag what might be triggering. Even if you don't think it necessary. Tag it anyway.
That's all I really have to say for now, but if you have something to add, please leave a comment! I would be more than happy to elaborate or hear people out on their own takes or further justify my own.
Have a nice day, writers and readers! Much love to all of you :)
Synopsis: A mission's end is always an odd thing to live through, but you've found ways to manage, WARNINGS!: depiction of injury, pain, description of gun sounds and bullets. Canon-typical violence (mission) Little notes: Hurt my thumb (big typing finger for me) so if there are any errors with spelling, please don't mind This blog is still very much new to me, so if you have any little silly comments or requests for bonus stuff, send an ask! It'll make my day :) enjoy! (but only if you wanna)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- There was dust in the air, swirling like a typhoon that simply ached to consume you and all you held dear. It doesn't throw anyone off, though, you've all been trained better than that. Price's voice is in your ear again, biting out the order to "get out of there, you dolt, bomb's off in thirty seconds." It's nothing you've never heard before, you know you've cut it closer and got out fine, so you wait until you have to reload to push the button on your radio and bite back a response. "Give me ten, Cap, and I'll be clear. Stragglers." You can hear him growl under his breath, but quiet. Some part of you would smirk in satisfaction, tease the old man over knowing damn well you could pull your weight, but there isn't time for that now. You're on the clock, and it ticks much too fast The familiar, satisfying click soothes any remaining thought as you slam the gun's magazine into your thigh to push it in the rest of the way, peek out from behind your cover to unleash another spray of shots into the idiot who was trying to creep up on you. Fifteen seconds
If your ear serves you right, only one left. if you take him out in five, that leaves you ten to get out. Risky, but the odds aren't zero. Your radio buzzes back to life, but now it's the other John yapping at you, something something "Get out of there." and then your name. Johnny doesn't use your callsign, but your name. It pulls you back from the edge of bloodlust just long enough for your mental count to hit ten. "Right. Clearing out." That's all you bother with before setting on your mad dash for the exit of the decrepit concrete rectangle that is this building. West's compromised, too piled with bodies to be a safe bet for running, and East is blocked. So you run North, through unfamiliar, winding hallways, for your life. Six seconds
The thumps of your boots aren't alone. You were right, though, there's only one more soul in this nasty shit-hole. Five seconds You hear a magazine getting knocked into place, cuss to yourself and push even harder, try your damnedest to get out of this unscathed. It isn't looking good now. Four seconds A bullet tears through the wall right next to your head when you turn the corner with a resounding crack. Fuck. The thrum of adrenaline is the only thing that supports you as you continue the mad dash for the door, see it at the end of a long, straight hallway. Three seconds This is getting worse by the second, and you know it. This fucker has good aim, there's no space to zigzag or dash in a random direction like a flighty, scared animal. Two seconds Time to run the gauntlet. Glass crunches beneath the soles of worn boots, you fly through the hallway as fast as your legs will allow, silently screaming a prayer to a god you know never listens. One second
Right as you cross the doorway, there's another crack of a bullet, but it's drowned out by the bomb finally going off. The shockwave is so intense that it launches you into the air (it feels much higher than it is), and, all at once, you turn to get a look of who almost managed to put you in a box. They're all dolled up in tac gear, but you know the look in their eyes the second you spot it. It's the same determination that drives you forward, raw and feral and it's tinged by the rush of adrenaline you live for. Young, too, they couldn't be older than you were when you first joined the task force. Then, when the ceiling above them cracks and stars to come down, it's fear. Your memories of the minutes after are loose at best, but you try to piece them together. You know that, at some point, you rose to your feet, made the jog back to the evac point with that rookie's blood sprayed on the vest that caught their last bullet. It would have hit you right between the ribs. You know that Kyle wordlessly sets a cigarette between your parted lips, pulls you in by the neck to light it with his own, hazel eyes focused as he calms himself back down. You know that he's there, next to you, like always, it warms you, if only slightly. Kyle doesn't press, doesn't try to talk, but he makes a point to show you that he's there. You know that Johnny breathes out a plume of that weird vape shit he's been swearing by (it smells like a public restroom if it was mint flavored), makes a bad joke about "butt fucking" because that's what they call bumming a light in Scotland. You think his friends just picked it up from shitty American movies and lied to him. You know that, when you finally take a drag, the nicotine shocks your systems back into full function. You know that when you open your eyes again, the world is clear. You see Price trot forward and let out a breath of both annoyance and pride. He used to tear you a new one every time you pulled a stunt like this, but now he knows better, knows you operate at your best in the split second between like and death. So now, you feel his hand pat the shoulder of your vest, resigned but proud. You feel your cheeks round with a small smile when you finally pull the cig back from between you lips, finally yourself again. "Not bad, ain't it? All targets neutralized." Your voice is just a little raspier than normal, tinged with the fading of your adrenaline high. From the corner of your eye, you see Ghost, leaning on the helicopter's side. He nods. "Aye, that was feckin' pretty, ye stupid lil cunt!" Your snort seems to make Johnny beam even wider than before, you feel the warmth of his side as he pulls you into a firm, one-armed hug. Out of sheer habit, you retch jokingly, and shove him back. "Gross! You're fucking sweaty, Soap, don't muck up my good shirt!" Your 'good shirt' is torn at the bottom hem, has a fine spray of blood on it, and is half-covered in concrete dust from the former building that is now a pile of smoking rubble a few hundred meters away. It'll all come off in the wash, just like today's sins will spiral into the drain of a weird-smelling communal shower room. And you know, come tomorrow, you'll be training with your boys once more, trading quips and barbs and soaking in camaraderie. For now, that's more than enough.
Warnings!: Nothing, other than a reference to Simon's dad. Just silly fluff to tide my sillies (you guys) over until the new chapters of the big boy fic(s) are done :)
Also: Price isn't included in this because I wrote a fic where he's an absolute asshole and accidentally made myself dislike him. Might add him later, idk.
Simon Riley is not nearly the stern man everyone thinks he is when he's at home.
It's kind of funny, really, but he's quiet, and he is stupid in love (assuming he already trusts you as a partner, which, if he's dating you, he does). Something like a cat, really.
He wants to be in your vicinity, always. He wants to know you're safe and okay at every hour he can, but sometimes he can't handle all that lovey shit.
This is why I do think Simon would spring for someone who is very quiet, and not very touchy. He adores that, he really does. It would be even better if you didn't mind having a big, bulky man staring at you while you work for hours on end.
It's to the point that, when the rest of the task force comes over, they aren't sure if you're a roommate or a spouse(?) until they see Simon gently bump his forehead with yours, watch how he follows you the same way a prissy longhair will trail after its nonchalant owner.
Price pulls you over that night and tells you that you have his full permission to marry the lieutenant. Simon hears him, but he doesn't say anything.
Another thing: He wants desperately to take your last name. It doesn't matter if it's stupid, he wants it so badly.
He's a bastard even with a father who was a bastard. His name links him back to corpses and an abuser, he wants to be rid of it. He won't ask, but if you do, he cries.
You've seen Simon cry before. You have. Mostly after nightmares, the especially bad ones. This is nothing like that.
He cries of joy before you twice. The first is when you let him take your last name, and the second is on your "wedding" day.
There is no ceremony, just a short trip to the courthouse. He cries anyway, watching you sign the papers, pulls you into a firm hug as he sniffles into your shoulder, tells you how much he fucking adores you.
He won't let you forget that. Ever.
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Johnny MacTavish is a harder task.
He's always one very predictable sort of way in his relationships: Playful. Loving and witty, always ready to tease.
Sure, there are days he's tired, days he's beat to the bone and he just wants to collapse and let moss grow over him, but he sees you and he gets a shot of something divine.
It doesn't matter who you are, really. Sometimes he needs you to match the energy a little, but other than that, he could get on well with any partner, as long as love is reciprocal.
Weddings, though... it depends.
This is where most of my more personal headcanons come into play here. I really think Soap's family is very Catholic. And that Soap is very bisexual.
If his family doesn't know (assuming the relationship is straight, too), it's great! It's a packed venue, sure, but it's raucous in the loving, familial way.
Soap wears his best kilt, cries a little as you walk down the aisle and kisses you so long his mother smacks him over it.
If not (he got kicked out, presumably years before)... it's much less fun.
He still adores you, truly, but, again, it's a bit solemn for him. Seeing you, perfect you, ready to marry a man who has no family left who wants him, it's a nasty feeling.
Johnny sees you the way he thinks everyone should. You're a person, yes, but of practically biblical levels of perfection, in his eyes. You've put up with so much, done so much, and you want him.
He won't ever get to show you to his mother, or his sisters, or his cousins, but he wants to. God, does he want to. He just knows they would have adored you, as they should.
But he can't. And it bums him out, it really does.
Still, he takes your face into his hands, and kisses you like the sinner he is, pours himself into your silhouette like he could somehow peel your ribs apart and find a space near your heart, to sit and love you for as long as he can.
No one is there to smack him for taking too long, and you hold him. And that's enough.
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Kyle Garrick is honestly the least challenging to end up in the good graces of.
He wants, more than anything, a peer. Someone who he can talk shit with and feel good confiding in.
So, of course he fell into a relationship with you. How could he not? Look at you. Brilliant, he'll say that. Brilliant, and an absolute menace with the silveriest tongue he's ever seen.
Again, like most, he's not really crazy about getting married. Not while he has a job so risky and at his age. It's more of an eventually, he feels no pressure to lock you down so fast, he already knows he has you, and that's enough for him.
This is most of the reason why the engagement is so long. I'm talking several years. Yes, multiple years. Moved in together, got a pet or two, even the rings.
And it's great, everything he could ask for. He comes home to a brilliant partner every day he's got the time, and he always wants to see you, because you're you. You can discuss, you can debate, and you can pull him over and tell him when he's being stupid.
The partnership works. And it keeps working.
At some point, you two were effectively married in everything but law, so you just forgot about the "wedding" bullshit and got one of his aunts to officiate in the living room and had a party that night with family.
Like any good soldier, Kyle has many issues with stress when he's home. His ultimate solution is to cuddle you whenever you won't be annoyed with it. Sometimes you talk, sometimes it's quiet, he doesn't mind.
He just wants you. Always.
And he knows he always will.
Never reblogged something before, but this shit is low-key weird. If you like my ramblings and want to follow, feel free to do so! Feel free to send asks and all your stuff!! I don't know what would compel someone to be so rude to strangers online. Follow and reblog, it's Tumblr, of course do those things.
So I just saw a post by a random personal blog that said “don’t follow me if we never even had a conversation before” and?????? Not to be rude but literally what the fuck??????????
I’ve had people (non-pornbots) try to strike conversation out of nowhere in my DMs recently, and now I’m wondering if they were doing that because they wanted to follow me and thought they needed to interact first. I feel compelled to say, just in case, that it’s totally okay to follow this blog (or my side blog, for that matter) even if we’ve never talked before.
Also, I’m legit confused. Is this how follow culture works right now? It was worded like it’s common sense but is that really a thing?
Part two :)
Warnings!: Angst, angst, and more angst. Reader will be MAD sad for most of this. Poorly-practiced, unhealthy polyamory. Reader will experience a LOT of gender and body dysphoria over the course of this (though I will do my best to keep it gender-neutral throughout, bear with me), but there WILL be comfort over that.
You spent most of the night following the surgery in a light doze, after a certain man named Gary walks you to your room, only slightly entertaining your efforts to walk upright on your own two legs.
Of course, he can't stay, he's got things to do, and he's not your fucking nurse, but he still makes you unlock your phone and watches you set the timer so you take your antibiotics first thing in the morning.
He still leaves to fill up his own water bottle, and sets it by your tiny, shitty nightstand, and he still brings the thing to your lips to make you take a couple sips, even as you try not to drift off right then and there.
When you look up with tired eyes, he offers a small, sympathetic smile, and leans down to gently bump your forehead with his own.
It's... an oddly endearing gesture, considering that's a grown-ass man, but your delirious smile seems to inspire more of that gentle treatment, because when his hands are free again, he's finger-spelling to you once more.
I googled some stuff for the recovery. Should I send you the links to the articles?
You melt, just a little bit, but nod, tiredly resting your heavy head on the pillow beneath it, just really soaking in not feeling like you're dying. Feels great, you've gotta say.
"Yeah. That'd be real sweet of you, luvie. Thanks for all the help."
He beams at you. You hate to admit it, but you smile, too.
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The day after is slow for you. Seeing as you're one organ down, it feels perfectly fit to work quietly in your own small office space, finding more information for prospective ops down the line.
It's comfortably-paced, much unlike how you'd been before your mistake. Back then, you were frantic, under a deadline you knew wasn't realistic trying to find documents that didn't ever exist.
Your job feels so much better without Price and the team on your ass. They never understand how discovery works, they think it just happens in a way that's frankly, stupid.
And, you're no liar, you'll say that getting periodic texts from your new friend really does brighten your mood.
Roach was a riot. And you forgot how it felt to be with that energy, the spark of new meat that you had felt yourself losing in the team.
He's a good lad, might have to get him a dinner, as-
Your train of thought is (rudely) interrupted by your door opening, without a knock or anything, and an irritated Johnny standing behind it.
"Mind tellin' me why ye werenae runnin' feckin' drills today? Ye said ye'd fuckin' spot me."
You're not surprised that his voice is supremely annoying to you right now. Normally, that Scottish slang is a comforting noise, a reminder of the company you hold, and how they've always had your back.
This time, you kind of want to knock him in the jaw for it.
This anger, it will pass.
Maybe.
"If you've got an issue, go to Price. It's not my job to fill you in on every little detail of my life, and I have a job other than training that I need to be up-to-date with."
The metal of Gary's water bottle makes a quiet noise on the textured plastic of your desk as you raise it to take another sip, effectively silencing Johnny for just a second as you hear him sputter to himself.
"Th' fuck are you- you're not drinking coffee."
Of course that's the thing he notices. He can't notice when you're on death's door begging for help, but he knows how you take a morning beverage.
You really wanna punch him now.
"Detox."
You answer is terse, not quite like you, and he furrows his brows.
"Ye're hidin' somethin', ain't ye? S' it 'cause of the mission? 'Cause that was a stupid call, an' you can't fix stupid."
What a way to make amends, Soap, show up at my door and insult me after a brief interrogation. Charming.
"My god, would it kill you to shut your mouth just once? Is that too big an ask, now?"
Harsh. That was harsh. You know it was, and that it was a mistake, but when you open your mouth to apologize, Johnny beats you to it.
"Fuck you."
The slam of the door makes you cringe, and look back down to your documents, the little notes you've drawn in the margins and the highlighter that's smudged the pen just a little bit.
Before you dwell too long, there's a quiet ping.
A small, stupid looping video pops up when you open the offending chat.
It's a poorly-rendered cockroach, spinning is stupidly whimsical circles and turning colors as a song you don't care to name plays in the background. The text under it is what makes you soften.
medicine checkk in!!! take the medcine if you havent :)
His spelling is amateurish at best.
You're really fucking screwed, with that one, and you know it, but still, you set the phone down, and open a new tab.
British Sign Language basics. You could do that.
Part One | Previous | Next
Part Four <3 This is where shit will get GNARLY, lovelies, so mind the gap (between Reader and their three awful boyfriends [not counting Gary, obv])
Warnings!: Angst, angst, and more angst. Reader will be MAD sad for most of this. Poorly-practiced, unhealthy polyamory. Reader will experience a LOT of gender and body dysphoria over the course of this (though I will do my best to keep it gender-neutral throughout, bear with me), but there WILL be comfort over that.
You're comfortable there, in that bathroom.
Gary, even after he's wiped you down, treats you gentle. Sits you up in your own little corner and has you sip on some water as he showers in one of the stalls.
It felt nice, just letting yourself cool back off, but not really being on your own.
Gary was very kind with you.
Should bring him food, some part of your lizard brain supplies, he looked like he was struggling a little his last set.
With the new mission in mind (and a spare* hoodie that Gary keeps in his gym bag), you knock on the shower wall to alert him that you're leaving, and shove your phone from your own bag into your pocket without even taking a glance at it.
The calmer, almost content feeling abandons you as soon as you open the door and spot Gaz walking into the gym room.
Of course, his hazel eyes catch onto you, and of course (because you really can't catch a fucking break), he trots over.
He doesn't greet you as he typically does, not with a sweet endearment and a firm hug. Instead, you're met with an appraising, almost judgy glance–knowing Gaz, he probably is judging you–and a cocked brow.
"Didn't pick up your phone before you showered?"
The question rings out to you, but you know he's not all that in your answer. It's not a warning, but a reminder that Gaz has never been the most patient. He's never liked to wait.
"Haven't checked it in a couple days, actually."
You impart in kind, crossing your arms over your chest for your own sake. You really don't want to have any face-downs today. You'd been feeling so good before.
He looks you up and down once more. It feels like his eyes peel your skin back, taking in the appearance of the ugly, squishy bits inside you before he clicks his tongue and steps back a bit.
"Right then. Just so you know, Johnny's right miffed with you. Told me you were being a prick last night. You know why?"
You hate this. You hate this so much. You would have never signed up for this if you knew It would be so draining.
Soap who couldn't keep it in his pants long enough to treat you like a partner, Gaz who seemed to want to cut your head off every time tension arose, and Ghost. The romantic equivalent of an absent father you only see on Christmas or birthdays.
Maybe you're letting the anxiety of the last few days talk. Maybe it's rash (no, it's definitely rash), but you can't handle a second more of this.
"Yeah, I was, sorry." You pause, before just coming out with the rest of it: "I'm thinking about cutting off this... thing. Thought you should know."
Ooh. Spoken with tact. Good job. Your own thoughts mock, but the very worst part of this is that Gaz seems to finally snap out of whatever haze he was caught in. His face twists, and your stomach twists with it as you watch his brows pinch and hear his voice quiet.
"...What? Love, you can't-"
You've pushed him to the back foot now, and it feels horrendous. So, you try to harness the grossness you always feel when he touches you, the aching emptiness of your room when you hear Soap on top of Gaz.
Or the knowledge that Soap and Ghost stay with him longer than they ever have you.
You were too green, too new to the team and too stupid to remember that of course the others wouldn't offer too much. But something between waking up from emergency surgery alone and making friends with the guy who dragged you away from death's door made you open your eyes to it.
"It's fine. Not your fault, just my mistake."
"Mistake, what do you even mean mistake? We were supposed to be partners. You're supposed to be my partner, luv, can you not see that-"
"You're not missing out on much, don't worry. I can't fuck anybody for at least another week anyway."
"What the bloody fuck are you talking about?"
The door to the bathroom opens behind you at maybe the worst moment in history, revealing Gary, still a little damp-haired from the shower. His boots squeak against the floor as he pauses in his step, watching the conversation confusedly.
Gaz's eyes widen, and before you can stop him, he's giving you the nastiest glare you've got in your life, spitting words like venom.
"Oh, so that's why you've been so distant, huh?"
Words choke and tangle in your throat as you look forward at him, watch the resentment in his eyes undoubtedly grow into a bruning hatred.
"It's not-" You try to start, but you never get to finish.
"No no, I get it. Must be real hard hiding how much of a slag you are from the team, yeah?"
You're not sure if you want to punch him or cry out of anger. You end up doing neither, clenching your hands into fists to avoid dishing out pain.
Gary looks confused, and you lack the control to hold any amount of civility anymore. He didn't need to be involved with this.
You didn't want Gary to think you were some sort of slut. Not him.
"I had an appendectomy, you stupid prick! Days ago, if you really wanna know"
You've never been one to raise your voice. It feels rude, but when Gaz quiets, there's nothing to be done but go in for the kill.
"You didn't pick up. I could have died in a bathroom stall because you were so busy that you couldn't check your phone and help me."
Gary puts his hand on your shoulder as you step forward, silently talking you back from wailing on Gaz in the middle of the gym.
When you look back, he signs to you.
There's time for that later.
You grit your teeth, but nod, offering a simple affirmative sign in return before turning back to Gaz with venom on your tongue.
"Fuck you. If I see your face before the end of my break, I'll make sure no one ever calls you pretty again, hear me?"
He could beat the shit out of you. But he doesn't. Gaz looks... upset. You can't muster sympathy right now.
"Break?"
Gaz questions, quiet-voiced and not quite looking you in the eyes.
"Yeah, the brass gives you breaks after fuckin' surgery, numb-nuts. Might as well take it if I've got it, right?"
You're verbally shoving his face into the curb, grinding your boots down on his throat. It feels better than you thought it would, finally just letting it all out.
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*Gary packed an extra hoodie because you seemed to like them. He's a little sad you didn't get to enjoy it too much. He has a feeling he might have more work to do for you to feel that comfortable again. (P.s. really just need to get it out of my drafts at this point, looking at it makes me sick now. So, enjoy what you can. Take it, my children.)
Been looking for this for at LEAST three years.
me holding a gun to a mushroom: tell me the name of god you fungal piece of shit
mushroom: can you feel your heart burning? can you feel the struggle within? the fear within me is beyond anything your soul can make. you cannot kill me in a way that matters
me cocking the gun, tears streaming down my face: I’M NOT FUCKING SCARED OF YOU
Word count= roughly 1,750
Warnings: No! Just fluff with the lads :) Enjoy (but inly if you wanna)!!!
Kyle, who really never thought that knitting would be this hard, considering how much you raved about it keeping you both calm and properly stimulated. Now, he sits by your side on the living room floor, shakily holding two bamboo needles in his hands and trying to hold the "working yarn" (the yarn attached to the ball, apparently) the right way as you tenderly lecture him for being a dunce. "No, baby, you need to get through the stitch first before you yarn over-" Your voice is so pretty like that, trying to steer him from making another weird-looking hole for no real reason, but Kyle just whines again as you take the swatch into your own hands, finish off the whole row like some magic creature of the yarn and thread.
"You said that this was supposed to be easy, luvie." He whines into the crook of your neck, having loosely wound himself around your side as you showed him exactly what to do for the fourth time this hour. Some part of him loves the unfailing tenderness, the softness of your voice and the way you poorly hide the fact that you're laughing at him under your breath. "Sorry, i just thought-" There's a snort from your lips as giggles envelop you, your smile turns wide. Kyle's heart melts a little in his chest "I just thought you'd be better at this-"
Kyle gasps in mock offense, before pushing the needles to the floor, already planning his revenge for that little slight. "Say that one more time, and I'll give yer little magic sticks to my nieces and tell 'em they're swords." He revels in the shocked gasp you give, and grins as you bat him upside the head. "Hah, funny man. Try." Your voice is quieter, a little bit more dangerous, just daring him to do that very thing. Kyle saves his own ass by pecking your cheek, gently taking your hands into his own. "I wouldn't, babes, you know I wouldn't." There's not a modicum of lie in that statement. Kyle knows that the sweetest ones are the most terrifying, and his mum would never let him hear the end of it if he lost you. "Yeah, I do know you wouldn't, jus' wanted to mess with you." It's Kyle's turn to gasp now, but he smiles when you kiss his cheek in return, leans into you like a lapdog despite himself. Tonight's going to be good, and he knows it.
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Johnny, who remarkably managed very, very well with embroidery. You had been so happy to see him, posted on the couch next to you, working away at the hoop, having only very few questions on how he should hold the thing, if the tension you kept talking about was a little bit off. For an hour, maybe two, it was lovely. Simple silence as you leaned up on his shoulder, working a larger project as the Scot figured out exactly what he was doing on his own. Deft hands, you watched him pick apart the small knots in the thread without issue. It flooded your heart with pride. "Are you finally going to let me see the thing, Johnny?" You questioned playfully, trying to straighten your spine to get a peek before there's a big hand shoved over your eyes, and a thick accent chiding you for your gall. "No!" He squawks, you just know that he relishes in not letting you see, riling you up through your own curiosity, because Johnny is, at his core, a cheeky little shit. "Ye gotta wait, mo leannan, ye cannae jus' peek like that!" It draws a grumble from your lips, but you close your eyes, gently take hold of his wrist in your hand and nod, giving a softer affirmation before he coos at you. "Don' worry, it's almost done anyway." He soothes you with a soft peck to your temple, and just like that, you're calm again, all heart-eyed and dumb with love, relaxed. It's another thirty minutes before the finished product is tenderly set into your lap, and you gasp in surprise before seeing it. It's... stupid. An old sketch of his that really had amused him all too much, one of you from a picture at a night out (you had tripped on a root and he managed to get a picture of your face mid-fall) that he had always seemed too damn enamored with. "Oh my god." You press your hand to your face in shame, already feeling ridiculous before Johnny laughs brightly, pressed a firm, wet kiss to your cheek. "You look lovely! Don't ye? I think you look lovely." It's a sweet sentiment, enough to endear you to the terrible, terrible thing that your fiancé has chosen to immortalize and drive a too-fond sigh from your lips. "You're lucky that I love you." You grumble, giving Johnny a half-hearted glare before he swoops in to sweetly kiss your lips, because he really does know you too well. "Aye, I really am" He doesn't miss a beat, still grinning like an idiot. It makes your chest soften, your guts go mushy and fluttery. "Don't be coy, MacTavish." You reprimand. He grins, and kisses you again for good measure.
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Simon, who really didn't think this would be necessary, but here he is, sitting next to you cross-legged on the floor with the hook in hand. "Like this, right?" He speaks gruffly, and loosens his posture for you to peek over his shoulder. He feels the ghost (pun intended) of a smile pulling up at his lips when he hears your affirmative hum. "Yeah. You're doing real good, honey," Your voice wafts into his ear so nicely, floods his mind so deliciously, the only person that Simon knew he would always listen to, his angel right here on Earth. "Out of curiosity, have you ever done this before?" When you finish your question, Simon does let that smile grow on his face, lets the warmth flood into the cavity of his chest, seep into the crevices of his soul, heal the damage bit by bit. Simon leans his head on yours, and takes in a breath. The truth was, he had. One night, after a particular date when you had entirely infodumped a current project to him, he had done a little research. Then, promptly after, learned to crochet, even if it was only the basics. It paid off now, with you on his arm and impressed with his skill. "Nah. Maybe I'm just good at this, hm?" He denies that, shuffles his cheek closer into yours, soaking up the warmth that you radiate, relishes in the soft chuckle that you give. "Mmh, maybe you're gonna be even better than me, is that your plan?" Your teasing is soft, given out of affection. It makes Simon smile, makes him relieved that he's once again managed to make sure that a date went well. "No. Just pick things up fast." The mood really is dead in the water, but Simon really loves that you seem to thrive in that, that you still peck his cheek anyway despite him practically having negative game. "Smartass." You chirp at him, setting down your own piece on the floor before wholesale resting your head on Simon's shoulder. He fights a chuckle. "Better than being a dumbass, isn't it?" The joke wasn't his (he stole it from Johnny), but when you laughed, Simon knew it was well worth it anyway.
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John, who was more than content to help you work on another big project of yours. He was endlessly proud of you, how wonderfully you worked on those commissions and how perfect they always looked when you finally shipped them off. But disaster always strikes at one time or another, and the cat is often the cause of that. After maybe an hour of soothing his panicking partner, John had you wrapped up in a blanket in the corner of your own office, gently taking the needle into his own hands to sew the small tear in the fabric back together as you sniffled a little bit. Were you more than skilled enough to fix this issue yourself? Yes. But John felt particularly loving lately, wanted to make sure that his lovely, hyper-competent partner knew that they could rely on him. Because they always could. When he speaks, its gently, glancing up from the fabric in his hands to look into your eyes, still a little bit bloodshot from the tears. "Don't worry yourself, sweetheart. My mother didn't raise a man who doesn't know how to do repairs." The comfort was genuine, both an assurance of his skill and a statement that you could just lay back, let him take the reins for once and allow you to calm down a little bit. "But-" you sniffle, wipe at your nose with a tissue, and John doesn't allow you to question this. "Nope. None of that self-doubt, yer therapist already said that's bad, didn't she?" You nod, John watches your cheeks flush a bit simply because he remembered, that he cared enough to stow that away in the back corners of his brain. Oh, if only you knew how much he adores you, your little heart would blow up. "I can't just let you do my work for me, John, that's not right." The small rebuttal makes him pause in the middle of a stitch, gently set the needle down. His darling had the morals of a saint, why was he surprised by that? "Who said that I was doing your work? Maybe I'm just your guest of honor, sweetness." John speaks softly, shoots you a cocky grin that finally brings a smile back onto your face. "Yeah, yeah, alright," He smiles as you stand, wraps a strong arm around your midsection as you tuck yourself into his side, calming all of the way back down, turning back into the wonderful, sweet, bordering perfect partner returning to form once more. "That means that you have to sign it, too, you know." You tease in return as John nervously swallows, knowing damn well he is hopeless to ever replicate the pure beauty that is your signature on professional pieces. "Well, I'm not so sure about that-" He uselessly stutters to the joke, feeling his own cheeks heat up more than a little bit at the invitation. "Oh, don't be like that, I could teach you." Now that makes Price melt.
always wanted to make one of these myself, so here's the propaganda blorbos!
+ one(1) ✨vintage✨ ghoap
part two of ???
sorry to all y'all, I'm being evil. The lie is only technically a lie. If requested, I will tell the truth after the poll's over. Update: all of you were SO wrong. My god.
fuck it. tag game
make a poll where the options are two truths and one lie and have your followers guess the lie
I’ll go first
npt: @starkissed-mars @l1ve-l4ugh-lov3craft @garden-of-runar @loozerboykisser @aesthetic-writer18 + anyone else who wants to <3
Warnings: Nikolai is a less-depressed bisexual man! kiss on the cheek, kiss on the mouth (yes, in that order), Joanna finally gets to rest peacefully in her hangar.
Good things can't last forever.
Nikolai knows this. You know this too.
Still, you've exhausted every last avenue before finally admitting that there are just somethings that are no longer fixable.
It's a slow trudge to your apartment, one that apparently wakes the sleeping bear that is your favorite Russian, napping on your couch like he didn't have your full (repeated) permission to use your bed.
Nikolai perks, but his brows furrow when he sees your slight exhaustion.
"механик?" His voice is soft, gently probing just how badly you've managed to overwork yourself in the few hours he's been unconscious. Judging by the new scrape on the elbow and the small burn on the side of your palm, far too much.
He sits all the way up just in time to catch you as you fall onto him, grunting in response to the new weight but handling it well, all things considered.
"I'm sorry, Nik."
There is no question that this single moment is solemn. In some silly way, you'd also grown attached to Joanna, busted as she was. She was your best project yet, your most impressive feat.
It was also the project that introduced you to your best friend, and that was something you couldn't ever replace.
Still, Nikolai holds you to his big, warm body, sighing heavily as he nestles his chin into the nook between your neck and shoulder, taking in your warmth and gently scratching the skin with his dark stubble. Just a bit longer than usual. "I know. I shouldn't have taken her to you, just the scrapyard."
He's quiet, too quiet, and it prompts you to maneuver backward, brows set in a firm line.
"Woah, woah, Nicky-boy, don't get too far ahead of me. Not yet."
He raises a brow, prompts you to continue. There's a sparkle of hope in his eyes.
"One last flight. You can give her one last, gentle flight."
God, you're a fucking angel. Nikolai feels his pupils turn into what might as well be cartoon hearts at the news.
He squeezes you so tight that something in your back cracks. The little squeal it pulls from you makes his heart thrum in his chest terribly fast.
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Nikolai could swear he had never set up for a flight so quickly as he did today.
He was just a man, one who was very much weak to finally getting you where he was the expert, quizzing you to see just how much you knew was going on when he was in the air.
You were still dead-out on the bed. Well, more like halfway on the bed, considering your whole left side was hanging over the edge, hand most definitely cold in the harsh cold front bringing the chill inside.
Who is Nikolai to do anything but warm it for you? What kind of friend would he be if he didn't tenderly take your hand into the both of his, gently breathe out a puff of air to bring heat back to the extremity.
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Your eyes open with an incoherent grumble and a glare.
"Whatthe fffuhhhk, Nik?"
His smile is the first thing you focus on, an overly excited smile like he's a child on Christmas, breaking into their parent's room to wake them up far too early, too.
"Up. Fly time."
Your brain takes a second or two to chug back into "able to think" station, and you sit up with a long yawn.
"God, It's like-" You turn to read the small alarm clock on the side of your nightstand, the softly glowing letters are too dull to see without a squint. "It's 0530 hours." Nikolai answers right as you read the digits, and snickers to himself when you groan.
"Contrary to your beliefs, I can, in fact, read."
"Yeah, but you take a long time. I am much faster."
You groan again, just for dramatic effect, before raising up the covers to get ready.
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Being behind the wheel (?) of one of these things is something you can admit you haven't done in a damned long time.
Still, Nikolai looked so... excited, who were you to not let him have this little thing? Of course you hopped on, let him narrate your way into the air.
Your only qualm was the music, really. Nikolai, he is truly a wonderful, wonderful man, but that fucking metal is godawful. Saying what needs to be said of not distracting your helicopter pilot, you reach over and change the station anyway.
Everyone likes Queen anyway, it's not like Nikolai will care that much.
Wrong. Apparently, the universe is plotting against you, because right as the new song starts, a very familiar piano backing track and one Freddie Mercury is singing about gay longing again.
Goodness dude, now?!
When Nikolai grunts in your general direction, tenses a bit in his seat, you shrug.
"That garbage metal is a risk to your fucking person, Nik. Eyes forward."
You try to bark the order, but you're smiling, and so is he.
"Sure, but this one? Are you trying to send a message, perhaps?"
He's got this stupid, shit-eating grin on his face, but you don't bat at his shoulder like you usually would, for fear of actually throwing him off (you know you won't, but you still worry).
"Ssssshhhhhh, quiet. Focus."
You can see Nikolai rolling his eyes, but he smiles, keeps on flying.
It's... perfect, really. Your hand fits comfortably into the hold, but you don't use it, because you trust the man piloting this thing with your life.
The scenery is dark, illuminated almost entirely by the moon, but the first rays of the sun are already spilling over the horizon in their beautiful rivulets, staining the sky with oranges and pinks, tattooing the undersides of the wispy, feather-like clouds with their hues.
For the rest of the flight, there are not words exchanged, just the quiet sounds of the music and the rotors, muted by the thick headset Nikolai had given you so the noise wouldn't be overwhelming.
That made your chest warm, you can admit it. You were in no drought of little favors and good deeds, not with your Russian hanging around so much.
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Still, none of those things could have prepared you for landing.
Sunrise was in full swing, and you figured it's be cute to watch it with Nikolai, but he seemingly had other plans.
The second he helped you out of Joanne's seat, he pulled you close to his chest, wrapped you up in thick arms, and pressed a firm kiss to your cheek.
He feels your cheek heat beneath his lips, craves it like nothing else, but Nikolai still pulls back sheepish, smiling halfway like he was doing anything wrong.
"And... what's that for, Nik?" You question through a smile, not even taking a moment to question it. Just excited to finally have this moment, to finally get it all out there.
"You are–" The tips of his ears are red, he knows it from how you giggle, and he grumbles the rest of it "You are good, механик. Too good."
You seize the opportunity the second it's presented to you.
It's a snappy motion, but a smooth one, as you manage to capture Nikolai's lips with your own, slotting your mouth to his without hesitation nor remorse. No more pussy-footing around this.
Seemingly, fortune does actually favor the bold, because Nikolai melts like butter in your hands, crouching just to lift you up into his arms, not once breaking the connection between you two.
There is no heat. No pressure. No want for anything but each other.
When he pulls back, it's a moment Nikolai truly mourns. He could have died right then, and died happy. Still, seeing you like this, bundled up in his arms and smiling, he knows he's got a lot more living to do.
Not just surviving. Living. With you, if you'll let him (spoiler: you will).
"I'll make breakfast, механик." He lets the words leave his lips in a lovesick sigh, so dreadfully weak before his darling engineer, a simple man aching to finally have them as close to him as possible.
"Oh, you're only getting better." When you coo down at him, you pretend to be much more confident than you are. You know, though, you're no better than him, a lovestruck idiot so hopelessly caught in the snare that you're enjoying your time here.
You hope he never lets you go. Nikolai hopes for the same.
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You don't learn until years later, long after Joanna is decommissioned and a small scrap of her metal lies around both your and Nikolai's ring fingers in a thin band, that you learn he still names his planes.
His new thing, still fresh. A C-130 Hercules. Much too big for your space, but you also don't do very many repairs for your fiancé unless it's basic woodwork, either. Metal work gets tiring fast, and now that you had someone to take breaks for, why shouldn't you take them?
It's a casual dinner when he brings it up, tells you that you do have a plane named after you, actually, and that it's his, too. Beaming so bright he could rival the sun.
"Mhm? What do you call it, Ласточка?"
He could melt at your voice speaking his mother tongue, but he finishes the thought anyway.
"неразлучник."
Follow if you want the musings of my decaying mind.Updates Fridays (mostly afternoon) and weekends, if you want extra details on what/when, feel free to send in an ask!
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