Nico Robin 🌸

spider crew

me, about to explain something to someone: h

my brain: already on the 5th paragraph of this essay of information I wish to impart, having completely forgotten where this train of thought started

hi everyone i hope you dont mind if i

(hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws) (hits you with my paws)

Look what I found!

So my therapist has been helping me get to grips with my ADHD, and also the concept that I’m not shit at being an adult, I just can’t do things the way everyone has always told me to do them. Like every single “organize your life” books have always left me wanting to cry with frustration, and after I got hold of a copy of Organizing Solutions for People with ADHD by Susan Pinsky I realized that was because they primarily focus on “aesthetic” over “function”. And the function of most standard “organize your life books” is to “make things look Show Home Perfect”.

So the standard “hide all your unsightly things by doing xyz” may look nice for the first week or so, but by the end of the week it’ll look like a tornado made of pure inhuman frustration ripped through the house as I try to find the fucking advil.

To give you an example of the kind of hell I’ve been fumbling my way through the last 20 odd years: dishes will be washed and left in the drying wrack but never put away. Which means I can’t wash more dishes, which means dishes pile up, which means I can’t make food, which means I don’t eat, which means my CFS gets worse, which means I don’t have the energy to put the dishes away, and so on so forth until I have a meltdown, cry to ETD (who also likely has ADHD but has never had it confirmed) about how I can’t cope with life, and then we fix it for a while, but inevitably end up back at square one within about a week.

Pinsky’s solution to this was “remove an obstacle between you and your goal, if that means taking all the doors off your kitchen cabinets to make things easier, so be it.”

And lemme tell you, fucking revolutionary.

Laundry never ends up in the hamper??? why???? is it a closed hamper??? Remove the lid. Throw it out the window. Clothes are now miraculously finding their way into the hamper??? Rejoice????

Mail ends up spread out over every available flat surface? Put a sorting station right where your mail arrives. Put a shredder or “junk” basket under it. Shred or dump the junk immediately. Realize you only actually have two real letters that need attention, feel less overwhelmed, pay your bills on time.

Like I’m not saying this book is miraculous, but it did help me realize that I was effectively torturing myself by trying to conform to certain ideals of “perfect house keeping”, and presenting a certain image rather than just allowing myself to live in my space as effectively as possible. And why? Why was I doing that? Cause people with different lives and capabilities are perceived as the norm? Fuck that. If this was a physical problem I wouldn’t be forcing myself to conform to an ableist standard, so why am I doing it with this?

My lived space will never look a certain way, and that’s okay. It will never look show home perfect, and that’s okay. It will likely always be cluttered and eclectic where nothing matches, and that’s okay. Sometimes I will have odd socks on because sorting them out required too much mental energy, and that’s okay. Actually fuck sorting socks, just buy all your socks in the same color. Problem solved. Boring sure, but also one less thing to do, which means more time to hyper fixate on fun things. Which really, what else is my life for if not to write screeds and screeds of vampire shit posts, I ask you.

“This Is Why You’re Always So Tired”

Make your big bad a grouping of liches/demons based on the seven sins.

Pride: The best magic user. There is NO ONE better than them. No one will EVER be better than them.

Envy: A man turned lich out of fear after his elven wife left him so she wouldn’t watch him die. He terrorizes all her lovers.

Gluttony: Consumed by their constant hunger from their former life they now devour the souls of lost and weary travelers and children.

Sloth: once a lazy king who ruled a great floating kingdom, he turned lich after he refused to put out the effort to stop a sorceress from destroying everything. She cursed him to a life of being bound by his soul to the very throne he would sink with. He saps life from the ocean without even lifting a finger.

Lust: A lich who lusts after bodies. They are constantly jumping from body to body. Trying to sate their lust for the next best looking body.

Greed: A lich who collects parts. He collects as many parts as he can to build horrible monsters in his lab. He will stop at nothing to get the best parts.

Wrath: A former man who died in his prime. Death turned him hateful and twisted. He believes that life is pointless and that death will always win out. He wishes greatly to see the flame of life sniffed out entirely.

(Disclaimer: these versions are just my ideas feel free to modify them and come up with your own!)

I want a relationship that is completely undefinable by any existing labels or words. Like, we're so close and we hug and kiss each other's foreheads and cuddle and travel and explore together, and we get along so well and have so much in common. But at the same time, our relationship isn't fully romantic or fully platonic; it's a completely separate, open-to-interpretation thing that we tweaked as needed, and we have our own boundaries and things we are and aren't comfortable with, and we respect each other in every way, shape, and form.

Thank this person so much for making this post. You have my love❤❤❤

I feel like people with RSD deserve to feel a little bit brave for simply deciding again and again to try to form relationships and friendships and choosing to participate in their communities. Like, if every day you run the risk of feeling like you just got punched in the chest because somebody looked at you askance and you still decide to get out of bed and interact with people you’re doing well and being brave in a way few people will ever understand.

my pride post i think