An Article from Neena Susan Thomas
“Through a rapist’s eyes. A group of rapists and date rapists in prison were interview…ed on what they look for in a potential victim and here are some interesting facts:
1] The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle. They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, bun! , braid, or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed. They are also likely to go after a woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common targets.
2] The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for women who’s clothing is easy to remove quickly. Many of them carry scissors around to cut clothing.
3] They also look for women using their cell phone, searching through their purse or doing other activities while walking because they are off guard and can be easily overpowered.
4] The number one place women are abducted from / attacked at is grocery store parking lots.
5] Number two is office parking lots/garages.
6] Number three is public restrooms.
7] The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a woman and quickly move her to a second location where they don’t have to worry about getting caught.
8] If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute or two for them to realize that going after you isn’t worth it because it will be time-consuming.
9] These men said they would not pick on women who have umbrellas,or other similar objects that can be used from a distance, in their hands.
10] Keys are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to the attacker to use them as a weapon. So, the idea is to convince these guys you’re not worth it.
POINTS THAT WE SHOULD REMEMBER:
1] If someone is following behind you on a street or in a garage or with you in an elevator or stairwell, look them in the face and ask them a question, like what time is it, or make general small talk: can’t believe it is so cold out here, we’re in for a bad winter. Now that you’ve seen their faces and could identify them in a line- up, you lose appeal as a target.
2] If someone is coming toward you, hold out your hands in front of you and yell Stop or Stay back! Most of the rapists this man talked to said they’d leave a woman alone if she yelled or showed that she would not be afraid to fight back. Again, they are looking for an EASY target.
3] If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate of it and carries it with him wherever he goes,) yelling I HAVE PEPPER SPRAY and holding it out will be a deterrent.
4] If someone grabs you, you can’t beat them with strength but you can do it by outsmarting them. If you are grabbed around the waist from behind, pinch the attacker either under the arm between the elbow and armpit or in the upper inner thigh – HARD. One woman in a class this guy taught told him she used the underarm pinch on a guy who was trying to date rape her and was so upset she broke through the skin and tore out muscle strands the guy needed stitches. Try pinching yourself in those places as hard as you can stand it; it really hurts.
5] After the initial hit, always go for the groin. I know from a particularly unfortunate experience that if you slap a guy’s parts it is extremely painful. You might think that you’ll anger the guy and make him want to hurt you more, but the thing these rapists told our instructor is that they want a woman who will not cause him a lot of trouble. Start causing trouble, and he’s out of there.
6] When the guy puts his hands up to you, grab his first two fingers and bend them back as far as possible with as much pressure pushing down on them as possible. The instructor did it to me without using much pressure, and I ended up on my knees and both knuckles cracked audibly.
7] Of course the things we always hear still apply. Always be aware of your surroundings, take someone with you if you can and if you see any odd behavior, don’t dismiss it, go with your instincts. You may feel little silly at the time, but you’d feel much worse if the guy really was trouble.
FINALLY, PLEASE REMEMBER THESE AS WELL ….
1. Tip from Tae Kwon Do: The elbow is the strongest point on your body. If you are close enough to use it, do it.
2. Learned this from a tourist guide to New Orleans : if a robber asks for your wallet and/or purse, DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM. Toss it away from you…. chances are that he is more interested in your wallet and/or purse than you and he will go for the wallet/purse. RUN LIKE MAD IN THE OTHER DIRECTION!
3. If you are ever thrown into the trunk of a car: Kick out the back tail lights and stick your arm out the hole and start waving like crazy. The driver won’t see you but everybody else will. This has saved lives.
4. Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping,eating, working, etc., and just sit (doing their checkbook, or making a list, etc. DON’T DO THIS! The predator will be watching you, and this is the perfect opportunity for him to get in on the passenger side,put a gun to your head, and tell you where to go. AS SOON AS YOU CLOSE the DOORS , LEAVE.
5. A few notes about getting into your car in a parking lot, or parking garage:
a. Be aware: look around your car as someone may be hiding at the passenger side , peek into your car, inside the passenger side floor, and in the back seat. ( DO THIS TOO BEFORE RIDING A TAXI CAB) .
b. If you are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the passenger door. Most serial killers attack their victims by pulling them into their vans while the women are attempting to get into their cars.
c. Look at the car parked on the driver’s side of your vehicle, and the passenger side. If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest your car, you may want to walk back into the mall, or work, and get a guard/policeman to walk you back out. IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY. (And better paranoid than dead.)
6. ALWAYS take the elevator instead of the stairs. (Stairwells are horrible places to be alone and the perfect crime spot).
7. If the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS RUN! The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times; And even then, it most likely WILL NOT be a vital organ. RUN!
8. As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic: STOP IT! It may get you raped, or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a good-looking, well educated man, who ALWAYS played on the sympathies of unsuspecting women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often asked “for help” into his vehicle or with his vehicle, which is when he abducted his next victim.
Send this to any woman you know that may need to be reminded that the world we live in has a lot of crazies in it and it’s better safe than sorry.
If u have compassion reblog this post. ‘Helping hands are better than Praying Lips’ – give us your helping hand.
REBLOG THIS AND LET EVERY GIRL KNOW AT LEAST PEOPLE WILL KNOW WHATS GOING ON IN THIS WORLD. So please reblog this….Your one reblog can Help to spread this information.
THIS COULD ACTUALLY SAVE A LIFE.”
100 good questions to ask your friends at 4:02 am when you can’t sleep (can also function as an asks list)
Are you bothered by your cosmic insignificance?
Do you mourn for a place or person you’ve never known?
Do you really think there is somebody for everybody?
Do you place any value in gender roles?
Do you have to be related to be family?
Are your platonic relationships just as valuable as romantic or family ones?
Are you in love? Do you want to be?
Do you think you can put love into categories (family, platonic, romantic, etc.) or is it just one general sensation?
Would you be happy with a life without romance?
Are you always going to be a little in love with somebody?
Would you change your appearance if you could?
Do you have the feeling you’ve lost something you might have had in another life - whether it be a person, a place, a world, a language, etc.?
Do you believe in reincarnation?
Would you want to be reincarnated?
Do you think you’re special, or just another person amongst billions? Can you be both?
Do theoretical ethical debates have any value? Is it important people discuss ethical dilemmas, e.g. the trolley problem?
Did you have imaginary friends? Do you still have them?
Are you religious? Do you think your religion is ‘correct’?
If you aren’t religious, do you wish you were? Why?
Do you want a grand adventure?
Do you have somebody, whether it be a friend or stranger, who you think you could have loved if the circumstances were different?
How long does it take you to fall in love with somebody?Is the sensation of ‘falling in love’ or ‘being in love’ better?
Is love about convenience or something more? Can it be about both?
Do you think you really understand your gender and sexuality?
How fluid is your concept of gender and sexuality?
What’s the most life-changing choice you’ve made so far?
Are you afraid of growing old?
Would you want to live forever? How about for a billion years, a million, a millennium, a century?
Do you believe in some form of god/s?
Are your choices fated or of your own free will?
Do you have a hunch about how you’re going to die?
Do you believe in star signs?
How old do you have to be to be considered an adult?
Was your childhood happy?
What are you missing from your life?
Have you ever met someone who had a very similar personality to your own? Did you get along?
Do opposites attract?
Is your life what you expected it would be five years ago?
Do you know what you want out of life?
What makes a person ‘good’? Are you a ‘good person’?
What fundamentally matters do you?
Is freewill an illusion?
Do you create art? How do you define art?
How often do you lie? Is all lying inherently bad? Are you generally truthful?
Do you want to be remembered after your death? What for?
Is true world peace ever possible?
Do you have to suffer to truly understand the human condition? What is the human condition? How can you really experience it?
Are you free? Will you ever be? Can anyone be truly free?
Do you hold yourself to higher standards than you hold others?
What do you expect from a friend or partner?
What question could you ask to find out the most about a person?
Do you justify all your beliefs or have you just inherited/absorbed some?
Which beliefs do you have that is most likely to be wrong?
Can human really understand the complete nature of the universe, space and time?
Is a conscious what makes someone a person?
What do you think about artificial intelligence?
Do you thinks humans are obsessed with escapism (books, video games, movies, etc.)? Are you looking for an escape? Do you think that’s a bad thing?
Are we eventually going to ‘run out’ of new combinations for music, art, language, etc.? Is there a limit to human creativity?
What do you think the next era of music will be like?
What do you think the next era of fashion will be like?
Do we live in tumultuous times, or do they just seem so strange because we’re living in them?
Would you want to meet a clone of yourself? Would you like them?
How confident are you, really?
How consistent is your perception of time?
What age should people be allowed to vote? Should children and teenagers be allowed to vote?
How do you feel about the idea ‘an eye for an eye’?
What’s the worse thing a person can be?
How do you feel about monogamy?
Can you be in love with someone and still fall in love with someone else?
What’s the tragedy of your life?
Would your life make a good play?
Should people be prosecuted for crimes that weren’t considered crimes at the time?
Would you fight for your country? Do you feel a sense of loyalty to your nation?
Do you believe in gender equality in every aspect?
Do we have a moral obligation to care for others? To what extent?
Do you crave approval and/or praise?
Is there comedy in all tragedy and tragedy in all comedy?
Are you ever going to be satisfied?
When you are sad, do you listen to music that conveys your emotions or music that makes you happy?
Is your music organised by mood or sensation or do you just listen to everything at any time?
Would you marry a friend if they needed you to (e.g. for citizenship)?
Are you a deep person?
Given the chance to live your life on Mars, with no hope of returning to Earth but with the promise of scientific discovery and glory, would you take it?
Are you who people think you are?
Do you think you would be happier if you had been born a different gender, sexuality, race, ethnicity, nationality or religion?
What’s your toxic trait? Are you trying to improve yourself and fix it?
Do you anger easily?
Are you a jealous person?
If you lost all your memories, would you have the same personality?
Given the chance to reset your life (with none of the knowledge you currently have), would you take it?
Is hate as strong as love? Who do you hate?
Do you speak multiple languages? Which do you dream in? What language would you want to learn?
Do you draw meaning from your dreams, or do you disregard them?
How would you describe yourself when you love? Do you love forcefully, unconditionally, gently, quietly, desperately?
Is unrequited love real love?
Is your perception of yourself similar or the same to how others perceive you?
Are you overly analytical?
Do you ever feel that you are really a terrible person, and only act good out of societal or some other obligation?
Do you believe in magic? Are you superstitious?
What belief do you have that isn’t logically grounded, but you still firmly believe in?
glass, irony and good, anne carson // margaret atwood // enough, suzanne buffam // linnea paskow // in conversation: kathleen turner, david marchese // haunted womanhood, heather havrilesky // where to begin, sue zhao // the stream of life, clarice lisepector
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What changes is this:
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Or, Suguru extends an offer on that day in Shinjuku. Satoru accepts it.
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Until a mission changes that.
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or, Suguru is a contract killer. his final target is Satoru Gojo. this isn't a problem until it is.
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Crickets chirp throughout the night and the bed is too warm to sleep in, so he buries his face into pillows that smell like dust and salt and ignores the stabbing behind his eyes till he can feel the irritating warmth of another day on his back.
I miss the sea, he thinks, staring at the familiar outline of the window, palm resting on the friend-shaped dent on his bed. Exhaustion drapes itself over his shoulders and sweat beads like pearls at the roots of his hair.
I miss the sea like I miss my friend
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“Yeah! Oh, my name is Gojo Satoru, by the way.” He hides the hurt behind his teeth, his grin wide and friendly. He thought he’d only have to introduce himself once to someone he called his best friend. It’s strange to repeat words from more than a decade ago to the same person. “You can call me Satoru.” He hopes he calls him Satoru.
“I’m Geto,” he says back. You were Suguru to me, Gojo thinks. “Nice to meet you, Satoru.”
“Nice to meet you, too.” He leans against the wall beside him, tries to look nonchalant as he does. “So, do you come here often?”
Geto thinks Gojo is just a lonely guy who wants friends. Gojo just wants to know if he remembers him, even just a little bit.
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Huh,” he muses. “Are you… saving yourself for marriage?”
“Nope.”
“Are you asexual?”
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the one in which Satoru doesn't run away at sunrise and has an existential crisis over morning sex.
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“You’re a menace,” Suguru mutters.
“You do this all the time? Making clay dicks before you turn them into bowls and vases? And it took some loser dude you met at age 27 for you to realize you like dick?”
--
Suguru is a potter and Satoru is in love.
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Upon arriving at the scene, it’s hard to say whether turning up just five minutes earlier would have made much of a difference.
As it stands, there is a lot of blood. Too much blood to be explained away, and too many strong residuals to be traced back to anyone other than Satoru.
Or, Suguru arrives at the Time Vessel Association hideout a little too late. This changes things.
John Green & David Levithan, Will Grayson, Will Grayson // @sweatermuppet // Jamaica Kincaid, The Autobiography of My Mother // Entropy, "Luck" // Anne Sexton, A Self-Portrait In Letters // @100493503004422 // I'm Not a Good Person—Pat The Bunny // Veronica Roth, Insurgent
{Juansen Dizon, I Am The Architect of My Own Destruction page 24/ Anaïs Nin, The Diary of Anaïs Nin, Vol. 6: 1955-1966/ Alice Hoffman, The Red Garden/ Anaïs Nin, from The Diary of Anaïs Nin, Vol. 5: 1947-1955/ Haruki Murakami: Norwegian Wood, page 276/ Michael Ondaatje/ Catherynne M. Valente, The Orphan's Tales: In the Night Garden/ D.H. Lawrence, from The Complete Works; The Plumbed Serpent/ Jean-Paul Sartre, from No Exit/ Alice Notley, from In The Pines: Poems; "In The Pines,"}
the shades of magic trilogy by ve schwab
queer author (uses she/they pronouns, is openly gay)
queer characters
characters of color
disabled protagonist
gorgeous prose + worldbuilding
a film adaptation is in the works!
a sequel trilogy of books is currently in the works!! it’s going to be called threads of power and it sounds amazing so far
the grishaverse by leigh bardugo
queer characters (literally so many across so many identities)
characters of color
multiple disabled protagonists (and the author is disabled too!)
IMPECCABLE worldbuilding and writing
it has a netflix series called shadow & bone that’s an absolute banger! season 2 is on the way too :))
an ember in the ashes by sabaa tahir
inspired by ancient rome
strong female protagonists who don’t hate on other women
non-toxic male love interests
absolutely heartbreaking
extremely intense (look up content warnings if you’re worried!)
many characters of color (+author is a poc too)
these violent delights by chloe gong
characters of color (+author is a poc too)
queer characters (including trans rep!)
an absolutely incredible love story (enemies to friends to lovers to enemies to it’s complicated?)
romeo and juliet retelling set in 1920s shanghai and featuring rival gangs—need i say more?
look up content warnings, especially if you’re scared of bugs!!!
Another great graphic from @popsci
Batman 129 Variant Cover by Simone Di Meo