pienyami
♥︎ ₓₓ cute darkness ҅ ҅
243 posts
Latest Posts by pienyami
why r all mental related terms being used as jokes and insults omfg
if it werent for other landmines tagging nso in their posts i wouldnt have ever found jiraiblr
i feel like the "jirai lifestyle" is more like a "jirai mentality" cuz its not really like a full on lifestyle n more like a mindset somewhat
sometimes i forget cvtting urself n sui thoughts arent just silly goofy things
idk tbh i deserve constant hate like... am i a bad person?? def. idk i cant even understand myself how am i gonna understand others
yeh... no therapist is "fixing" me im rotten to the core
i wish i could dissapear, remove myself from reality, become one with death.
do those feeling ever go away? will i always be like this? will i break one day and give in? should i even care about my future if i don't know how long i'll last?
sorry if this is too much i just feel like i'm so close to giving up.
(changed cuz i honestly hate my original response)
ermmm idk how to comfort ppl n all so im not rlly gonna talk about it... n im the worst person to get advice or anything whatsoever from... but ty for expressing ur thoughts to me through this ask of urs!! just know i appreciate u for still being here :3
(sorry idk im not positive myself so i cant give advice without it going "yeah u should do it")
It makes me feel a bit better that you like me. Don't know why though. Maybe because I ask questions people never really bother to ask or maybe I'm just that weird to ask them. But nonetheless. You giving me that small hope you can actually like me does something to my brain. Nothing perverted of course. Just that maybe we could be friends... maybe I could have you as my only friend, just mine and I am yours. But then it kinda hurted when you said you wanted to die. To make friends with someone like that again. Not saying you aren't a wonderful person because you could so be a wonderful person, just hurts to hear a potential friend wants to die and I don't know if I'll be ready to add another person to my list to save even though I need as much as saving as them.
Just, I hope you treat yourself well no matter how you die. Hope you give yourself a treat in any shape or form because I think you deserve at least one treat even if you can't fathom giving yourself one or don't want to. We only live once so even if you only get one kind thing in this world, whether it gets ripped out of your hands later in life, I hope you just enjoy the moment whatever treat you give yourself.
- 💮
im rlly glad i could even be ever so slightly impactful to how u feel tbh :] but sorry for making u feel hurt in any way. idk im prob a bit too insensitive regarding how ppl feel n tend to throw a bunch of gloom all over their face without a second thought about howd theyd react. so so sorry genuinely!! dont feel pressured to be a "savior" or that one therapist friend to others like me just because theyre struggling themselves. you deserve as much help, but dont deserve to carry burdens of others just because it feels like the right thing. its not your job or an obligation to comfort others and all. just being there like giving asks like these are enough and already so much, which itself is still not a requirement. so dont feel responsible for such a thing. u dont need to prove anything or whatever negative thought that may pop up! ^^ tytytyty sm for ur words!! stuff like this touches the heart i never knew i had n is something i cherish sm. it just gives that warm feel good feeling in ur brain uve talked abt urself earlier..! like this message also applies to u cuz obv u deserve things in life that arent just pain n crap, so i really REALLY appreciate u a lot, for this, for u urself, n more. ty > <
so i can barely think straight n put a proper answer haha
sometimes the mental torture makes my head so fuzzy
that took so long to post. now ill need to charge up some mental energy to answer asks
"happy" bday to me!!! time to update my age (maybe?? idk!! im lazy)
but ty 💮 anon ily so dont think ihy or some other thing!!!! just need.................................................................................................................................................................. to disappear
im so tired .......asdlspdkasfiwhfwaf ill idk prob die again then reappear some other time/day cuz im so idk so burnt out but not rlly just kinda dead n detached.
all these notes feel so empty haha. just a burst of it only to then disappear. its like my feelings r being played with
I feel like a dick saying this but do you even care I sent you an ask? Send you two yesterday and not one has showed up. I understand you might be busy so I'm sorry. Are you busy or just ignoring me? Sorry again. Do you even like me? Sorry for asking so many questions. You probably don't give a fuck about me.
- 💮
its ok i get it. not entirely cuz you can never truly 100% understand someones feelings. but enough to get the point. ure not mean or need to apologize for feeling and thinking this way. altho im not ignoring u or anything i just sometimes cant grasp the energy to even open tumblr... like i rlly appreciate all the asks uve sent including this one tbh!! :33
n ofc i like u (/p obv) n gaf!! otherwise i wouldve instantly blocked u like i always do to ppl ^_^
What life would you have? I mean, what kind of future do you want, the one where you actually live and are happy. What makes you happy? I'm kinda interested in what you'll say. I have no idea what you will say.
- 💮
im not really interested in a future where ill be "happy" or some dream come true of a reality. i dont want anything to do with life. i want. to die.
If you're dead inside then how dead are you? Not how dead you want to be but how dead inside you are right now.
- 💮
as dead as a corpse that has rotten, oxidized, n decayed so much that its turned into fossil fuel.
KABOOM!!!!!!❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️💕💕💕💕💕❤️❤️❤️❤️💕❤️💕❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️💕💕❤️💕💕💕💕💕❤️💕❤️❤️❤️💕❤️💕💕💕❤️💕💕❤️❤️❤️❤️💕💕❤️💕💕❤️💕💕💕❤️💕💕💕💕💕💕💕❤️💕❤️❤️
(It is a love bomb :3)
TYY!!!!! :DDDD
overdosing on INTERNET all day everyday
i love being a landmine girl!!