Post Game Smooch ♥️

LMAOOOOOO

Do you ever think about how when Ron’s wand broke 2nd year, just using spell-o-tape wasn’t enough to fix it. It kept backfiring in ways that were really bad, like making himself eat slugs, or kinda just. being defective in general.

Hagrid’s wand was snapped his 3rd year. But he still uses it, disguised as an umbrella. And it works.

Like we know Ollivander didn’t fix it, since he was surprised to hear Hagrid had the pieces. Not to mention since Hagrid was expelled, it would be extremely illegal to fix it. Hogwarts works as a groundskeeper, and lives in a one room wooden hut that he made himself. He’s not going to have the money to ribe someone to fix it, and then there’s also the fact that because of his heritage, even if he could bribe someone to fix it, they probably wouldn’t. And sure, Dumbledore probably knows that Hagrid fixed his wand, there’s a certain level of deniability there. He wouldn’t have actually gotten involved with the wand mending process. Especially when Hagrid was just accused of killing a student.

So that means Hagrid would have put his wand back together himself.

The 3rd year transfiguration examination was to turn a teapot into a tortoise. Only inanimate objects into animals. Part of the reason animagi are so rare is because they’re human to animal transformations. The first time we meet Hagrid, he gives Dudley a tail, and correctly animates the boat he and Harry are on. Silently.

Harry and co. didn’t even attempt to learn silent casting until 6th year. Anything Hagrid learned after 3rd year would have been self taught.

Hagrid is one powerful wizard and holy shit combined with his resistance to magic with his giant heritage forget McGonagall holy shit Hagrid is terrifying

I keep reading so many Peter Parker in Gotham AU fanfics, and I got the worst idea ever

As most start outs go in these fics, Post SM:NWH Peter ends up in DC universe Gotham

Only difference? The Joker in this DC universe is actually an alternate version of Norman Osborn.

I know this sounds so dumb but like,,, imagine it. May died trying to help Norman, and Peter nearly threw away his morals to avenge her death by killing Norman himself. Now he's faced with another version of Osborn who is so much more fucked up, who's been through so much shit, and all Peter can see past that shitty clown make-up is the poor man who needed help who his aunt died trying to help. The man who went to FEAST knowing Peter could help. The man who one second was scared of everything including himself, and the next was laughing uncontrollably, even through the punches Peter pounded into him.

What if Peter decides Mays death won't be in vain. That even if this isn't the same Norman Osborn, he's going to help him and he won't die trying like May. He's going to avenge her death the right way.

Then cue the Bats freaking the FUCK out because???? As much as they beat the shit out of him, Bruce had spent years trying to help him, then this homeless and totally adoptable kid shows up out of nowhere and is breaking past the Joker and to the real man trapped behind it all?????

babe. I know we’re all going thru a lot rn but I just wanna give u the heads up that sesame streets future is in jeopardy. hbo has chosen not to renew it for new episodes (a series that has been going since 1969) and the residents of 123 Sesame Street no longer have a home :(

so I’m looking at short story publishers (fantasy)

Tor, cream of the crop. 25 cents a word. Stories can be read for free (YES). Slowish response time at ~3 months. Prefer under 12k, absolute maximum is 17.5k. Don’t bother if it’s not highly professional quality. SFWA qualifying.

Crossed Genres. 6 cents a word. Different theme each month (this month’s is “failure”). Submissions must combine either sci-fi or fantasy with the theme. Response time 1 month. 1k-6k, no exceptions. SFWA qualifying.

Long Hidden, anthology from CG. 6 cents a word. 2k-8k, no exceptions. Must take place before 1935. Protagonist(s) must be under 18 and marginalized in their time and place. Must be sci-fi/fantasy/horror. Deadline 30 April. Response by 1 October.

Queers Destroy Science Fiction. Sci-fi only right now, author must identify as queer (gay, lesbian, bi, ace, pan, trans, genderfluid, etc, just not cishet). 7.5k max. Deadline 15 February. Responses by 1 March. You can submit one flash fiction and one short story at the same time. (My network blocks the Lightspeed site for some reason, so I can’t get all the submission details. >_>) Probably SFWA qualifying?

Women in Practical Armor. 6 cents a word. 2k-5k. Must be about 1) a female warrior who 2) is already empowered and 3) wears sensible armour. Deadline 1 April. Response within three months.

Fiction Vortex. $10 per story, with $20 and $30 for editor’s and readers’ choice stories (hoping to improve). Speculative fiction only. Imaginative but non-florid stories. 7.5k maximum, preference for 5k and under. (I kind of want to support them on general principle.)

Urban Fantasy Magazine. 6 cents a word. 8k max, under 4k preferred. Must be urban fantasy (aka, the modern world, doesn’t need to be a literal city). 

Nightmare. 6 cents a word. 1.5-7.5k, preference for under 5k. Horror and dark fantasy. Response time up to two weeks. SFWA and HWA qualifying.

Apex Magazine. 6 cents a word. 7.5k max, no exceptions. Dark sci-fi/fantasy/horror. SFWA qualifying.

Asimov’s Science Fiction. 8-10 cents a word. 20k max, 1k minimum. Sci-fi; borderline fantasy is ok, but not S&S. Prefer character focused. Response time 5 weeks; query at 3 months. SFWA qualifying, ofc.

Buzzy Mag. 10 cents a word. 10k max. Should be acceptable for anyone 15+. Response time 6-8 weeks. SFWA qualifying.

Strange Horizons. 8 cents a word. Speculative fiction. 10k max, prefers under 5k. Response time 40 days. Particularly interested in diverse perspectives, nuanced approahces to political issues, and hypertexts. SFWA qualifying. 

Fantasy and Science Fiction. 7-12 cents a word. Speculative fiction, preference for character focus, would like more science-fiction or humour. 25k maximum. Prefers Courier. Response time 15 days.

Scigentasy. 3 cents a word. .5-5k. Science-fiction and fantasy, progressive/feminist emphasis. Fantastic Stories of the Imagination. 15 cents a word. 3k maximum. Any sci-fi/fantasy, they like a literary bent. (psst, steinbecks!) They also like to see both traditional and experimental approaches. Response time two weeks. 

Beneath Ceaseless Skies. 6 cents a word. 10k maximum. Fantasy in secondary worlds only (it can be Earth, but drastically different—alternate history or whatever). Character focus, prefer styles that are lush yet clear, limited first or third person narration. Response time usually 2-4 weeks, can be 5-7 weeks. SFWA qualifying.

Clarkesworld. 10 cents a word up to 4000, 7 afterwards. 1-8k, preferred is 4k. Science-fiction and fantasy. Needs to be well-written and convenient to read on-screen. Appreciates rigour. No talking cats. Response time 2 days. SFWA qualifying.

Orson Scott Card’s Intergalactic Medicine Show. 6 cents a word. Any length. Science-fiction and fantasy (along with fantastic horror). Good world-building and characterization. Clear straightforward prose. Response time three months. Yes, OSC is editor-in-chief. SFWA qualifying.

Interzone. Sub-pro rates if anything (but highly respected). 10k max. Short cover letter. Science-fiction and fantasy.

It’s a nice day. That’s what Alex focuses on, and it’s something to hold onto.

It’s a nice day. Blue skies, no clouds, the sun high in the sky—but with a bit of a breeze, so that it’s not too hot.

It’s a nice day. Which is why it really is a shame that his day is ruined already. It’s 11AM—hasn’t even reached noon—and this is turning out to be a shitshow.

“Fire now! It will not be able to reform as quickly as the other!” Someone shouts in his comm. Agent W, probably. She was always one to see the little inconsistencies. To see how quickly one could heal in comparison to another.

He shoots. He does not miss. It falls from the sky, with its clear sky and cloudless expanse, and lays crumpled on the ground.

He does not approach. That will be someone else’s job; his is to aim, to shoot, and to not miss.

He never does.

A marksman is what he is, no dressing it up. He might wear the white clothes, have the same honorific, but at the end of the day, he is paid to shoot.

He looks at it with curiosity. Even from this far away, he can see the little twitches it makes, as though it’s being electrocuted in small, sharp increments. Death twitches, he’s heard them call.

He smirks to himself at the name; what an ironic phrase, to be a dead thing and to relive your final moments.

He cannot deny that he is curious about it; but really who wouldn’t be?

What a curious thing in that it was a monster masquerading as human. Acting like a human, moving as a human.

He turns away as someone starts to inch closer to it. There’s no need to listen to the pleading, not when it’s mimicry meant to lure.

It’s a nice day. A beautiful day, even. He should take Julia to the park—she’d be turning 8 soon, and he didn’t know when he might have to leave for a mission.

He turns away from the pleading-turned-screaming, and hums under his breath as he checks his rifle.

What a beautiful day.

Gods, it’d be impossible to properly pull off like how I’m picturing, but imagine a story entirely from the perspective of a GIW agent.

Like, put aside all your existing knowledge of what ghosts are really like and imagine entering the story with only their knowledge. As far as you are aware, the main character is correct about their beliefs. You have no reason to doubt them (yet).

You are part of a government branch tasked with fighting monsters. Every single one of them is immune to conventional weaponry and can have a wide array of superpowers.

And they’re intelligent, too. Not like how a person is intelligent though; they’re not sentient. Sure, they can mimic it, but it’s all an illusion. Under the surface, they’re still just mindless monsters. You can’t reason with them.

Oh and also, they could be anywhere. They can theoretically spring up from any time anyone dies, or can emerge from entirely unpredictable natural portals.

And regardless of if any actual ghosts are present, the very material that makes them up can contaminate humans too. Not just making them sick, that’d be one thing, but making them monstrous in similar ways. Even if you’ve gotten rid of the ghosts, the entire town might be too far gone already.

And then, of course, the actual plot progresses. The character actually interacts with the world, and all the little inconsistencies start to add up. Maybe the character eventually notices, or maybe it’s left as fridge horror as only the reader can realize the truth of the protagonist’s ongoing evil actions.

Though of course that concept does rely on the idea that the reader doesn’t know the truth going in, which is impossible for a fanfic since readers would already be familiar with canon. So in reality, it’d have to be dramatic irony instead of a creeping realization (which could still work but feels a bit less evocative IMO). Or maybe calling it an AU would work to distract people enough, but idk.

(The evolution trigger is ✨Trauma✨)

Edit: since there seems to be some confusion about all the AU Jasons, here's a list of where they're from.

From Left to right Red Hooded Ninja: Young Justice cartoon Red Hood: Red Hood and the Outlaws (2016), DC comics Arkham Knight: Batman: Arkham Knight video game Red Robin: Death in the Family interactive movie Father Todd: Flashpoint: The World of Flashpoint #2, DC comics

some drawings of jason i did from twt<3333

Aeolus: DONT. open this bag. keep your friends close and your ENEMIES (!!) closer.

Winnows: *pssssst* guys it’s treasure he’s hoarding it

Odysseus: What??!!

Penelope: OPEN YOUR EYES THEY’RE OPENING THE BAG YOU IDIOT.

💀💀💀

guys i LOVEEEE PJO, but. if I see ONE MORE FIC of Annabeth & Percy calling each other “Wise Girl” & “Seaweed Brain” throughout the entire fic i’m going to commit myself to a mental hospital. PLEASE. THEY HAVE NAMES. USE THEM.

THIS IS A LIFE-OR-DEATH SITUATION! THEY DONT NEED CUTESY NICKNAMES ON THE FIELD.