I Tap The Mic. “Most People Don’t Want To Crawl Down Your Chimney And Steal Your Dog.”

I tap the mic. “Most people don’t want to crawl down your chimney and steal your dog.”

the crowd murmurs uncertainly.

“If someone wants to steal your dog,” I continue, “there are easier ways to do that. They don’t have to crawl into a chimney.”

Murmuring intensifies. People stand in their seats and begin to boo.

“People disguising themselves as chimney sweepers and stealing dogs is not a rational fear,” I shout. “Literally anyone could steal your dog. Why make sweeping chimneys illegal?”

“I have a list of chimney sweeps who stole dogs from parks!” Someone yells, throwing a shoe.

“You seriously think no chimney sweepers could possibly ever steal from a home?” Another cries.

“Only a dog thief would even want to crawl into a chimney to begin with!” Says a third.

A single tear rolls down my cheek. They are all so fucking stupid

This is a metaphor

More Posts from Implode-alright and Others

3 months ago

💫Commissions Open!💫

💫Commissions Open!💫

Hello! Happy to announce i'm gonna have my commissions open from now on.

If you're interested, please fill out this form:

💫Tarot card Commissions💫 Inkeyjay
Google Docs
Hello! If you're here you're somewhat interested in getting a commissions! First of all, thank you, i really appreciate your interest. Secon

The form is planned for tarot card commissions (Usually around 400€) but here are my rates for other kinds of art i also do. If you want any of these, just let me know in the form:

Full body character design: 250€

Portraits: 100€

Full illustration: Starts at 500€

I'm also always on the lookout for bigger projects, so if you have anything in mind, just write me an e-mail to inkeyjay.art@gmail.com

1 week ago

Hi it seems like you made a post but forgot to make it about me?

1 month ago
New Windows AI feature records everything you’ve done on your PC
Ars Technica
Recall uses AI features "to take images of your active screen every few seconds."

I think every computer user needs to read this because holy fucking shit this is fucking horrible.

So Windows has a new feature incoming called Recall where your computer will first, monitor everything you do with screenshots every couple of seconds and "process that" with an AI.

Hey, errrr, fuck no? This isn't merely because AI is really energy intensive to the point that it causes environmental damage. This is because it's basically surveilling what you are doing on your fucking desktop.

This AI is not going to be on your desktop, like all AI, it's going to be done on another server, "in the cloud" to be precise, so all those data and screenshot? They're going to go off to Microsoft. Microsoft are going to be monitoring what you do on your own computer.

Now of course Microsoft are going to be all "oooh, it's okay, we'll keep your data safe". They won't. Let me just remind you that evidence given over from Facebook has been used to prosecute a mother and daughter for an "illegal abortion", Microsoft will likely do the same.

And before someone goes "durrr, nuthin' to fear, nuthin to hide", let me remind you that you can be doing completely legal and righteous acts and still have the police on your arse. Are you an activist? Don't even need to be a hackivist, you can just be very vocal about something concerning and have the fucking police on your arse. They did this with environmental protesters in the UK. The culture war against transgender people looks likely to be heading in a direction wherein people looking for information on transgender people or help transitioning will be tracked down too. You have plenty to hide from the government, including your opinions and ideas.

Again, look into backing up your shit and switching to Linux Mint or Ubuntu to get away from Microsoft doing this shit.

6 days ago

"Punishment works!!!" We're drowning in three to four generations of people so pants-shittingly terrified of ever being wrong that half of everyone has constructed a worldview wherein they never even consider the possibility that they could be wrong and the other half behaves like one wrong move will make anything or anyone explode violently into a million irreperable pieces. I don't think it works guys

1 month ago

i have never met an unpsychotic person who knows what it actually means to “not encourage the delusion” …not a single one

4 months ago

How I think how Silco’s knife clattering to the ground when first meeting powder/jinx represents and foreshadows their relationship

How I Think How Silco’s Knife Clattering To The Ground When First Meeting Powder/jinx Represents And

Thinking abt how when Silco first approaches powder he hides his knife behind his back, possibly intending to finish the job after getting the info he needs. AKA Vander’s knife, the same knife that Silco swiped and used to escape from Vander during his drowning. Which he kept all those years, and ended up ultimately killing Vander with just moments prior, a shot cuts to Vander’s blood still fresh and dripping from the blade. A knife he has used to defend himself from both danger and death, to protect himself from harm by someone he loved.

But when powder goes and hugs Silco, that knife clatters to the ground, out of his grasps. Silco’s protection, the one thing that had helped Silco escape death, the one thing he uses to defend himself. When his hand first rises, Silco’s goons make a face, most likely expecting to hurt/push away powder. But this time there is no violence, instead there are welcoming arms.

In that moment, the knife dropping to the ground not only shows powder breaking down Silco’s emotional walls that he had built up to protect himself. But also to show that when he hugs her back, Silco is quite literally and unknowingly accepting death with open arms.

In the show we see that even when Jinx is hostile towards him and purposely hurting Silco, he’s relatively calm, and doesn’t return the hostility. Or when she makes mistakes, Silco is forgiving. In their relationship, Silco “has no knife”, aka he has no defense when it comes to Jinx. Because, she is his undoing, Jinx is Silco’s weakness, and it was shown from the very start.

When powder first pulls a jinx, killing her family and vander in the process, Silco welcomes her with open arms. And in the last episode when she pulls another jinx, killing Silco, Silco only has love and reassurance to give. No knife to protect himself this time, again finding himself at death’s door because of someone he loves. But this time there’s no bitterness or hate. Only forgiveness, understanding and love, the things Vander failed to show him when Silco pulled his own jinx and ended up being the cause of Felicia’s death.

But yeah. Idk if any of this made sense. But. Is there anything so undoing…as a daughter? SOBS


Tags
2 months ago

I've been seeing a lot of posts about piracy lately and in light of this i do need to say something because I've been seeing a lot of misinformation.

anti-viruses, vpns, ad-blockers- none of these are going to help you here.

the first thing you're going to need is a good solid boat (preferably oak wood). you will also want some cannons and a plank depending on the sort of shenanigans you plan on getting into.

Also! Not once have i seen any of you talking about the importance of citrus fruits and vitamin C. antivirus doesn't prevent scurvy. come on you should know this by now.

this sort of misinformation is wildly dangerous and irresponsible.


Tags
1 week ago

i want john to narrate an ocean nature documentary

“OH ORTHER…. that jellyfish… it’s.. massive”

also he’d make everything sound like some hideous sea monster

“it’s fins turn up in knife-like spikes, it’s bulbous eye, protrudes from its head…” (he’s literally just describing a common sea bass)

2 months ago
Religious Art Leaves Out The Best Part And It’s Such A Goddamn Shame. Livestock, Agriculture And Food
Religious Art Leaves Out The Best Part And It’s Such A Goddamn Shame. Livestock, Agriculture And Food
Religious Art Leaves Out The Best Part And It’s Such A Goddamn Shame. Livestock, Agriculture And Food
Religious Art Leaves Out The Best Part And It’s Such A Goddamn Shame. Livestock, Agriculture And Food
Religious Art Leaves Out The Best Part And It’s Such A Goddamn Shame. Livestock, Agriculture And Food
Religious Art Leaves Out The Best Part And It’s Such A Goddamn Shame. Livestock, Agriculture And Food
Religious Art Leaves Out The Best Part And It’s Such A Goddamn Shame. Livestock, Agriculture And Food
Religious Art Leaves Out The Best Part And It’s Such A Goddamn Shame. Livestock, Agriculture And Food
Religious Art Leaves Out The Best Part And It’s Such A Goddamn Shame. Livestock, Agriculture And Food

Religious art leaves out the best part and it’s such a goddamn shame. Livestock, Agriculture and Food is an integral part of any culture and we all need to be pushing for more realistic sheep in religious art. #FATTAILSFORJESUS

  • perfectlyjoyfulnut
    perfectlyjoyfulnut reblogged this · 3 days ago
  • almostloudstarfish
    almostloudstarfish liked this · 3 days ago
  • inevera
    inevera liked this · 3 days ago
  • cwicseolfor
    cwicseolfor reblogged this · 3 days ago
  • cwicseolfor
    cwicseolfor liked this · 3 days ago
  • choreomaniacal
    choreomaniacal reblogged this · 4 days ago
  • choreomaniacal
    choreomaniacal liked this · 4 days ago
  • overprotectivecatdad
    overprotectivecatdad liked this · 4 days ago
  • missymistake
    missymistake reblogged this · 4 days ago
  • wun4a
    wun4a liked this · 4 days ago
  • davvero-annoiatx
    davvero-annoiatx liked this · 4 days ago
  • bobs-reynolds
    bobs-reynolds reblogged this · 4 days ago
  • aturnipsingularity
    aturnipsingularity reblogged this · 4 days ago
  • bisexual-neco-arc
    bisexual-neco-arc reblogged this · 4 days ago
  • bisexual-neco-arc
    bisexual-neco-arc liked this · 4 days ago
  • goodlittlet0y
    goodlittlet0y liked this · 4 days ago
  • soggycereal
    soggycereal reblogged this · 4 days ago
  • soggycereal
    soggycereal liked this · 4 days ago
  • timtim-the-canadian-hat
    timtim-the-canadian-hat liked this · 4 days ago
  • tboy-perpetua
    tboy-perpetua reblogged this · 4 days ago
  • blazingpegasys
    blazingpegasys reblogged this · 5 days ago
  • 384302
    384302 reblogged this · 5 days ago
  • dysregulatedcreative
    dysregulatedcreative reblogged this · 5 days ago
  • dysregulatedcreative
    dysregulatedcreative liked this · 5 days ago
  • quickfixinator
    quickfixinator liked this · 5 days ago
  • dionysianmirth
    dionysianmirth liked this · 5 days ago
  • what-is-this-world
    what-is-this-world reblogged this · 5 days ago
  • dreamyslothbunny
    dreamyslothbunny liked this · 5 days ago
  • sauleline2
    sauleline2 reblogged this · 5 days ago
  • falceon-core
    falceon-core liked this · 5 days ago
  • mudalchemy
    mudalchemy reblogged this · 5 days ago
  • ionlygobye
    ionlygobye reblogged this · 5 days ago
  • celestialily
    celestialily liked this · 5 days ago
  • dionysianmirth
    dionysianmirth reblogged this · 5 days ago
  • babey-b
    babey-b liked this · 5 days ago
  • god-of-fandoms
    god-of-fandoms liked this · 6 days ago
  • lilacs-and-earl-gray-tea
    lilacs-and-earl-gray-tea reblogged this · 6 days ago
  • reading-on-the-sofa
    reading-on-the-sofa reblogged this · 6 days ago
  • reading-on-the-sofa
    reading-on-the-sofa liked this · 6 days ago
  • hotshot9
    hotshot9 reblogged this · 6 days ago
  • hotshot9
    hotshot9 liked this · 6 days ago
  • department-shoe-stud
    department-shoe-stud reblogged this · 6 days ago
  • crclocalunhingedsith
    crclocalunhingedsith reblogged this · 6 days ago
  • knisyd
    knisyd liked this · 6 days ago
  • mustachioedmoose
    mustachioedmoose reblogged this · 6 days ago
  • pocket-sized-potato
    pocket-sized-potato reblogged this · 6 days ago
  • sallypejr
    sallypejr liked this · 6 days ago
  • paraprosdokia
    paraprosdokia reblogged this · 6 days ago
  • paraprosdokia
    paraprosdokia liked this · 6 days ago
  • crc-jedi-knight-serushna
    crc-jedi-knight-serushna liked this · 6 days ago

He/him Pfp by Vorpaelyzis !

118 posts

Explore Tumblr Blog
Search Through Tumblr Tags