I Don’t Even Know How To Do Long Division How Am I Sposed To Keep Track Of How Many Hunters Are In

Roger and Jack are so “Bffs who shit talk everyone else in the friend group and also shit talk each other to their faces and mean it but in an endearing way but also not really” coded to me

why are we as a fandom still calling roger a sadist stop that or else

JACK LIES TO THE OFFICER ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED ON THE ISLANDDD

He died doing what he loved. Being fatally injured.

I hate when I say things like "oh I want an ipod classic but with bluetooth so I can use wireless headphones" and some peanut comes in and replies with "so a smartphone with spotify?" No. I want a 160GB+ rectangular monstrosity where I can download every version of every song I want to it and it does nothing except play music and I don't need a data connection and don't have to pay a subscription to not have ads and don't have popups suggesting terrible AI playlists all over the menus.

Gimme the clicky wheel and song titles like "My Chemical Romance- The Black Parade- Blood (Bonus Track)- secret track- album rip- high quality"

top 10 downfalls of lotf fandom

10. fanart from the 2000s

9. the two movies AND the new series not having book accurate looking characters

8. INSANE rarepairs that highkey freak me out

7. skinny piggy fanart

6. THOSE aus.

5. roger and simon being snowbunnied

4. jack glazers (sexualisers)

🥉 people that call jalph ‘homoerotic’

🥈 people that call roger a sadist (being a sadist and being sadistic is different, google is free)

🥇the soft-boyification of simon

what would have happened if there wasn’t a boat that day?.. nothing good for our Ralphie that’s for sure!

Old LOTF art of mine from when I read the book last year. Still a fav piece.

lotf gen z au hcs

ralph - that one actually chill popular guy that everyone just has a mutual liking too, plays on the football team and is team captain, all the girls call him leng and ask him to snap them back. tells his annoying ass friends to stop when they make fun of some random year 7 with a big bag. amazing grades, him and jack have rivalry over it

jack - i don’t care what anyone says he’s an absolute SWAT. teachers pet, puts his hand up for every question and has all those badges on his blazer. gets made fun of for being ginger and a neek. still head choir boy in the school choir and also gets made fun of for that. predicted 8s and 9s and cried to his mum about a predicted 7. his parents definitely have him saved in their phones as “jackie sweetie pumpkin ❤️❤️”

piggy - gets picked on for every question and jack rages about it and sometimes gets sent out. exactly the same type of guy as beefy bert from horrid henry. also gets picked on but just for being fat and eating in the canteen by himself. jacks choir have their own table in the canteen and they throw food at piggy. actually pretty good grades though he just doesn’t work well under pressure.

roger - quiet ass emo looking guy no one really knows anything about but they don’t pick on him because he sent a kid to hospital once. has a criminal record. jacks closest mate, the two sing surprisingly well together. has a collection of animal skulls in his bedroom and he def has that voice that sounds like he has a blocked nose all the time. grades are in the middle ish the only reason he’s good is because he copies off of jack.

maurice - tries to be class clown. sometimes succeeds sometimes fails. only reason people like him is because he’ll do anything to get a laugh out of people. mates with roger, hes the type of guy to turn to roger and say “hey bud, why don’t you turn that frown upside down!” and he sings “i fell in love with an emo girl” at roger. completely dumb as hell tho has predicted 2s with the occasional 3 or 4. in choir but his voice is AWFUL so they got him to play piano. he plays rugby and is an INSANE tackler.

samneric - class clowns that are actually funny. also relatively good grades. they switch classes to mess up their teachers but one time eric fell down the stairs and broke his nose so you could tell the two apart. they’re funny at the right place in the right time and they’re in the year below jack, ralph, simon etc and they look up to maurice. they follow around jack and his choir or ralph but jack gets mad when they hang out with ralph and not him.

simon - also quiet kid but he’s painfully shy. pretty nice overall and he’s friends with ralph which is the only reason he doesn’t get picked on. people whisper about him though and he’s like a time bomb you never know when he’s gonna lose it. that one kid that has every pet at home known to mankind and he def brought his ferret into school once. in choir with jack and the others and they’re actually pretty nice to him, he hangs out with maurice and bill and harold etc. also piggy’s only friend. but secretly doesn’t really like him.

extra :

-the littluns are the year 7s that run for their lives to the canteen

-jack and maurice use brainrot language and jack will angrily huff “what the sigma?!” when he can’t figure something out

-jack and ralph both did the school play one year and actually became pretty good friends but then stopped talking for some unknown reason