MUN VS. MUSE. How To Play: Compare Yourself To Your Muse. Then Tag Your Mutuals To Do The Same.

bless you truly, man. this means a lot to me.

i can't wait to see colin's reactions to everything. you take all the time you need.

please feel free to send in things to either julius or sonic concerning it, i def want that.

Snively is having some (irrational) rejection feels that are fueled by complex ptsd (canonical childhood and adolescent trauma) based on getting emotionally attached to an uncle from a different dimension while also trying to stay loyal to the Mobian Resistance, but I, the mun, keep being too fkn sick to sit up in bed and write about it coherently ic!

ARG!!! chronic illness SUCKS!!!

the silence was strangling. felt like it had a vice grip on his throat, threatening to close up his windpipe. great job being quiet, julius, you stupid piece of shit⸻ say something. SAY SOMETHING, FUCKING TALK⸻

"......i'm," his fingers shift, and he moves to rub a hand along the side of his own neck, not looking at stone as he says this, "i'm sorry you never got to tell ivo," that felt strange to say, "the things you wanted to." he felt jealousy nip in his chest and knew that was irrational and stupid. he barely knew stone after all. & clearly they were both lonely from, everything either of them had gone through. but julius wanted to throw caution to the wind and let himself feel jealous, want stone, want, want⸻ he always wanted but never knew how or if he should sate that wanting. if he had the right to.

what had stone called it? marinating? just marinating, coasting through life, he supposed. doing what he felt he had to. a death without dying.

he exhaled, not sure he had it in him to explain more. there was so much more he felt he wanted to say, it was conflicting. he was scared that if he didn't now, the opportunity might never present itself again. he wondered if that itself was irrational, or maybe stupid, or naive. too emotional, too sensitive. he also couldn't stand the silence. wanted to speak with stone, but didn't know how. was he afraid of judgment? rejection? stone recoiling?

was he scared more, maybe, of stone stepping forward to meet him, and accepting it? what would that mean? to be seen, accepted, wanted not in spite of his ugliness or his horrors or his darkness but because of it.

"...i want," he swallowed, inhaled shortly, exhaled, and finally looked at stone again, "i want to tell you. i do. i just... i don't know how. no one's, ever bothered to ask, before. to want to know," he isn't sure how to express that, so he, he just lays a palm against his own chest. as if to silently say 'to know me', all of him.

stone knew by the silence that seemingly yet again he'd said the wrong thing, and a small part of him was starting to grow irritated at that fact. he tries to do his best to listen and be reassuring but it's perceived as anything but, and he practically has to stop himself from letting out a frustrated sigh at the entire scenario.

he knew very well when to pick and choose his battles, and right now his annoyance was not needed nor welcomed.

so instead of speaking and potentially further souring things between them he just stands there, arms resting loosely over his chest as he watches julius stand up. there really wasn't much in the way of anything that he could say to the man, it seemed.

how to get rid of horrible and traumatic mental imagery and memories without literally turning to lethal levels of substance abuse

"sorry, i didn't realize this seat was taken," julius gave a softer smile, shuffling and moving his bookbag off the seat he'd set it on. his gaze lingered on the man in front of him, enjoying the way that his hair accentuated his face, and those eyes were beautiful too. he wondered if he had ever seen him around the eden club. julius cleared his throat, "are you, here with anyone, or are you waiting on someone?" realizing how bold that sounded, julius quickly clarified, "n-not that i'm! trying to, flirt or anything. i just thought if you had a moment, maybe we could try getting a coffee?"

starter. for roman (@blckfckinmsk) BASED ON THE PREMISE THAT JULIUS & ROMAN START DATING (before becoming bitter exes).

"How can you like these very toxic and horrible characters that have done despicable and unforgivable things?" oh it's quite simple actually, this is fiction and I think with my dick.

the playful maybe has julius' gaze narrowing a fraction behind those oval obscuring sunglasses. instead of roman moving to shake his hand, a device is placed in julius' outstretched palm. his fingers curl around it, eyebrow canting upward more as he pulls it closer to himself. hm. he supposed he could find some use for this. really when he'd mentioned it previously, he'd done so offhandedly. hadn't expected roman to actually remember.

pockets the piece of equipment for now, gaze resettling on roman as the other wipes blood off his face with a handkerchief. "worry. i never said i was worried." he scoffs, as if the thought of dead bodies were of any concern to julius. he smiles, in fact, "explain to me how you killed them." he may as well get some satisfaction out of knowing.

cont from (x) @drrobctnik

· 𓂃 ࣪˖🔪 ˖ ࣪𓂂 . "Maybeee~" It's spoken playfully as hands are held behind his back, clearly hiding something. Some equipment he recalls Julius mentioning that Roman had acquired in his recent raid of someone who owed him money. It's small, but he's sure there's more to it, but that's not really something he understood. That's why he found value in befriending someone like Julius, and wanted to keep that. Hence the gesture.

Equipment is held out in offer for the other to take before pulling out handkerchief from pocket to wipe off some of the blood still on his face. "I have people to clean up my messes for me, you don't have to worry about that."

"could you at least tell me your name?" (from amy!)

he had never meant to save her, to help her. if anything, his life would be so much easier if he had just left her to perish. he knew of her, by proxy, through sonic and sonic's constant blabbering about his little gaggle of mobian pals. something about an 'amy rose' & it was easy enough to know of her because of that signature hammer that sonic had mentioned too.

so when he'd noted the danger she was in, fatal no doubt, and he moved in order to protect her and shield her from that debris that would've no doubt crushed her? he couldn't answer as to why he'd done so. it had been instinctive, moving without conscious thought. he glanced down at her through those obscuring sunglasses: judging by the dumbfounded look on her face, she had no clue as to who he was. nor the fact that his errant destruction of nearby buildings during his previous battle with sonic, had caused the debris that would've been her death had julius not intervened. sonic was probably still rousing from the beating he'd taken, which is what gave julius time idle enough to just, observe her.

he turned away, about to leave, but she spoke which gave him pause.

"could you at least tell me your name?"

"....." his eyebrows furrowed, a slight frown etched along his facial muscles, how the action also narrowed his eyes. he shouldn't. really should not indulge her small talk. they would become enemies in time, this he knew: inevitable. julius and sonic fought so often, it would be no time at all before all the other mobian gaggle banded together in order to stop his 'evil'. well. he supposed it was evil to them. to himself, he saw death and murder as no great consequence. merely a byproduct, an inevitability born from julius' own disgust at himself. the world. his own cracking and fraying faith in goodness or the inherent kindness humanity strived to have. failed to, most days, from julius' own perspective. or maybe that was just his growing cynicism.

really shouldn't.

"julius robotnik." & without waiting for a response, maybe not being able to stomach her sincere thanks if she might give it, julius swiftly walks away from her. perhaps, in another life, if julius' path had been different, he and sonic and their little mobian gang could've been friends. on the same side.

....hmph.

what false hope.

marker -> wilhelm