Guys

this post's hypothetical by itself is already ridiculous but the thing that gets me is how the wording implies two very funny things that become funnier in tandem

1. "Accidentally, the pitcher tosses a Christian baby" means this is a mistake on the pitcher's part. i imagine the pitcher is breastfeeding on the field and they pitch and they look down at their hands and they see the ball still in the glove and they go "fuck"

2. hitting the baby will still win you the game

What a fucking narcissist.

can you guys watch my squab for me im gonna go on my smoko

"they forgot to give William a motive"

CAN A GIRL NOT HAVE A HOBBY??

if i missed one put it in the tags

turning this into a poll because i am just so beyond baffled right now.

Marinas

Zukka resurgence ‼️‼️

funger funneyyyyhwehehaa

(audio by @awesomestseacreature)

being on my period makes me feel like a wounded forest animal trying to find a warm dark small place to die