Its Like A Date Or Whatever

Arden Cho photographed by Randy Tran for Factice Magazine

something we agreed we like about uncle vernon is that despite like, personally suffering at the hands of wizards pretty significantly (dudley’s tail, marge), vernon is like, always ready to fuck with wizards? like he is SO SCARED of them but he’s always ready to fight? please take this moment to imagine uncle vernon meeting voldemort

Nursey’s a poet so sometimes he does ridiculous romantic stuff after a writing breakthrough 

fantasy book with witches and wizards and magical people but all magic has a price, like

main character, in awe and slightly terrified: what did you have to give up to be able to control storms with your mind?

powerful enchanter, fighting back tears as they pull down the hood of their cloak to reveal a knotted oily mess: my beautiful luscious hair….no matter how many times i wash or brush it, it always looks like this

main character: [horrified gasp]

If you're not too terribly busy, the world could always use more Holsom fluff :)

Holsom fluff, my favorite! I combined this with a secondary request from @zombizombi for some ref!Holster, which I could not resist, because Holster+bitching speaks to my soul. Also, team dentist!Ransom, because it amused me. (Warning: mention of teeth.)

Ransom landed in his seat barelyfive minutes before the game was supposed to start. Lardo, feet propped upagainst the glass, sketchbook against her knees, fingertips just peeking out ofthe sleeves of yet another sweatshirt stolen from Shitty, spared him a glanceand a “You’re late” before going back to sketching warm-ups.

“I know, I know. Kid broke off twoof her teeth on the playground, right up to the nerve, so I had to do somecomposites.”

She grimaced. “Ugh.”

“Why do you ask me these thingswhen you know I’m going to talk to you about teeth? I’m a dentist, for fuck’ssake. And we’re here to watch hockey.”

“I’m in it for the butts.”

He grinned as he took in the playerstretching on the ice in front of her and then her sketchbook. “Think Shitswill like that one?”

“I call it ‘Spread,’” she saidloftily.

He choked and was suddenly glad hehadn’t had time to stop by concessions on his way in. “So, uh, where is Shitstonight anyway?”

She waved a hand vaguely, barelymissing whacking him in the face with the end of the sleeve. “Up in the office.They needed some documents looked over.”

He recognized that tone. “How longhave you guys been here?”

“Hours.”

“Couldn’t get anyone to strip foryou?”

“Shut up.” Then she turned to himand smiled slowly.

Ransom was immediately alarmed. “Ohgod. What?”

“There is some news you’ll want.”

“Yeah?” he asked cautiously.

“New ref.”

Ransom’s eyebrows went up. “And I’minterested in this… because why? I mean, is he supposed to be good or biased orsomething else?”

“Tall. He’s supposed to be verytall. You’ll see.”

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top 15 dctv ladies (as voted by our followers) #10: Cat Grant

Throwback to the time my poor German teacher had to explain the concept of formal and informal pronouns to a class full of Australians and everyone was scandalised and loudly complained “why can’t I treat everyone the same?” “I don’t want to be a Sie!” “but being friendly is respectful!” “wouldn’t using ‘du’ just show I like them?” until one guy conceded “I suppose maybe I’d use Sie with someone like the prime minister, if he weren’t such a cunt” and my teacher ended up with her head in her hands saying “you are all banned from using du until I can trust you”

Tipsy Little Mix at the Brit Awards 2017 Winners’ Room

so i was brought back to the hazeapalooza blog post for an entirely different reason, but look!! i found the third instance to finally prove that holster 130% uses ransom’s first name whenever he is jealous

and a bonus, because really n, you’re not even trying to make this boy subtle